As if in a dream...
am i supposed to be happy
when all i ever wanted, it comes with a price
There's a point in everyone's life when they become nostalgic and develop a want for their long dead past. For me, that point has extended for over a year. I look back on all the things that happened after high school, and I wish and pray that there would be some way, any way, for me to change some of the bad things.
I look at old friends I had back then that were really close..and now I haven't talked to them in over a year. I read through all of my old LJ entries today and it made me really depressed because all of those people are nonexistent in my life now. And the sad part is...that they won't want to be a part of it anymore. They have no idea how bad it's tearing me up inside just by thinking about it. It dismantles my sanity to the point where I want to rip my insides out just to escape the pain.
In movies it's so simple. A heartfelt speech of how much you miss someone will make them cry and they'll come running back and apologize for ever leaving you.
In real life, it's not that easy. No matter how much you cry, no matter how much you beg and plead them to come back...they don't always come back... And whether or not you know why...they won't change their mind.
I used to think I could change anything in the world that I wanted to. Some day, I dreamed, that I'd have the chance to turn this entire country around and change it for the better.
But it's nothing more than a sad, impossible dream. I can only change myself, and that itself takes years to do.
we made plans to grow old
believe me there was truth in all those stories that i told
lost in a simple game cat and mouse
are we the same people as before this came to light
Broken friendships are the hardest things in the world to fix. Harder than rocket science, brain surgery, or astrophysics. Even going to impossible lengths to attempt to repair them is futile sometimes.
I once said that the most painful feeling in the world is being so close to the person that you love and not being able to tell them or portray any liking at all.
It's not...
It's the feeling of a once-great friendship being ripped into shreds by the other person. It's the feeling of wanting so bad to fix it...and them not letting that happen. It's almost sickening. It's feeling worthless to the person you used to mean everything to...Going from being the one they could talk to anything about to the person that they won't even talk TO.
softly we tremble tonight,
picture perfect fading smiles are all thats left in sight
i said id never leave, youll never change
im not satisfied with where im at in life
you said that you would die for me...
Things that mean the most to you...
If they break...oftentimes can't be fixed.
I miss you...
Please someone respond to this...so that I know there's SOMEONE still out there.
when all i ever wanted, it comes with a price
There's a point in everyone's life when they become nostalgic and develop a want for their long dead past. For me, that point has extended for over a year. I look back on all the things that happened after high school, and I wish and pray that there would be some way, any way, for me to change some of the bad things.
I look at old friends I had back then that were really close..and now I haven't talked to them in over a year. I read through all of my old LJ entries today and it made me really depressed because all of those people are nonexistent in my life now. And the sad part is...that they won't want to be a part of it anymore. They have no idea how bad it's tearing me up inside just by thinking about it. It dismantles my sanity to the point where I want to rip my insides out just to escape the pain.
In movies it's so simple. A heartfelt speech of how much you miss someone will make them cry and they'll come running back and apologize for ever leaving you.
In real life, it's not that easy. No matter how much you cry, no matter how much you beg and plead them to come back...they don't always come back... And whether or not you know why...they won't change their mind.
I used to think I could change anything in the world that I wanted to. Some day, I dreamed, that I'd have the chance to turn this entire country around and change it for the better.
But it's nothing more than a sad, impossible dream. I can only change myself, and that itself takes years to do.
we made plans to grow old
believe me there was truth in all those stories that i told
lost in a simple game cat and mouse
are we the same people as before this came to light
Broken friendships are the hardest things in the world to fix. Harder than rocket science, brain surgery, or astrophysics. Even going to impossible lengths to attempt to repair them is futile sometimes.
I once said that the most painful feeling in the world is being so close to the person that you love and not being able to tell them or portray any liking at all.
It's not...
It's the feeling of a once-great friendship being ripped into shreds by the other person. It's the feeling of wanting so bad to fix it...and them not letting that happen. It's almost sickening. It's feeling worthless to the person you used to mean everything to...Going from being the one they could talk to anything about to the person that they won't even talk TO.
softly we tremble tonight,
picture perfect fading smiles are all thats left in sight
i said id never leave, youll never change
im not satisfied with where im at in life
you said that you would die for me...
Things that mean the most to you...
If they break...oftentimes can't be fixed.
I miss you...
Please someone respond to this...so that I know there's SOMEONE still out there.