Title: Shigehontas (That's a fusion of Shige and Pocahontas, in case you couldn't tell)
Pairing: Jin Smith/Shigehontas
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Crack, excess profanity, hints at sexual encounters
Disclaimer: Don't own them, or Pocahontas
Summary: Shigehontas falls in love with the stranger from another world, Jin Smith, but their love faces obstacles.
A/N: It's just best not to ask. It's also 4:40 AM right now, but if I don't post this now I might never be do it, so feel free to point out any typos or whatever that I missed. Constructive criticism is always welcome.
The sun was shining and the birds were singing, what better day could there be to set sail on a voyage to the new world. The dock was crowded, full of men eager to go off and find riches beyond their wildest imaginings; for the new world was rumored to be rich and bountiful, gold and jewels aplenty, enough for every man to be set for this life and the next. Some men were bidding their loved ones adieu, while others joked, already aboard the S.S. Matador.
“Oi, is that Smith? It’s Smith!” Murakami shouted as he pointed at the figure steadily approaching the ship.
“That’s him alright! If he’s coming this voyage is sure to be eight times more interesting already.” Subaru responded equally as loudly, as he clapped Murakami on the back.
“Captain Jin Smith?” The awed voice of young, naive Junnos exhaled as he stopped beside his new crewmates to glance out over the docks, “I’ve heard such wonderful stories about him. Is it true he defeated a whole ship of pirates on his own?”
“Yup, that’s Jin alright, he could out drink a fish when it comes to the spirits!”
“Damn right I can! Just you wait boys; any Savage that wants to take me on is in for a big surprise!” Jin Smith jubilantly exclaimed as he stepped aboard, “I’ll woo them with wine and then when they’re not looking, BAM I unleash my attack!”
“Yeah, that’s not the only thing he’ll unleash.” Subaru laughed, “I hear you got booted from your last ship because you were sleeping with the Commodore’s wife!”
“It’s not my fault he’s a jealous bastard; I tried to tell Kamenashi that it was only the once, I even offered a threesome, but he just wouldn’t listen to reason.” Jin defended himself.
¬
“Heeeey, the chiefs back!!”
“Everybody, the chiefs back!”
“Massu’s back?!”
Hey, Chief Massu’s back!”
“Welcome back my friend.” Ohno greeted as Massu stepped up to embrace him. His people celebrates the return of his company with exuberance all around him.
“It’s good to be back, but tell me, where is my son?”
“Oh, you know Shigehontas, he’s just like his mother, he probably got lost somewhere while picking berries.”
Massu smiled.
Shigehontas lay under the shade of the trees, up on the edge of a cliff overlooking the expansive river. He was enjoying the quiet serenity of nature, with wildlife frolicking around him. He sighed contentedly as the wind blew through his dark hair; there was something about these mountains and their woods that settled a calm feeling in his heart. He shot up and crawled forward to look over the side of the cliff when he heard a loud shout from below.
“Oi! Shige! What the fuck are you doing? You’re fathers back, get your ass down here!” his best friend Naryoma was canoeing down the river below.
“He’s back?” Shige mused, “Ryo, he’s really back?!”
“No, I just thought I’d lie to you for the hell of it. Of course he’s back, dipshit!”
Shige rushed to get up to run down the trail. In his excitement he lost his footing, plummeting over the edge to the watery depths below.
“Fuck! Shige, what the hell! That’s not what I meant you moron!”
Shige plunged through the air, flailing wildly, as he fell the fifty feet to the water’s surface. He yelped as he penetrated the icy liquid, immediately having the breath knocked out of him. He shot out his limbs in an attempt to swim, somehow managing to break the surface in a few short minutes. He fervently tried to clamber into Ryo’s canoe, ignoring the loud laughter that the shorter man was emitting. A shrill shriek escaped his lips as he felt the vessel tipping, and his body submerging again. When he managed to resurface, Shige found himself inside of the upturned canoe, an angry Ryo glaring at him. He yelped at the sound slap to the side of his head from the sullen man.
“You are so retarded. Why the hell am I friends with you?”
Shige smiled sheepishly as they righted the canoe and set off for home. When they finally arrived there was a crowd around Massu as he recounted their epic war tales, marking his men with tribal marks of honor. His new favorite seemed to be a very attractive, but very stoic man with enviable pectoral muscles.
“Mmmm, wouldn’t I like a piece of that ass!” Ryo muttered just loud enough for Shige to hear.
“Oh yes, I especially like his smile.” Shige remarked dryly, smirking when a smile tugged at Ryo’s lips.
Shige ran up to greet his father as soon as the formalities ended. He had so missed Massu’s smiling face, and his unique way of looking at things. They soon entered the chieftain’s wigwam to catch up on all of the lost time that these recent battles had brought upon them.
“For a while now, father, I’ve been having this weird dream. I feel like it’s some kind of premonition, telling me to expect something new to happen; something exciting.” Shige excitedly exclaimed.
“Funny you should say that.” Massu began sunnily.
“Oh! What is it father?”
“Pipium has asked for your hand in marriage!” Massu seemed utterly delighted at the thought of it.
