dont ever let anyone make you feel like you dont deserve what you want
CHOICE is an illusion ceated by those with power and those without.
"this is your life and its ending one minute at a time" im scared of that. scared of not doing what i want to do. of not doing what i need to do. maybe thats why this year has been chaos. you know how swim coaches would say jump feet first to avoid shock well i basically dove in the water head first...and belly flopped. and my stomach is very very red...so i have to climb back up and jump back in...the right way.
i was given a second chance by her tonight and she honestly did save my life i believe. not from my parents. but from myself. i dont want to let her down or have her feel like she didnt make a difference- cuz she did...a HUGE one. im done with emotional responses to shit that doesnt matter. im done with trying to prove myself to myself. i dont want to be a statistic...i want to fulfill my full potential. even though it may not be anything special i should atleast try...
dont fear death, rather the unlived life, you dont have to live forever you just have to live
-i want to be someone who has sooo many amazing stories to tell their kids that they cant even remember half of them...the memories will just be there happily in the back of my mind. and i will be able to know that ive lived every moment i could...with its full potential! i refuse to disappoint my self. someone else will have to do it for me...if they dare.
"this is your life and its ending one minute at a time" im scared of that. scared of not doing what i want to do. of not doing what i need to do. maybe thats why this year has been chaos. you know how swim coaches would say jump feet first to avoid shock well i basically dove in the water head first...and belly flopped. and my stomach is very very red...so i have to climb back up and jump back in...the right way.
i was given a second chance by her tonight and she honestly did save my life i believe. not from my parents. but from myself. i dont want to let her down or have her feel like she didnt make a difference- cuz she did...a HUGE one. im done with emotional responses to shit that doesnt matter. im done with trying to prove myself to myself. i dont want to be a statistic...i want to fulfill my full potential. even though it may not be anything special i should atleast try...
dont fear death, rather the unlived life, you dont have to live forever you just have to live
-i want to be someone who has sooo many amazing stories to tell their kids that they cant even remember half of them...the memories will just be there happily in the back of my mind. and i will be able to know that ive lived every moment i could...with its full potential! i refuse to disappoint my self. someone else will have to do it for me...if they dare.