Dir en grey - Kaoru/Kyo - The Unexpected Mishap - 5/?
Title: The Unexpected Mishap
Author: shuichin or Shuichi
Genre: Romance/Action/Humor/etc
Pairings: Kaoru/Kyo, among others
Rating: NC-17 overall
Warnings: Sexual content (obviously), language, violence, fluff, Gackt, sillyness beyond your wildest dreams
Summary: AU. Crossover. Mishap: an unfortunate and possibly unforeseen accident; see "hitch."
Notes: I hope you're all pleased! This is a longer chapter, and although there's some angst involved, I rather like it. ^^V
Cast of Characters || About The Series || FANATICAL A fansite! || hitch_fans
Part 5: Hair-Brained Schemes
I sat at home until something like four in the afternoon, feeling sorry for myself for what had happened with Kyo. The worst of it was that I had mixed feelings. I was upset at everyone involved-myself, Kyo, Kirito… Mostly Kirito. Only Kirito. By the time I finally decided to get off my ass and do something, I was totally convinced that Kirito was just a slimy git who should be taken out and hanged.
Aisuru was who got me of the couch; he kept yowling at me and scratching at the door. I realized Kyo hadn’t taken him on his daily walk. So I dug his little kitty leash out of the entryway closet, wondering to myself why Kyo liked such a dog-like cat.
Finally, I was all bundled up, and Aisuru’s collar was fastened to the leash. We said good-bye to Itami-chan (who didn’t even crack an eye open to look at us), and then left the apartment. He bounded down the apartment steps and to the sidewalk, and I allowed him to lead as we went on our merry way. The sun was shining, but it was still very cold. Before long I realized Aisuru was taking us in a very specific direction, though he was sometimes distracted by dogs or small children. I just let him go where he pleased until he stopped in front of a beauty salon called Rocket Dive Salon. He stopped in front of the door, looked over his shoulder at me with wide blue eyes, and announced, “NYA!”
I raised an eyebrow at the salon, and was about to start us back on our merry way again, but then I caught a glimpse of a pink-haired man inside… I gasped and looked down at Aisuru. “No way! How did you do that!?”
“NYA!” He said before heading toward the main door.
Still feeling completely awed and mildly disturbed, I walked up to the door as well, and flung it open. “Hide!” I burst.
He was just finishing up with a customer, but he looked over at me with wide eyes and a sudden grin. “Kaoru! Hi! What’re you doing here?”
I nodded down to the kitten at my feet. Or rather, the kitten prancing all over, trying to get free of the leash so he could explore the salon. “Aisuru brought me here. Since when have you been able to communicate with cats?”
Hide chuckled, and resumed blow-drying his customer’s hair. When he was finished, and had helped the young woman out of her chair, he turned back to me and said, “I don’t talk to them. But we have an innate connection because of…” He paused and looked at the lady, then grinned at me again as he said in a hushed tone: “You know.”
I shook my head, and took a seat in the waiting area, tying the end of Aisuru’s leash to the handle on the chair. He didn’t seem very happy about being restrained, but he soon busied himself by poking around in the magazine bin next to us. I watched as the woman paid Hide, and he thanked her exuberantly before she left. He took off his apron and plopped down in the chair next to me. “It’s been a busy day!” He informed, though he didn’t look too worn out. In fact, he more or less looked pleased that he’d been kept on his toes all day.
I offered him a smile. “I’m glad the salon is doing well.”
A grin lit up his face again, and he turned his head to look at me. “It is! God’s blessing it, isn’t he?”
My smile faltered, and my expression turned to bewilderment. “Hide…well, are you going to be really…religious now? Because it’s a little…weird. And, you know, it might cause problems for you and Yoshiki.”
He frowned at me. “What do you mean: weird? And anyway, I’m not being religious, I just know the true way things are now. Is that so hard to deal with?”
I shook my head. “Well, no, but a lot of people don’t believe in God-especially in Japan. It might be-“
“Oh, that’s rubbish!” He burst, sitting up, and turning his entire body to face me. “Everyone believes in God, whether they realize it or not! Every soul on this earth is searching for something to fill the emptiness in their lives, and even the ones who are atheists are searching for an unknown, God-like entity to fill that space. They just don’t want to call it God.”
I scratched my head, feeling a little awkward. “Er, right, I mean-“
“And-and how do you think it will cause problems between Yoshiki and I?” He gasped, looking alarmed all of a sudden.
I sighed, cursing myself for opening my big, fat mouth. “I don’t know! I just, I mean…well, he’s a little irritated, that’s all. It’s probably nothing.”
But Hide didn’t look like it was nothing. On the contrary, his eyes widened even more and he looked positively mortified. “Are you-are you serious? And you’re sure it has to do with the fact that I believe in God now and read my Bible?”
