Chapter 3 - Something walks into a bar.....
A wanderer carrying a duffel bag walks into a bar.
He sits by the bar, puts down his bag, and asks for a drink.
"Give me something hard."
"Hmph. Define hard."
The bartender was obviously annoyed.
"Fine. Milk. With sake, hot sauce, and a shot of espresso. And...sugar."
Now the bartender was intrigued.
"This will taste like shit."
"I don't mind."
"Not just any shit. Imagine the fattest mother-fucker that has ever graced the fine streets of Shinjuku, ate the most god-awful things in the world, and shit them all-"
"I said I don't mind. Just give it to me."
The bartender gives a defiant snort, but gives it to the man anyway. He gulped it all down in one swallow.
"A fucking shot glass?! Give it to me in a mug! A fricking mug! I'll pay you double."
"You don't have to swear you little shit! If you want to die that badly, fine!"
The wanderer smiled a half-smile.
An hour or so into the wanderer's drinking spree, he has chased all the customers out of the bar with a drunken stupor that would put the most hardcore drunkards to shame. The bartender was too scared to tell the man to piss off, so he just shut up.
Amidst the disquiet, a rather tall man with a lanky frame and the eyes of a snake, walks into the bar. He looked like a weakling, but appearances can be deceiving. The thin man sat next to the wanderer.
"What will you have?" the bartender asked.
"Whatever my good friend is having."
The bartender gave another snort, and set about doing his business.
"I have finally found you, Last Scion."
The wanderer, miracously, seems to have sobered up.
"Pfeh."
"I won't kill you of course. No, I believe that I shall leave it up to my master."
The thin man grinned. It was not a nice grin. It was the kind of grin that executioners show to the people they're about to murder in the name of "justice."
"Why the fuck are you in the form of man?"
"It is easier to get around, people don't ask me about the protruding horns, wings on my waist-"
"Your pleasing breath."
The bartender gave the thin man his drink and proceeded to go about doing what he was previously doing, which was nothing.
"No need for insults. I have nothing against you, but it is just the will of my Mistress."
"You can tell that bitch Tiamat that she can go back to Oblivion. I'll do the whore a favor and send her there myself!"
The thin man chuckled.
"You cannot possibly hope to stand against my Mistress' wrath. When I finally tell her your location, all hell will break lose, all manner of torture will seethe into your soul until the only thing left is that husk of yours."
"Why don't you just tell her now with a spell or some shit?"
"That is none of your business."
The wanderer smiled a half-smile. The game was already over.
"Why is my body so important? Why the fuck don't you guys just leave me the fuck alone?"
"Because your body is a vessel to be used. Your human soul cannot hope to fathom the soul OUR kind should possess. We will cast your soul into the abyss, and your body is to be used by our Mistress."
"Tiamat. That bitch."
"I am curious though.....why do you not beat me to a bloody pulp right now? I believe that was your...default response to threats and danger?"
The wanderer sighed, gulped his drink, and sighed again.
"Truth to tell....I am tired of all this chasing. I am tired of running around."
He stared hard at the thin man.
"I want it to be over. Tell her that so we could finish this."
The thin man almost looked sympathetic, but he grinned at the prospect of having been the one to tell his Mistress where the Last Scion was, begging for it to all end. He was going to be rewarded with unimaginable pleasure. He salivitates
"I will do it right away."
"But first, can we have a toast?"
"Why should we have a toast?"
"To commend YOUR victory good Lpeinz. It is the least I can do. Don't you get a reward for my capture and all that shit?"
"Why...yes, yes I do get a reward."
"Why don't we start it off with a drink? This is one of the best hard drinks in the human world! Only the best for 'capturing the elusive Last Scion' am I right?"
"Yes, yes of course! The Mistress shall reward me, pitiful Scion! Hahahahahahahahahahahhahaha-"
The thin man was full of himself.
"To you good Lpeinz!" The man shoved the drink to the demon's hand. "To your success and the end of my misery!"
The vagabond said this with much gusto.
"Yes! YES! TO MY REWARD!"
The thin guzzled it all down like a bat out of hell, which is of course a very bad idea since he has a body possessing the constitution of an hour old baby mouse.
The demon wiped his mouth.
"HAHAHAHAHA! DESPAIR MORT-"
The thin man then convulsed violently, his body cracking down under the combined, instantaneous forces of alcohol, milk, caffiene, glucose and wasabi. He coughed a mouthful of blood, stared at the "Last Scion" who was looking rather pleased with himself.
"Goodbye Lpeinz. Say 'hi' to Tiamat for me. She'll be so fucking pissed wouldn't she? Oh shit, you let the Last Scion kill you! OH SHIT, YOU LET HIM GET AWAY!"
The thin man looked at the wanderer incredously before falling down to the ground.
The wanderer gave him the finger.
The thin man was dead, his body still convulsing.
The bartender was stunned.
"Bartender!"
"Y-y-yes?"
"Inside this duffel bag is cash. 5 million dollars to be exact. Do not tell anyone about this."
"B-b-b-but what about the body?"
The wanderer paid for his drinks, and gave the waiter a generous tip.
"What body?"
The wanderer walks out of the bar, smiling a half-smile.