“Marry…Pi?”
“Yes, I already told him that I approved one hundred percent.”
“But…he’s so…..Serious!” Shige tried to argue.
“But he can protect you and give you a good home and family. Trust me, Shigehontas, you want to marry him, it’s for the best.” Massu explained, “He’ll even out your fail; make you steady, like the river!”
Shige raised his eyebrows at that comment. Steady, like the river full of aquatic life? Yeah, because that made sense.
“Here,” Massu held out his hand to his son, two tiny silver hoop earrings on his outstretched palm, “Your mother wore these at our wedding. You can wear one of them at least at your own!”
¬___________________
Shige ventured deep into the woods, where the trees and the animals still possessed their otherworldly spirits. Whenever he was feeling extra depressed or needed someone to talk to this was where he went.
“Is that you Shigehontas?” The voice of the old willow tree greeted him as he climbed up in its branches.
“Yoko Willow! I need your help! I don’t want to marry Pi!”
“Pi? You mean Pipium? He’s so serious! Why would you want to marry him?”
“I don’t! But my father wants me to.” Shige sighed dejectedly, “I don’t know what to do Yoko Willow.”
“Marry Pipium and just fool around with some other guy. Or two.”
“Yoko Willow! You’re never actually any help!” Shige admonished, “I’ve been having this dream lately and…”
“OH A DREAM!” Yoko Willow giggled, “Story time!”
“Anyway, there’s this spinning arrow. It keeps going around and around, until suddenly it stops.” Shige finished.
“Listen to your heart. You will understand.”
“Yoko Willow, can’t you give me real advice for once?” Shige rolled his eyes to the side annoyed. “What are those? Weird new clouds?”
“Go look child, go and see what the winds bring us!!” Yoko Willow cackled as Shige trotted off in the direction of the large white shapes that clouded the distant sky.
_____
Governor Tegoshi was idly playing with his dog Tiny as his manservant Maruyama brought him his lunch, Jin Smith standing before his table, crassly having the gale to inspect his nails, as if he had better places to be.
“You know Smith; I’m counting on you to handle any problems with savages.” He told the other.
“They can’t be any worse than other savages have been. I’ll take care of them in no time.” Jin replied, “I’m a master swordsman you know.”
Tegoshi inspected the grape being offered him, “Uh-huh, I’m sure you are. You may go now, and stay out of the whisky, it’s supposed to last us the entire voyage, not one night.”
“Whatever.”
“Oh, and go explore, make sure that you take care of any problems in our immediate vicinity, kay.”
“Yeah, sure.”
____
Shige watched from his spot hidden in the foliage as the strange man fought with the small woodland creatures around him. He’d never seen anyone acting so unrefined. Even Ryo had more couth than this fool; who had arguments with animals?
“Oooooi! Back up off my pocky you damn furry pests. You are so not cute. Whoever claimed animals are cute is a dirty liar!”
“What, is this guy retarded?” Shige muttered.
Apparently he was loud enough to have been heard, “Hey, who’s there!”
Shige took off running through the trees as fast as he could, jumping over rocks, and sliding around bushes. He could hear the heavy footsteps of the stranger giving chase behind him. Shige clutched at his side as he heaved for breath; Maybe Ryo was right, he needed to get in better shape after all. A sigh escaped his lips when the winding river came into sight. If he could just jump across the rocks and hide behind the waterfall then he’d be safe.
He picked up speed as he approached the river bank, preparing to leap to the first large rock, and his safety. His eyes widened as his foot slipped, barely catching the edge of the slippery rock. For the second time in days he found himself falling into the river. He struggled as he felt hands grabbing his shoulders and pulling him out of the water, laying him out upon the sandy bank.
He looked up into dark, smirking eyes. “Uh-oh, you nearly drowned,” The man drawled, “I think you might need mouth-to-mouth!”
Shige froze when he felt warm lips pressing against his mouth, a choked gurgling noise escaping when a thick tongue pushed into the cavern. When the stranger finally pulled back, looking quite satisfied, Shige was left sputtering like a fish out of water.
“What do you think you’re doing?!” Shige demanded incredulously.
“Battling savages?”
“What?”
“I’m Jin Smith, what’s your name?”
Shige sat up, scooting back to put space between them, “Shigehontas.”
“Eh? That’s too long!”
“You…you can call me Shige then.”
“So, tell me Shige,” Jin began as he invaded the others personal space, pressing him back onto the sand as he hovered above him, “You guys got any gold around here?”
¬¬¬¬
When Jin got back to his camp he was feeling a lot better about having to deal with Governor Tegoshi on this voyage; at least there was something to make up for it now. He looked around him at all of his comrades, laughing and telling jokes, they seemed much livelier than they had before.
“OI, Smith! You missed out on a damn good fight!” Murakami called out to him.
“We got to ward off some savages; it was an epic battle.” Subaru followed up.
“You know they don’t have any gold right?” jin stated casually, “I met one, I know.”
“Clearly you were lied to. “Tegoshi’s voice pervaded the air, “Why would they admit to having gold?”