I wanted to start laughing and joke around about him owning a Bible, but realized this was Hide, not Hideto, and I couldn’t make jokes like that. Especially not while he was so worried about his relationship with Yoshiki because I had to be a complete dumbass and give him reason to. I moved my chair closer to him so I could grab his hand in both of mine. “Hide, you have nothing to worry about. Yoshiki loves you, so any little obstacles you guys face won’t be a hindrance in the end. Love conquers all, right?”
Hide still looked blatantly traumatized, though, and exclaimed, “But religion’s a whole other playing field! What if-“
“BZZZT!” I burst, successfully shutting him up. “Don’t get started with the ‘what if’s’ because they only lead to trouble. I’m the date doctor, and I’m telling you-“
He snorted, and pulled his hand away from both of mine. “No offense, Kaoru, but a title doesn’t mean anything to me.”
My jaw dropped. “What? But what about the countless couples who could tell you I’m the only reason they lived happily ever after?”
He shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t think you should expect people to feel at ease about their relationships just because you can tell them smoothly why there shouldn’t be any problems, and in doing so tack your title to the end of your statement so that they’ll believe you. You’ve been wrong before, after all, and it isn’t fair of you to try to give me false hope when you blatantly told me to be careful of flaunting my religion around Yoshiki for fear of our relationship.”
I stared at him in muted surprise. I hadn’t expected him to go off on me like that, and I was already frustrated enough that when I realized he’d told me off, I snapped harshly, “Well, excuse me for trying to be helpful!” I stood up, getting thoroughly infuriated with Aisuru’s leash as I tried to untie it. “I guess I can’t do any damn thing right, and I’m sick and tired of people getting angry with me when I haven’t even done anything meriting it! First Kyo, now you-“
“NYA!” Aisuru protested when I finally got the leash untangled and started in the direction of the door.
“Oh, you want to pick a fight with me, too!?” I glowered at the kitten. “Fine then, when we get home, you’re GROUNDED.”
“Kaoru,” Hide interjected, stepping close enough to me to grab my arm.
“What!?” I almost roared, feeling dangerously unbalanced.
He glared at me, but quickly wiped the look off of his face so he could replace it with a more sympathetic one. “Well, first of all…you just grounded a cat.”
I blinked several times before coming up with a suitable response: “So?”
He shook his head. “Secondly, I’m sorry if I made you feel like you can’t do anything right. I know that isn’t true.” He offered me his cute smile, and I couldn’t stay mad.
That asshole.
I shrugged, feeling some of my anger leak out. “Well…thanks. I didn’t mean to shout, I’m just having a bad day.”
He nodded. “Which leads me to my third point… What happened with Kyo?”
Well, he didn’t need to ask me twice. We were sitting down again, and Aisuru had finally run out of energy as he slept in Hide’s lap before I finished going over the whole story. This was mostly because I had to shriek and make emphatic hand motions and whine about how life isn’t fair. Because, really, it’s not that long of a story to tell.
Anyway, I was expecting Hide to get after me again, only this time for being a terrible boyfriend. Instead he looked at me thoughtfully and said bluntly, “You take way too much shit from him.”
At first I didn’t know what he meant, but then the answer dawned on me, and I sighed, slumping in defeat. “You’re right. But that’s because I know he could kick my ass. He’s done it before, you know! You were there even! Still, maybe I can take it to my lawyer and we can get a restraining order-“
“What are you talking about?” Hide asked, looking puzzled.
I blinked. “Er, Kirito, duh. Isn’t that who you were talking about?”
He shook his head. “No, I was actually talking about Kyo.”
My mouth fell open in surprise. “You think I take too much shit from Kyo!? I certainly do not! I know when enough is enough and I-“
But Hide was shaking his head before I’d finished the word “certainly.” He sighed and pulled his feet up onto the chair, wrapping his arms around his knees and carefully situating the kitten beside him. “Kaoru, I was a firsthand witness to your relationship, remember? I could write up a long list for you of all the times you let him beat you verbally without so much as standing up for yourself. This morning is no exception to that. Kirito kissed him, and he flipped out at you for no good reason. You’re the only person involved not at fault, as far as I’m concerned.”
I stared. When he put it that way… “Well, I know that,” I defended. “I mean, obviously I’m the one not at fault bec-“
“Then why did you let Kyo make you believe you were?”
I opened and closed my mouth a few times, but no response would come out. That was a very good question! I leaned back in my chair, rubbing my chin uncertainly. It seemed that Kyo had some annoying power over me to make me feel like I was at fault when I wasn’t. Why was it that I always let him have his way? Why was it that I always took his shit-not only that, but I let myself believe he was an innocent angel in the grand scheme of things. “I don’t know,” I said at last.
