realmof_themuse February
prompt 2009.9.b.8
You don’t know what you’ve got, till it’s gone.
But that isn't true. I always knew what I had. It might not have seen me back in the same way, but I always knew. I was completely aware of how much I loved him and why, just how desperately I had come to rely on him and everything about him, everything that came up and surrounded me, took me in for what it was and what it wasn't. I knew what was going to happen in my life in the sense that I was never going to want to be without him, but I wasn't even sure myself if I'd get that kind of luxury, that kind of chance.
Maybe, though, I didn't completely understand how impossibly painful it would be for me when he was gone. I didn't let myself think there'd be forever, even though that's what I wanted, because he'd told me more than once that forever was an impossible thing to hope for and that I'd never be able to stay with him for the rest of his life. But I did want it, I did think it was possible, and I didn't realize the way my world would shift off balance when reality crashed head onward into me.
I should have thought about it more, but I didn't want to. I just wanted what everyone wants - the chance to be happy with someone that I love.
And I had it. At least, for a little while.
Muse: Rose Tyler
Fandom: Doctor Who
Word Count: 230