“I find people will say all sorts of things when you let them put their dick in you.” Jin shrugged.
Tegoshi glared as Jin sauntered past. Turning to Junnos he whispered, “Follow him, and don’t let him out of your sight. They’ve obviously blinded him with sex.”
“Yes sir!” Junnos saluted.
¬
Ryo watched as Shige took off to meet that stranger that he seemed to have become so infatuated with, glaring hard at the back of his friends head.
“Oh fuck this, that moron is going to get himself hurt.”
He barged into Pipium’s wigwam, not bothering with pleasantries such as asking permission.
“Oi, dumbass! Get your head out of your ass and go fight for your man, he’s off fucking one of those strangers!”
Ryo felt quite pleased with himself as he left through the buffalo skin flap. Somebody had to be looking out for that boy, and Ryo wasn’t about to go get himself killed when he could just send somebody with more muscles to do it.
Jin Smith lay under the branches of a great big willow tree, talking to Shigehontas. “So, I tried talking to my men and telling them we’re wasting our time, but they’re a bunch of idiots.”
Shige snorted derisively but chose not to comment on that statement. Instead he allowed Jin to trail kisses along his neck, occasionally biting at the tender flesh or running his tongue up and along the shell of his ear. He turned his head to steal a proper kiss just before they heard an outraged cry.
“Shigehontas, get away from him!”
Shige turned to see Pipium rush into the clearing and pull Jin away from him. The two began fighting, throwing punches and wrestling around the clearing. Shige tried to protest, to get Pipium to stop, because there was clearly no way the Jin could ever win a fight against Pi’s much more muscular build. He froze when the sound of gunfire filled the clearing; eyes open in terror as Pipium’s body slumped forward, limply falling onto Jin. Turning his head, he saw a tall blonde man holding a musket and looking even more frightened then Shige felt.
“Junnos!” Jin exclaimed, “What the hell are you doing?”
“I…He….I was saving you! He isn’t……..” Junnos gulped
“Yes he’s dead you nitwit!” Shige exclaimed, trying to attack the man, only to be held back by Jin, “You shot him, what did you think was going to happen?!”
“Shige, stop. It’s just Junnos, he never means any real harm, attacking him won’t help.” Jin tried to reason with him before turning to Junnos, “You’d better get out of here before others show up!”
Ryo was glaring at Shige from across the room, looking thoroughly unimpressed by the depressed way he was moping about. What the hell, he was only trying to keep the boy out of trouble, he wasn’t supposed to feel like he’d just ripped the kid’s heart out and eaten it for dinner. He growled when the sound of Shige heaving a weary sigh reached his ears.
“God damn it, what’s the big deal! Those men are all out to kill us, how can you be so fucking hung up on one of them.”
“He’s not like that Ryo, he’s peaceful for the most part. And Pipium was only trying to protect me, and now he’s dead and Jin Smith will be dead soon too!”
“Oh for fuck sake, come with me!” Ryo grabbed Shige’s wrist and dragged him out into the chilly night air. He pulled him over to the wigwam that Jin was being held captive in, telling the guard that Shige wanted to “get a look at the fucker who’d killed his betrothed’s face” before shoving Shige through the flap.
Shige’s eyes instantly landed on Jin Smith, tied to the pole in the center of the room. He ran to the man, falling into his lap and kissing him like it was the last thing he’d ever do. If he only had this one last night with his love, he was going to make it the best night that Jin had ever known.
When the guards came at dawn to take Jin Smith to his execution Shige stayed sitting demurely where he was; he didn’t want to be there to see the brutal act when it happened. As he sat there mourning the loss of his love, the wind blowing through his hair he could almost swear that he could hear Yoko Willow’s voice, “Listen with your heart, you will understand.”
Shige’s eyes widened. That was it! The spinning arrow in his dreams. What else could it have been pointing to, there was nothing like it around his village. Jin and his people were certainly different, and he could think of nothing that rotated quite like Jin’s hips when they were alone together. If that wasn’t what his dream was telling him, then he didn’t know what else it could be.
He stood up, quickly taking off out of the wigwam, tripping only slightly in his haste. He prayed to the spirits to make him swift, this was one time that he could certainly do without his clumsy bad luck. As he drew closer to the cliff where the execution was taking place he could see his father raising his club to strike and spill Jin’s brains all over the pretty rock that he lay upon. Lunging, Shige threw himself on top of Jin, protecting him from any blows as he screamed.
“Stop! If you kill him you’ll have to kill me too!”
“Shigehontas, move aside!” Massu ordered.
“No father, I love him! All of this violence could be avoided if you would just sit down and talk!”
Massu stared down at his son as he protected the man that he loved, and slowly lowered his club.
Shigehontas knelt beside Jin Smith as his men got ready to carry him onto their ship. He lay bandaged on a make-shift stretcher, a gunshot wound in his chest.
“I don’t know how you managed to get hit, you weren’t saving anyone, that shot was too wide to have ended up anywhere near my father.” Shige admonished, “How the hell did you get hit?”
“Slipped on a pebble I guess.”