Hide shook his head, looking almost piteously at me. “I’ll bet it stems from way back when you cheated on him. I’m sorry to bring that up, but I’m sure that’s what started it. You were living in guilt, and he really was the innocent party. Things have changed a lot, though, and you can’t keep letting yourself believe you’re always the guilty one and he’s always the innocent one. I mean, you’re not always innocent either, nor is he always guilty, but that’s my point. It’s neither extreme. I hope I’m making sense…”
Whether he was actually making sense or not didn’t matter. Suddenly a light had turned on in my brain. He was absolutely right. Somehow I had made myself believe that if I didn’t always let Kyo have his way and if I didn’t always bow to his every whim, he would leave me. I needed to stand up for myself more. I needed to have some control over our relationship as much as he did.
I practically jumped up from my chair, and scooped Aisuru up. He yawned and stretched, accidentally clawing my chest, but I didn’t care much at the moment. I all-but slung him over my shoulder and announced to Hide, “Well, Kyo will be back home soon, and I’m going to be waiting for him. You’re damn right, and things are going to change around our apartment!”
Hide jumped up, too. “WAIT! Before you go, can I take care of your split ends? Pretty please?”
I had every intention of saying no and just leaving, but I had to make the mistake of looking over at him. Hide has the best puppy dog eyes you’ve ever seen. I sighed and set Aisuru back down on the chair, tying the end of his leash to the armrest in case he should wake up and decide to go snooping around. “All right, all right…”
“We should do something about your hair color, too,” he said thoughtfully, eyes roving over my head.
I felt oddly self-conscious as I sat down in one of the special chairs, and allowed him to cover my clothes up. “Erm…no, I think just a trim-“
“But Kaoru, your roots are showing!” He said sharply, as though that sort of thing were a crime against humanity. “You look ridiculous! It would be awful of me to leave your hair the way it is! And you know, that color makes you look sort of silly. I doubt Kyo will be able to take you seriously if you’re running around like something that escaped from the circus!”
I gasped at his words. “You know, that’s really high of you to say, Mr. Pink Hair!”
But then he glared at me in the mirror, and I realized that I could take him seriously with pink hair. Meanwhile, I looked like a big, goofy dork sitting there in front of him. He was right, too: my roots were showing, and they made it all worse. All in all, I had a sort of frumpy look about me, and that was completely unattractive. All of a sudden I found myself retching at the sight of myself. “You’re right! I’M UGLY!” I wailed.
He petted my hair and said soothingly, “No, but you would look much better with a natural hair color…”
* * * * *
The salon was least busy in the evening, so Hide didn’t have many more visitors. By seven he was closing up shop, pondering the day’s events to himself. First there had been that impossibly adorable young man who’d come in for a trim. He had an awesome sense of fashion, too, and since no one else had been in the salon at the time, he’d actually stuck around and had some tea with Hide before leaving. Then a certain purple-haired person had come in, and that had been a revealing visit, if anything…
He heard the bell sounding, letting him know someone was entering the salon behind him. “I’m sorry, I’m closing-“ he started to say as he turned around; he spotted Yoshiki coming in, and his face broke into a grin. “Oh, hey! What are you doing here?”
Yoshiki had finally stopped wearing suits all the time, and looked rather like an average (albeit, very well-dressed) man as he came in with a bouquet of pink carnations. “I just wanted to take you home myself. I don’t approve of the subway system, you know.”
Hide felt a blush just barely dusting his cheeks. “Then what’s with the flowers?”
Yoshiki shrugged, stopping in front of Hide, and holding them out to him. “I just wanted to dote on you.”
Hide smiled and took the flowers, feeling rather like a silly girl. He allowed Yoshiki’s arms to come around his waist as the other man scooped him closer for a kiss. It was a short kiss, though, mainly because Hide broke it to ask a question that had been on his mind for much of the evening. “Are you annoyed with me?”
Yoshiki looked surprised to be asked such a thing. He kept one arm securely around Hide’s waist, but let go with the other so he could brush a strand of pink hair out of his lover’s eyes. “Of course not. Why would you think so?”
Hide shrugged. “Oh, just something Kaoru said about me and you and religion…”
Yoshiki’s ears tinged pink. “Is that so? Well, Kaoru needs to mind his own business and keep other people’s comments to himself.”
Hide looked up at Yoshiki, eyes slightly widened. “You mean, you do think it’s annoying that I read the Bible now!?”
Yoshiki sighed and pulled away from Hide. He ran a hand through his blonde locks, and turned back to look at the other man. “It’s not that I’m constantly irritated with you, it’s just that there are some days… Well, the Hide I always knew wasn’t interested in religion. I mean, he was sort of, but not like this.”
