Article: Times Online
On Wayne Rooney’s birthday, our correspondent finds 21 reasons why the Manchester United forward should be celebrating
1. HE MAY have worn a T-shirt stating “Once a Blue, Always a Blue”, but he craftily avoided having the words tattooed on his arm
2. He may not be very well educated but his views on life, the universe and chewing gum were worth a £5 million advance from HarperCollins
3. We may snigger at his nickname of Shrek, but Shrek is a great film. Better than being likened to Barney, the purple dinosaur
4. He may have chosen the location for his home as he thought the local pub was called the Admiral Rooney ( it was called the Admiral Rodney), but his house cost £4 million so who cares what the pubs are called?
5. Before Rooney became the youngest player to represent England, that record was held by James F M Prinsep, who played for Clapham Rovers in 1879, and if it hadn’t been for Wayne we wouldn’t have known that. Rooney’s record lasted little over three years, though, lost to Theo Walcott
6. On April 29, 2006, Rooney depressed the nation by breaking his metatarsal but then he cheered it up again by being pronounced injury-free and on course for World Cup duty on June 8
7. He runs on average 11.5km per match - no one can say if this is clever or stupid, as we do not yet think in terms of kilometres nor judge footballers on the distances they run
8. A pub in Devon was renamed the Half Roon instead of the Half Moon. How many pubs are called the Einstein’s Head or indeed the Dog and Pelé?
9. Sven-Göran Eriksson compared Rooney to Pelé - it was the only interesting thing he did say
10. Not many players are famed for their interpretation of events. Rooney was once sent off for the sarcastic manner in which he applauded a decision by Kim Milton Nielsen, the referee. He was not sent off for plain dissent.
11. Rooney looked foolish when his weakness for older prostitutes was exposed in the tabloids. On the other hand, he has won £100,000 in libel damages from them in his time
12. His favourite TV show is Only Fools and Horses - hence the understandable mix-up over Rodney and Rooney
13. He was sent off when representing his country in the 2006 World Cup finals but by making sure he was the third player to do this, no one was much bothered.
14. He chewed gum and said next to nothing when he received the BBC Young Sports Personality of the Year award in 2002, but then he did manage to win it on the basis of one goal against Arsenal
15. The English Schools FA dropped him as a guest speaker on the grounds that he was “not a good role model”, but who has ever heard of the ESFA? Everyone knows Wayne Rooney
16. Sepp Blatter, the Fifa president, said Rooney needs a clip round the ear for his bad language, but nobody believes anything Blatter says is reasonable or sensible.
17. He is not as good as Eric Cantona. On the other hand Cantona says Wayne is too good to be compared to anyone. Even him
18. Wayne has not got the voice of an angel, but Jake Shears from Scissor Sisters thinks he is “so sexy”. Which is cooler than being lusted after by Barbra Streisand
19. He received more bookings than he scored goals in his last season at Everton but that did not stop United paying £31 million for him
20. He grew a nasty beard. But then he shaved it off
21. Wayne scored a hat-trick on his debut for Manchester United in a Champions League tie against Fenerbahçe. And, er, well, we’d all like to score a hat-trick in Europe on our debut, but mostly we don’t
Link here
All the picspammy goodness should be here soon on my behalf. Except, I'm trying to figure out which aspect to tackle first. I have 11 different folders my Rooney picspam pictures are split into so I'll leave a list and please tell me which you'd like to see first?
Casual, England!Rooney, Everton!Rooney, Man U!Roonz, Rockz (Roonz/Becks), Roonaldo (Wayne/Cris), Alan/Wayne, Other Slashy Roonz, The Look, With Colleen, and then the WTF/Random folder. Lots, yes?
1. HE MAY have worn a T-shirt stating “Once a Blue, Always a Blue”, but he craftily avoided having the words tattooed on his arm
2. He may not be very well educated but his views on life, the universe and chewing gum were worth a £5 million advance from HarperCollins
3. We may snigger at his nickname of Shrek, but Shrek is a great film. Better than being likened to Barney, the purple dinosaur
4. He may have chosen the location for his home as he thought the local pub was called the Admiral Rooney ( it was called the Admiral Rodney), but his house cost £4 million so who cares what the pubs are called?
5. Before Rooney became the youngest player to represent England, that record was held by James F M Prinsep, who played for Clapham Rovers in 1879, and if it hadn’t been for Wayne we wouldn’t have known that. Rooney’s record lasted little over three years, though, lost to Theo Walcott
6. On April 29, 2006, Rooney depressed the nation by breaking his metatarsal but then he cheered it up again by being pronounced injury-free and on course for World Cup duty on June 8
7. He runs on average 11.5km per match - no one can say if this is clever or stupid, as we do not yet think in terms of kilometres nor judge footballers on the distances they run
8. A pub in Devon was renamed the Half Roon instead of the Half Moon. How many pubs are called the Einstein’s Head or indeed the Dog and Pelé?
9. Sven-Göran Eriksson compared Rooney to Pelé - it was the only interesting thing he did say
10. Not many players are famed for their interpretation of events. Rooney was once sent off for the sarcastic manner in which he applauded a decision by Kim Milton Nielsen, the referee. He was not sent off for plain dissent.
11. Rooney looked foolish when his weakness for older prostitutes was exposed in the tabloids. On the other hand, he has won £100,000 in libel damages from them in his time
12. His favourite TV show is Only Fools and Horses - hence the understandable mix-up over Rodney and Rooney
13. He was sent off when representing his country in the 2006 World Cup finals but by making sure he was the third player to do this, no one was much bothered.
14. He chewed gum and said next to nothing when he received the BBC Young Sports Personality of the Year award in 2002, but then he did manage to win it on the basis of one goal against Arsenal
15. The English Schools FA dropped him as a guest speaker on the grounds that he was “not a good role model”, but who has ever heard of the ESFA? Everyone knows Wayne Rooney
16. Sepp Blatter, the Fifa president, said Rooney needs a clip round the ear for his bad language, but nobody believes anything Blatter says is reasonable or sensible.
17. He is not as good as Eric Cantona. On the other hand Cantona says Wayne is too good to be compared to anyone. Even him
18. Wayne has not got the voice of an angel, but Jake Shears from Scissor Sisters thinks he is “so sexy”. Which is cooler than being lusted after by Barbra Streisand
19. He received more bookings than he scored goals in his last season at Everton but that did not stop United paying £31 million for him
20. He grew a nasty beard. But then he shaved it off
21. Wayne scored a hat-trick on his debut for Manchester United in a Champions League tie against Fenerbahçe. And, er, well, we’d all like to score a hat-trick in Europe on our debut, but mostly we don’t
Link here
All the picspammy goodness should be here soon on my behalf. Except, I'm trying to figure out which aspect to tackle first. I have 11 different folders my Rooney picspam pictures are split into so I'll leave a list and please tell me which you'd like to see first?
Casual, England!Rooney, Everton!Rooney, Man U!Roonz, Rockz (Roonz/Becks), Roonaldo (Wayne/Cris), Alan/Wayne, Other Slashy Roonz, The Look, With Colleen, and then the WTF/Random folder. Lots, yes?