(no subject)

[rouge_star]

wtf;
this isn't suppose to hurt me like this.
im perfectly happy with my boyfriend.
yet i talk to you after three months of being over and done with;
and it kills me to hear your with someone new.
how does that make sense?
i know i like my boyfriend sooo much.
but the problem is;
i saw myself getting old with you?
i did; but the way it ended was sooo dry.
no closure on my part at all.
i know im happy with my boyfriend;
and God only knows how my self esteem would be if i was with YOU.
i didn't want to have sex and you didn't understand.
"im not giving myself to someone who doesn't want to commit to me.
im definatly not asking for marriage, but it takes a lot more then just
saying were "together, nothing official", to make it happen."
k ashley shut up now.
you know your happy.
very happy infact ....
its just crazy how life works sometimes isn't it??
its not even a thought proccess of me wishing things were different.
everything happens for a reason;
and im glad it did.

here comes me calming down;
breathing in;
breathing out.
i closed your msn box,
and im talking to my love now.
it makes me smile again;
i stop freaking out.
and now you stop reading this and wonder
how im mentally retarded.