Hide wasn’t sure to say to that. He swallowed and nodded before saying dejectedly, “Then maybe I’m no longer the Hide you always knew.”
A look of great pain crossed over Yoshiki’s visage, and he again took Hide into his arms. “Don’t say that,” he said softly. “You’re everything I want and more, Hide. I wouldn’t change you for anything. The issue of religion is a simple one that I can get around, okay? Please, don’t think that I don’t love you anymore because of some stupid thing Kaoru said.”
Hide smiled and nodded. It was easy to believe Yoshiki when he was pressed so close to his chest like he was-when he could smell the flowers Yoshiki had bought for him…when he could hear Yoshiki’s heart beating for him. He knew they could have stayed like that all night and been the two happiest people in the world, but the bell rang again and he pulled away from Yoshiki with a disgruntled sigh. “I’m sorry, I’m clo-Maya-san?”
That same young man he’d had tea with earlier was standing in front of the door, looking a mixture of embarrassed and forlorn. “I-I’m sorry for walking in on you like that, Hide-san, it’s just…well, I wanted to ask you something.”
Yoshiki raised an eyebrow at the young man before looking inquisitively at Hide. Hide ignored him for the time-being and offered Maya a pleasant smile. “Of course! What is it?”
Maya sighed, looking anywhere but at Hide’s face. “It’s just…my roommate and I had some problems, and he kicked me out of the apartment. I haven’t got a place to stay…all my family’s in Sapporo… I knew I could come to you…somehow, I just believe you can help me…”
Sympathy filled Hide, and he jaunted over to Maya to pat his shoulder. “You can stay with Yoshiki and me!”
* * * * *
I had paced the innards of the apartment forty-eight times before Kyo finally came home. I know because I was counting. I was damn nervous to say what I needed to say to him, but that was part of the problem. I couldn’t let Kyo make me feel nervous or scared or stupid anymore. That part of our relationship was in the past. It was time we reached a higher ground. It was time we learned to have more respect for one another. Hide was also damn right about my title not meaning anything-I was the date doctor, and yet I hadn’t figured this crucial thing out without the help of my ex-guardian angel.
The doorknob turned and I hurriedly dashed over to the couch, flipping on the TV quickly. It was on the weather channel, but I didn’t have time to change it, so I just pretended to be deeply engrossed in it, though I was really paying close attention to Kyo behind me. “Hey,” he said, sounding like he was in a very bad mood.
Just perfect. I was so looking forward to having this conversation with him while he was Mr. Pissy.
“Hey,” I said, making sure my voice carried a certain stiffness.
He turned on a lamp somewhere behind me, and then I heard what I was expecting: “Yo-your hair!”
I finally saw him out of the corner of my right eye, so I turned to look at him, smiling as forcedly as I could. “Yep.”
He came closer, looking at me as though he’d just found a supposedly extinct animal. “You-it-it’s black! You look…you look like a totally different person!”
I shrugged and nodded. I’d had Hide trim off a few inches and re-layer it on top of dying it a rich black. We’d both cheered and giggled like little girls over the remarkable change it seemed to bring to the rest of my features. Then I’d goggled at my reflection in the mirror for about ten minutes after I got home, shocked that a little bit of hair color could make me look so different. I thought I looked more mature and less like a college-aged comic book nerd/rock star wannabe. Somehow it made me feel more confident and mature as well. “I visited Hide at his salon today, and we both decided it was time for something different,” I said nonchalantly, turning my gaze back to the television.
He walked in front of me so he could sit at my other side on the couch. His eyes were still glued to me, and I almost wanted to giggle, but reminded myself that I was trying to be more mature, so I just kept pretending to be interested in the next cold front that was supposed to be coming through in a few days.
Suddenly, though, Kyo grabbed my face and turned it so he could kiss me roughly on the mouth. My every instinct was screaming, “YES! JACKPOT! SEX ON THE COUCH!” But I didn’t even kiss back. He was obviously discouraged, and stopped abruptly, looking at me in confusion. He was cuteness and sex rolled up into one little package with that expression and the fact that he was slightly breathless. I had to look back at the TV to keep from practically attacking him in an attempt to have animalistic sex with his adorable little ass.
“What’s wrong?” He asked sharply, starting to sound distantly pissed off again.
I sighed in an irritated sort of fashion, and picked up the remote so I could turn off the TV. “If you must know… I don’t think you had a right to treat me the way you did this morning.”
He looked very obviously stunned at that, but quickly recovered so that he could snap, “And why not?”
I stood up, suddenly finding it easier to talk about this, since he was adopting that tone. It was the tone he’d been adopting since we’d gotten back together after I cheated on him. I loved the man, but I was feeling more than a little miffed all of a sudden. “Well, mostly because you treated me like shit when I didn’t even do anything wrong! You’re my boyfriend-no, you’re my life partner, in case you forgot about that, and I have every right to scream bloody murder when some other guy kisses you!”
