just this year i've had friends who've lost other friends, and friends who've lost family. and each time it happens to someone else, i can feel it happening to me all over again
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I wish I could have been there in a better way for you then mercedes, god I kick myself all the time for it. I was a stupid, self absorbed 9th grader at the time who was so wrapped up in my social life that I was just too..I don't know...I didn't think very logically and I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you better. Here I am, probably one of the few that has known you your whole life, and your family, and I wasn't there. I'm sorry. I really am.
But don't worry hun, I do remember. Obviously not the way that you do, but I do remember. I just don't know how to approach the situation because you didn't talk about it much ever again. I also wish I could say that I don't understand ...but after these last few weeks...after Joe...even though it's not the same because he wasn't my family, it hit me as if he was. I didn't know such pain was possible to feel. You put the feelings so vividly. So very well. It's so hard with people not understanding, isn't it? It's not their fault, like you said. but it's hard. It's like there is this little thing haunting you and it comes back every once and awhile, and its permanent. There are always those questions and mysteries left unanswered for the rest of our time here on earth. Sweetie...I know now. I wish i didn't know, and its different because of what happened to Joe obviously and the fact that he was a friend, not family, but I know pretty well now. And now my thanksgiving and birthday will never really be the same. I love you. and I am empty too. Lets be empty together. <3
But don't worry hun, I do remember. Obviously not the way that you do, but I do remember. I just don't know how to approach the situation because you didn't talk about it much ever again.
I also wish I could say that I don't understand ...but after these last few weeks...after Joe...even though it's not the same because he wasn't my family, it hit me as if he was. I didn't know such pain was possible to feel.
You put the feelings so vividly. So very well. It's so hard with people not understanding, isn't it? It's not their fault, like you said. but it's hard. It's like there is this little thing haunting you and it comes back every once and awhile, and its permanent.
There are always those questions and mysteries left unanswered for the rest of our time here on earth.
Sweetie...I know now. I wish i didn't know, and its different because of what happened to Joe obviously and the fact that he was a friend, not family, but I know pretty well now. And now my thanksgiving and birthday will never really be the same.
I love you. and I am empty too. Lets be empty together. <3
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