I am just so fucking lost
I am just so fucking lost. I just keep getting stuck in trances where all I can think about is how I never have really trusted Tri all that much in our relationship anyway, ever since the Nikki thing; only for a short while where I was blind, that’s all. I should have fucking gone with my instincts. I just feel so foolish, b/c I know he’s still gonna talk to them, and that he still has feelings for her, no matter what he says. It’s just like it’s more of a challenge now, which makes the whole “game” seem much more appealing. I so didn’t want to have to make him choose.
I’m sick and tired of people using me as a practice dummy: they beat me so hard until I can’t feel, and then tell me how I have made them a much bigger person, and then they leave me and go on their merry little fucking way, and leave me to use everything that humbled them from my relationship, and go use all that information on someone else. I’m tired of helping people live, see, be a good person, whatever the fuck it is, it’s not my job. I am so done with trying.
oh ya, happy new year
I’m sick and tired of people using me as a practice dummy: they beat me so hard until I can’t feel, and then tell me how I have made them a much bigger person, and then they leave me and go on their merry little fucking way, and leave me to use everything that humbled them from my relationship, and go use all that information on someone else. I’m tired of helping people live, see, be a good person, whatever the fuck it is, it’s not my job. I am so done with trying.
oh ya, happy new year