He seemed at a loss for words. He stood up as well and said, “You nearly gave me a heart attack by screaming like that! I was still peacefully sleeping, dreaming of you, by the way, and-“
“No,” I cut him off, my voice booming more than I’d meant for it to. “I’m tired of you trying to pin things on me. I’m tired of you trying to make me feel like everything is my fault. Kirito kissed you, and you didn’t do a damn thing about it, did you? You never snapped at him to stop doing that. You never got after him at all. Is there something I should know about, Kyo? What did you guys do today?”
He looked positively flabbergasted, but that expression changed to downright alarm at my last two questions. For a moment I was sorry for implying what I had, but I had to hold firm, even though my heart was starting to pound very fast. “You think we-“ he stopped himself to gasp. “Are you accusing me of cheating on you with Kirito again?”
“If the boot fits,” I said coldly.
He gasped again. “Kaoru! I thought we trusted each other now! You know that I would never-“
“Frankly, no, I don’t,” I interrupted. “And there you go again, trying to make me feel bad because I’m calling you out on something!”
“I am not!” He countered, though he was looking about as collected as I felt. “I’m just saying-“
“Well, don’t,” I snapped. “I don’t want to hear it, Kyo. If you’ll excuse me, I’d like to check my email.”
I really didn’t want to check my email, but I figured it was a good way to end our conversation in a definitive way. I headed for the bedroom, where he kept his laptop, but he grabbed my arm to stop me. “Wait, we can’t just stop talking about this! We have-“
“Frankly,” I said loudly over his next sentence, “I’d rather not have a conversation where you’re just going to continue demeaning me for no good reason. Until you’re ready to admit that you are the one who actually screwed up, I declare this discussion over.”
WOW, had I taken manly pills without knowing it!?
For a split second I thought he was going to start crying, and I was just about to forgo my harsh manner and take him into my arms, but his countenance changed dramatically. His eyes flashed and he set his jaw firmly. “Fine. But I don’t want to be around you while you’re like this. I’m going to stay the night somewhere else.”
“I don’t care,” I said loftily, even though inside I was screaming at myself to just throw myself at his feet and beg for his forgiveness. “I’m serious, Kyo. I’m tired of you treating me the way you do. Go ahead. Go stay with flippin’ Kirito for all I care.”
I scowled at me. “Fine, that’s who I’ll stay with then!”
“Go ahead!” Okay, now I was pushing it. My tone sounded almost cheerful, which completely belied the feeling that a lead weight had been dropped into my stomach.
He brushed roughly past me to go to the bedroom, and in a few minutes had successfully packed up some clothes and overnight necessities. He slung the backpack over his shoulder before seeing to the cats. He set Aisuru up with his leash, then scooped Itami-chan into his arms. “Bye then,” he said; his tone was casual, but his eyes were pleading with me to say something that would stop him from leaving.
I couldn’t back down now, though. I reclaimed my seat on the couch, turning the TV on again. “I guess I’ll see you when you decide to stop being an arrogant asshole.”
I thought that might make him throw down Itami-chan so he could beat the shit out of me, but instead there was a silence before I heard the front door shut behind him. I felt my eyes automatically fill up with tears, but I hastily shook my head at myself. I turned off the TV and got up to go into the bedroom. “You can’t let him have his way,” I said out loud.
I knew we were both stubborn, but by this point I had to hope that our stubbornness didn’t end up driving us apart. After all, WE’D BEEN DRIVEN APART ENOUGH, DON’T YA THINK!?
Part 6
---
Notes: 1) Hehehe, Aisuru gets some air time. *squishes him*
2) So now Kaoru has hair more like this. I think he's so hot in that picture. *_*
3) I thought about adding at the end: "I glared at the author with complete loathing; why the HELL did she have to keep putting us through all this shit!?" But that would break with the flow Kaoru's narration has always had so I didn't. XD; Anyway, you all (and Kaoru) shouldn't worry, I'm not going to put them through all the angst of the previous stories, but no relationship is perfect, so they still have to deal with their bumps anyway. XP
Author: shuichin or Shuichi
Genre: Romance/Action/Humor/etc
Pairings: Kaoru/Kyo, among others
Rating: NC-17 overall
Warnings: Sexual content (obviously), language, violence, fluff, Gackt, sillyness beyond your wildest dreams
Summary: AU. Crossover. Mishap: an unfortunate and possibly unforeseen accident; see "hitch."
