(no subject)
CURTAIN RODS
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things .
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their
beautiful dining room table by candle-light,
put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp,
a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water .
When she had finished, she went into each
and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods.
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned
with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
Then slowly, the house began to smell .
They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out .
Vents we re checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned .
Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in
to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a
few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive
wool carpeting.
Nothing worked!!!
People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit .
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they
could not find a buyer for their stinky house .
Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to
return their calls
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to
purchase a new place .
The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going .
He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely
and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing
to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on
a price that was about 1/10 th of what the house had been worth,
but only if she were to sign the papers that very day .
She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork .
A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they
watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new
home........
And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the the curtain rods!
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things .
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their
beautiful dining room table by candle-light,
put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp,
a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water .
When she had finished, she went into each
and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods.
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned
with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
Then slowly, the house began to smell .
They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out .
Vents we re checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned .
Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in
to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a
few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive
wool carpeting.
Nothing worked!!!
People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit .
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they
could not find a buyer for their stinky house .
Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to
return their calls
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to
purchase a new place .
The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going .
He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely
and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing
to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on
a price that was about 1/10 th of what the house had been worth,
but only if she were to sign the papers that very day .
She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork .
A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they
watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new
home........
And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the the curtain rods!