The bartender nervously looks down the bar to see the body of the demon.
But there was nothing there.
He sits by the bar, puts down his bag, and asks for a drink.
"Give me something hard."
"Hmph. Define hard."
The bartender was obviously annoyed.
"Fine. Milk. With sake, hot sauce, and a shot of espresso. And...sugar."
Now the bartender was intrigued.
"This will taste like shit."
"I don't mind."
"Not just any shit. Imagine the fattest mother-fucker that has ever graced the fine streets of Shinjuku, ate the most god-awful things in the world, and shit them all-"
"I said I don't mind. Just give it to me."
The bartender gives a defiant snort, but gives it to the man anyway. He gulped it all down in one swallow.
"A fucking shot glass?! Give it to me in a mug! A fricking mug! I'll pay you double."
"You don't have to swear you little shit! If you want to die that badly, fine!"
The wanderer smiled a half-smile.
An hour or so into the wanderer's drinking spree, he has chased all the customers out of the bar with a drunken stupor that would put the most hardcore drunkards to shame. The bartender was too scared to tell the man to piss off, so he just shut up.
Amidst the disquiet, a rather tall man with a lanky frame and the eyes of a snake, walks into the bar. He looked like a weakling, but appearances can be deceiving. The thin man sat next to the wanderer.
"What will you have?" the bartender asked.
"Whatever my good friend is having."
The bartender gave another snort, and set about doing his business.
"I have finally found you, Last Scion."
The wanderer, miracously, seems to have sobered up.
"Pfeh."
"I won't kill you of course. No, I believe that I shall leave it up to my master."
The thin man grinned. It was not a nice grin. It was the kind of grin that executioners show to the people they're about to murder in the name of "justice."
"Why the fuck are you in the form of man?"
"It is easier to get around, people don't ask me about the protruding horns, wings on my waist-"
"Your pleasing breath."
The bartender gave the thin man his drink and proceeded to go about doing what he was previously doing, which was nothing.
"No need for insults. I have nothing against you, but it is just the will of my Mistress."
"You can tell that bitch Tiamat that she can go back to Oblivion. I'll do the whore a favor and send her there myself!"
The thin man chuckled.
"You cannot possibly hope to stand against my Mistress' wrath. When I finally tell her your location, all hell will break lose, all manner of torture will seethe into your soul until the only thing left is that husk of yours."
"Why don't you just tell her now with a spell or some shit?"
"That is none of your business."
The wanderer smiled a half-smile. The game was already over.
"Why is my body so important? Why the fuck don't you guys just leave me the fuck alone?"
"Because your body is a vessel to be used. Your human soul cannot hope to fathom the soul OUR kind should possess. We will cast your soul into the abyss, and your body is to be used by our Mistress."
"Tiamat. That bitch."
"I am curious though.....why do you not beat me to a bloody pulp right now? I believe that was your...default response to threats and danger?"
The wanderer sighed, gulped his drink, and sighed again.
"Truth to tell....I am tired of all this chasing. I am tired of running around."
He stared hard at the thin man.
"I want it to be over. Tell her that so we could finish this."
The thin man almost looked sympathetic, but he grinned at the prospect of having been the one to tell his Mistress where the Last Scion was, begging for it to all end. He was going to be rewarded with unimaginable pleasure. He salivitates
"I will do it right away."
"But first, can we have a toast?"
"Why should we have a toast?"
"To commend YOUR victory good Lpeinz. It is the least I can do. Don't you get a reward for my capture and all that shit?"
"Why...yes, yes I do get a reward."
"Why don't we start it off with a drink? This is one of the best hard drinks in the human world! Only the best for 'capturing the elusive Last Scion' am I right?"
"Yes, yes of course! The Mistress shall reward me, pitiful Scion! Hahahahahahahahahahahhahaha-"
The thin man was full of himself.
"To you good Lpeinz!" The man shoved the drink to the demon's hand. "To your success and the end of my misery!"
The vagabond said this with much gusto.
"Yes! YES! TO MY REWARD!"
The thin guzzled it all down like a bat out of hell, which is of course a very bad idea since he has a body possessing the constitution of an hour old baby mouse.
The demon wiped his mouth.
"HAHAHAHAHA! DESPAIR MORT-"
The thin man then convulsed violently, his body cracking down under the combined, instantaneous forces of alcohol, milk, caffiene, glucose and wasabi. He coughed a mouthful of blood, stared at the "Last Scion" who was looking rather pleased with himself.
"Goodbye Lpeinz. Say 'hi' to Tiamat for me. She'll be so fucking pissed wouldn't she? Oh shit, you let the Last Scion kill you! OH SHIT, YOU LET HIM GET AWAY!"
The thin man looked at the wanderer incredously before falling down to the ground.
The wanderer gave him the finger.
The thin man was dead, his body still convulsing.
The bartender was stunned.
"Bartender!"
"Y-y-yes?"
"Inside this duffel bag is cash. 5 million dollars to be exact. Do not tell anyone about this."
"B-b-b-but what about the body?"
The wanderer paid for his drinks, and gave the waiter a generous tip.
"What body?"
The wanderer walks out of the bar, smiling a half-smile.
The bartender nervously looks down the bar to see the body of the demon.
But there was nothing there.