Notes: I hope you're all pleased! This is a longer chapter, and although there's some angst involved, I rather like it. ^^V
Cast of Characters || About The Series || FANATICAL A fansite! || hitch_fans
Part 5: Hair-Brained Schemes
I sat at home until something like four in the afternoon, feeling sorry for myself for what had happened with Kyo. The worst of it was that I had mixed feelings. I was upset at everyone involved-myself, Kyo, Kirito… Mostly Kirito. Only Kirito. By the time I finally decided to get off my ass and do something, I was totally convinced that Kirito was just a slimy git who should be taken out and hanged.
Aisuru was who got me of the couch; he kept yowling at me and scratching at the door. I realized Kyo hadn’t taken him on his daily walk. So I dug his little kitty leash out of the entryway closet, wondering to myself why Kyo liked such a dog-like cat.
Finally, I was all bundled up, and Aisuru’s collar was fastened to the leash. We said good-bye to Itami-chan (who didn’t even crack an eye open to look at us), and then left the apartment. He bounded down the apartment steps and to the sidewalk, and I allowed him to lead as we went on our merry way. The sun was shining, but it was still very cold. Before long I realized Aisuru was taking us in a very specific direction, though he was sometimes distracted by dogs or small children. I just let him go where he pleased until he stopped in front of a beauty salon called Rocket Dive Salon. He stopped in front of the door, looked over his shoulder at me with wide blue eyes, and announced, “NYA!”
I raised an eyebrow at the salon, and was about to start us back on our merry way again, but then I caught a glimpse of a pink-haired man inside… I gasped and looked down at Aisuru. “No way! How did you do that!?”
“NYA!” He said before heading toward the main door.
Still feeling completely awed and mildly disturbed, I walked up to the door as well, and flung it open. “Hide!” I burst.
He was just finishing up with a customer, but he looked over at me with wide eyes and a sudden grin. “Kaoru! Hi! What’re you doing here?”
I nodded down to the kitten at my feet. Or rather, the kitten prancing all over, trying to get free of the leash so he could explore the salon. “Aisuru brought me here. Since when have you been able to communicate with cats?”
Hide chuckled, and resumed blow-drying his customer’s hair. When he was finished, and had helped the young woman out of her chair, he turned back to me and said, “I don’t talk to them. But we have an innate connection because of…” He paused and looked at the lady, then grinned at me again as he said in a hushed tone: “You know.”
I shook my head, and took a seat in the waiting area, tying the end of Aisuru’s leash to the handle on the chair. He didn’t seem very happy about being restrained, but he soon busied himself by poking around in the magazine bin next to us. I watched as the woman paid Hide, and he thanked her exuberantly before she left. He took off his apron and plopped down in the chair next to me. “It’s been a busy day!” He informed, though he didn’t look too worn out. In fact, he more or less looked pleased that he’d been kept on his toes all day.
I offered him a smile. “I’m glad the salon is doing well.”
A grin lit up his face again, and he turned his head to look at me. “It is! God’s blessing it, isn’t he?”
My smile faltered, and my expression turned to bewilderment. “Hide…well, are you going to be really…religious now? Because it’s a little…weird. And, you know, it might cause problems for you and Yoshiki.”
He frowned at me. “What do you mean: weird? And anyway, I’m not being religious, I just know the true way things are now. Is that so hard to deal with?”
I shook my head. “Well, no, but a lot of people don’t believe in God-especially in Japan. It might be-“
“Oh, that’s rubbish!” He burst, sitting up, and turning his entire body to face me. “Everyone believes in God, whether they realize it or not! Every soul on this earth is searching for something to fill the emptiness in their lives, and even the ones who are atheists are searching for an unknown, God-like entity to fill that space. They just don’t want to call it God.”
I scratched my head, feeling a little awkward. “Er, right, I mean-“
“And-and how do you think it will cause problems between Yoshiki and I?” He gasped, looking alarmed all of a sudden.
I sighed, cursing myself for opening my big, fat mouth. “I don’t know! I just, I mean…well, he’s a little irritated, that’s all. It’s probably nothing.”
But Hide didn’t look like it was nothing. On the contrary, his eyes widened even more and he looked positively mortified. “Are you-are you serious? And you’re sure it has to do with the fact that I believe in God now and read my Bible?”
I wanted to start laughing and joke around about him owning a Bible, but realized this was Hide, not Hideto, and I couldn’t make jokes like that. Especially not while he was so worried about his relationship with Yoshiki because I had to be a complete dumbass and give him reason to. I moved my chair closer to him so I could grab his hand in both of mine. “Hide, you have nothing to worry about. Yoshiki loves you, so any little obstacles you guys face won’t be a hindrance in the end. Love conquers all, right?”
