[private to Bret, backdated to Saturday]

[posinglikeaswan]

Bret
I wrote you a song. Hopefully it I hope it clears up some questions.

When I told you that women don't know you like I do
I wasn't suggesting that you should come to
Some weird conjecture where you love me now too
But you do
And I'm flattered
But I can't love you too
And I'm sympathetic, too

Though I think it's kind of weird that it's you who loves likes me
But every time something happens your memory is dodgy
And I'm left seeing things I don't wanna see
Like that one time at Dave's party in 2003
Where you downed a litre of beer and some lemon and whisky
And you kissed me

And I also think it's weird that on New Years Eve
We had sex
And I think it might be best if we lay that to rest
And just put it behind us
And might I suggest
That maybe you drink less?

I think everyone in Rowan would appreciate this

And I'm not saying that I don't think you're great
I want to be friends
But when you touch my penis it's sort of hard to pretend
That everything's cool
And it sucks when you cry
Because sex can't be fun when there's salt in your eyes

So I'd like to come home, Bret, if that's okay
And I'm really not uncomfortable with you being gay
Because you just can't help it if you're born that way
But some people aren't born that way
And hopefully that's okay
Too