. . . . next?

[roninangel]

at this point i must move on - no i don't mean i'm leaving LJ - i just mean that i can no longer keep continuing to fight against what has been happening with mike and i - in the beginning things were really good - but then life started throwing stuff at us and the differences in the way we approach a relationship began to really become apparent - the more we tried to make things work, the less they actually seemed to - starting in may of this year, we've basically just been on-and-off - this must end - i'm not saying i didn't make my fair share of mistakes - what i'm saying is that we both did (though at this time he has yet to admit to any) - he had one foot out the door since may and didn't seem to appreciate the steps i was taking to fix things - i stopped trying so hard when i wasn't seeing an equal amount of effort and i kept trying to hold on harder when all he wanted was some space - there are a lot more things that could be said here - in the end, the point is that i love him like crazy and always will, but this is no way to have a relationship and trying to force it is just not working

this sounds so much to me like i'm just saying things to make myself feel better - but i truly mean it when i say this is what needs to happen - mike is not right for me - he has been MORE right than anyone i've been with - but still not right enough - and at least i'm not making the same mistakes over and over again

what it comes down to is this: i deserve to find the right fit