Hide still looked blatantly traumatized, though, and exclaimed, “But religion’s a whole other playing field! What if-“
“BZZZT!” I burst, successfully shutting him up. “Don’t get started with the ‘what if’s’ because they only lead to trouble. I’m the date doctor, and I’m telling you-“
He snorted, and pulled his hand away from both of mine. “No offense, Kaoru, but a title doesn’t mean anything to me.”
My jaw dropped. “What? But what about the countless couples who could tell you I’m the only reason they lived happily ever after?”
He shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t think you should expect people to feel at ease about their relationships just because you can tell them smoothly why there shouldn’t be any problems, and in doing so tack your title to the end of your statement so that they’ll believe you. You’ve been wrong before, after all, and it isn’t fair of you to try to give me false hope when you blatantly told me to be careful of flaunting my religion around Yoshiki for fear of our relationship.”
I stared at him in muted surprise. I hadn’t expected him to go off on me like that, and I was already frustrated enough that when I realized he’d told me off, I snapped harshly, “Well, excuse me for trying to be helpful!” I stood up, getting thoroughly infuriated with Aisuru’s leash as I tried to untie it. “I guess I can’t do any damn thing right, and I’m sick and tired of people getting angry with me when I haven’t even done anything meriting it! First Kyo, now you-“
“NYA!” Aisuru protested when I finally got the leash untangled and started in the direction of the door.
“Oh, you want to pick a fight with me, too!?” I glowered at the kitten. “Fine then, when we get home, you’re GROUNDED.”
“Kaoru,” Hide interjected, stepping close enough to me to grab my arm.
“What!?” I almost roared, feeling dangerously unbalanced.
He glared at me, but quickly wiped the look off of his face so he could replace it with a more sympathetic one. “Well, first of all…you just grounded a cat.”
I blinked several times before coming up with a suitable response: “So?”
He shook his head. “Secondly, I’m sorry if I made you feel like you can’t do anything right. I know that isn’t true.” He offered me his cute smile, and I couldn’t stay mad.
That asshole.
I shrugged, feeling some of my anger leak out. “Well…thanks. I didn’t mean to shout, I’m just having a bad day.”
He nodded. “Which leads me to my third point… What happened with Kyo?”
Well, he didn’t need to ask me twice. We were sitting down again, and Aisuru had finally run out of energy as he slept in Hide’s lap before I finished going over the whole story. This was mostly because I had to shriek and make emphatic hand motions and whine about how life isn’t fair. Because, really, it’s not that long of a story to tell.
Anyway, I was expecting Hide to get after me again, only this time for being a terrible boyfriend. Instead he looked at me thoughtfully and said bluntly, “You take way too much shit from him.”
At first I didn’t know what he meant, but then the answer dawned on me, and I sighed, slumping in defeat. “You’re right. But that’s because I know he could kick my ass. He’s done it before, you know! You were there even! Still, maybe I can take it to my lawyer and we can get a restraining order-“
“What are you talking about?” Hide asked, looking puzzled.
I blinked. “Er, Kirito, duh. Isn’t that who you were talking about?”
He shook his head. “No, I was actually talking about Kyo.”
My mouth fell open in surprise. “You think I take too much shit from Kyo!? I certainly do not! I know when enough is enough and I-“
But Hide was shaking his head before I’d finished the word “certainly.” He sighed and pulled his feet up onto the chair, wrapping his arms around his knees and carefully situating the kitten beside him. “Kaoru, I was a firsthand witness to your relationship, remember? I could write up a long list for you of all the times you let him beat you verbally without so much as standing up for yourself. This morning is no exception to that. Kirito kissed him, and he flipped out at you for no good reason. You’re the only person involved not at fault, as far as I’m concerned.”
I stared. When he put it that way… “Well, I know that,” I defended. “I mean, obviously I’m the one not at fault bec-“
“Then why did you let Kyo make you believe you were?”
I opened and closed my mouth a few times, but no response would come out. That was a very good question! I leaned back in my chair, rubbing my chin uncertainly. It seemed that Kyo had some annoying power over me to make me feel like I was at fault when I wasn’t. Why was it that I always let him have his way? Why was it that I always took his shit-not only that, but I let myself believe he was an innocent angel in the grand scheme of things. “I don’t know,” I said at last.
Hide shook his head, looking almost piteously at me. “I’ll bet it stems from way back when you cheated on him. I’m sorry to bring that up, but I’m sure that’s what started it. You were living in guilt, and he really was the innocent party. Things have changed a lot, though, and you can’t keep letting yourself believe you’re always the guilty one and he’s always the innocent one. I mean, you’re not always innocent either, nor is he always guilty, but that’s my point. It’s neither extreme. I hope I’m making sense…”
Whether he was actually making sense or not didn’t matter. Suddenly a light had turned on in my brain. He was absolutely right. Somehow I had made myself believe that if I didn’t always let Kyo have his way and if I didn’t always bow to his every whim, he would leave me. I needed to stand up for myself more. I needed to have some control over our relationship as much as he did.
