Blotto
Herr von Prinsheregenshtrassefahradgescheft ish shtill shleeping, zhe old goat. Hashn't got up from hish mid-internoon afterlude. I believe he'sh blotto. Meanwhile I've been having a few myshelf, ash I lishten to Por Una Cabeza and entertain zhe uzhual fantazhiesh about Richlain Chamberlard'sh hot lipsh. Goshesh, zhoz'are lipsh ash we didn't have back home in Delaware! Shpeaking of which, I musht have my driver'sh lishenshe renewed, fuck it. But if I do it back home in Delaware, zhe bashtards will inshisht on impozhing on my absholutely fashinating shelf a lishenshe in witch zhe wicked which of zhe north will have my name entered ash Timothy Randolph Braithwaite, fuck it. I'd betcher take a new one right here in Pouqueville, where I know zhe chief of polishe. We have even had our daysh of danshing Por Una Cabeza in zhe backyard of zhe fucking polishe shtation. Por Una Cabeeeeeeeeeeeeza ... rrrrrata-tah-tah ... Zhe chick of polishe hash an enoooooooormoush penchant for tangoing. If I ashk him, he will mosht shurely shee to it zhat my new lishenshe readsh, "Bearer: T. R. Braithwaite, née La Gorda." Zhen I will be able to shay to people zhat my name ish Theodosia Rosita Braithwaite, alsho known ash Rosita La Gorda. Yesh, I shink I'd betcher shpeak to zhe shit of polishe. On zhe other hand, Herr Fahradvonshtrasseregenteprinsheetahsheetahboomboom mushn't know a shing about zhis, lesht he will make a shene, zhe way he did in Timbuktu when I ash much ash shmiled to zhat honcho of a truck driver who had jusht cauzhed shuch a hullabaloo at zhe hotel by burshting intcho zhe premishesh and parking hish enoooooooooooormoush truck right in zhe middle of zhe reshepshion room. He'd had a few and one tchoo many, poor shing. Anyway, I'll shink about zhat tchomorrow when I'm back in Tara. Home. I'll go home. And I'll shink of shome way tcho get him pookie back on zhat fucking bush. After all, tchomorrow ish another day.
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