Smile On His Lips and Cuts On His Hips (26/?)

[rose682]

Title: Smile On His Lips and Cuts On His Hips (26/?)
Author: Rose Rose682
Rating: nc-17
Pairing: Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth
Summary: I’d lost count of how many had gaped at my arm with shocked expressions and open mouths, curious people unsure of whether or not they wanted to know the answer asking, “Did you cut your arm?”
Disclaimer: I own neither ATL or

Comments

[rose682]

like ive said, im more of a scientific person and have never been able to believe that the universe is completely controlled by some higher power. my dads christian, so i know a bit about it and go to church occasionally, but i certainly wouldnt consider myself to be the same. and no, dont worry about that at all, im definitely not offended. it would be stupid for me to be annoyed just because you believe something different from me. (as a side note, though, some ideas of certain religions do piss me off. my dads catholic and i recently discovered through him that apparently committing suicide is a sin that automatically grants people a pass to hell, which i think is completely idiotic. but, you know, i couldnt care less if my dad believes thats true. its his decision, right? yours too.)
i think i get what youre saying with that, and its a lovely idea. i wish that i could believe that everything has a reason and is all somehow contributing to the greater good, but ive always been one of those people who cant possibly see the benefit of mindless war and senseless cruelty. thats obviously a far greater issue than something like having a friend ditch you (not to make your issues and grievances sound trivial, i completely understand how the little things can seem devastating and lead to something much worse) but i cant find it in me to imagine how that could ever be justified in any way. id love to think that all the seemingly pointless shit that happens to me and all the innocent people of the world had a good purpose, and i see how thats a very comforting idea, but i suppose im too technical for that. i figure that things just happen because they do, theres no point, this is only how nature works. which is slightly depressing in its own way, but oh well. ive been wondering what the point is a lot lately, and from what i can tell, there isnt one. maybe my dad shouldve raised me religiously so i wouldnt have to doubt the point of all this, itd be nice.

this is actually awesome though, basically the reason why i write things like this is because ive never had anyone who was willing to talk to me about it. actually discussing the random stuff that plagues my mind is an even more effective way to clear it out, so thank you, i really appreciate it. and i hope i am rational, if anything. one of my very few assets (i think, at least) is that i can usually evaluate the facts of things and form opinions on them from that.
my mind is especially scrambled lately and i feel like this is probably an insufficient response, but i dont really have the mental capacity to string together something better currently. but i guess its genuine, which you said is good, right? and youre seriously awesome too, your comments are some of my favorites <3