I practically jumped up from my chair, and scooped Aisuru up. He yawned and stretched, accidentally clawing my chest, but I didn’t care much at the moment. I all-but slung him over my shoulder and announced to Hide, “Well, Kyo will be back home soon, and I’m going to be waiting for him. You’re damn right, and things are going to change around our apartment!”
Hide jumped up, too. “WAIT! Before you go, can I take care of your split ends? Pretty please?”
I had every intention of saying no and just leaving, but I had to make the mistake of looking over at him. Hide has the best puppy dog eyes you’ve ever seen. I sighed and set Aisuru back down on the chair, tying the end of his leash to the armrest in case he should wake up and decide to go snooping around. “All right, all right…”
“We should do something about your hair color, too,” he said thoughtfully, eyes roving over my head.
I felt oddly self-conscious as I sat down in one of the special chairs, and allowed him to cover my clothes up. “Erm…no, I think just a trim-“
“But Kaoru, your roots are showing!” He said sharply, as though that sort of thing were a crime against humanity. “You look ridiculous! It would be awful of me to leave your hair the way it is! And you know, that color makes you look sort of silly. I doubt Kyo will be able to take you seriously if you’re running around like something that escaped from the circus!”
I gasped at his words. “You know, that’s really high of you to say, Mr. Pink Hair!”
But then he glared at me in the mirror, and I realized that I could take him seriously with pink hair. Meanwhile, I looked like a big, goofy dork sitting there in front of him. He was right, too: my roots were showing, and they made it all worse. All in all, I had a sort of frumpy look about me, and that was completely unattractive. All of a sudden I found myself retching at the sight of myself. “You’re right! I’M UGLY!” I wailed.
He petted my hair and said soothingly, “No, but you would look much better with a natural hair color…”
* * * * *
The salon was least busy in the evening, so Hide didn’t have many more visitors. By seven he was closing up shop, pondering the day’s events to himself. First there had been that impossibly adorable young man who’d come in for a trim. He had an awesome sense of fashion, too, and since no one else had been in the salon at the time, he’d actually stuck around and had some tea with Hide before leaving. Then a certain purple-haired person had come in, and that had been a revealing visit, if anything…
He heard the bell sounding, letting him know someone was entering the salon behind him. “I’m sorry, I’m closing-“ he started to say as he turned around; he spotted Yoshiki coming in, and his face broke into a grin. “Oh, hey! What are you doing here?”
Yoshiki had finally stopped wearing suits all the time, and looked rather like an average (albeit, very well-dressed) man as he came in with a bouquet of pink carnations. “I just wanted to take you home myself. I don’t approve of the subway system, you know.”
Hide felt a blush just barely dusting his cheeks. “Then what’s with the flowers?”
Yoshiki shrugged, stopping in front of Hide, and holding them out to him. “I just wanted to dote on you.”
Hide smiled and took the flowers, feeling rather like a silly girl. He allowed Yoshiki’s arms to come around his waist as the other man scooped him closer for a kiss. It was a short kiss, though, mainly because Hide broke it to ask a question that had been on his mind for much of the evening. “Are you annoyed with me?”
Yoshiki looked surprised to be asked such a thing. He kept one arm securely around Hide’s waist, but let go with the other so he could brush a strand of pink hair out of his lover’s eyes. “Of course not. Why would you think so?”
Hide shrugged. “Oh, just something Kaoru said about me and you and religion…”
Yoshiki’s ears tinged pink. “Is that so? Well, Kaoru needs to mind his own business and keep other people’s comments to himself.”
Hide looked up at Yoshiki, eyes slightly widened. “You mean, you do think it’s annoying that I read the Bible now!?”
Yoshiki sighed and pulled away from Hide. He ran a hand through his blonde locks, and turned back to look at the other man. “It’s not that I’m constantly irritated with you, it’s just that there are some days… Well, the Hide I always knew wasn’t interested in religion. I mean, he was sort of, but not like this.”
Hide wasn’t sure to say to that. He swallowed and nodded before saying dejectedly, “Then maybe I’m no longer the Hide you always knew.”
A look of great pain crossed over Yoshiki’s visage, and he again took Hide into his arms. “Don’t say that,” he said softly. “You’re everything I want and more, Hide. I wouldn’t change you for anything. The issue of religion is a simple one that I can get around, okay? Please, don’t think that I don’t love you anymore because of some stupid thing Kaoru said.”
Hide smiled and nodded. It was easy to believe Yoshiki when he was pressed so close to his chest like he was-when he could smell the flowers Yoshiki had bought for him…when he could hear Yoshiki’s heart beating for him. He knew they could have stayed like that all night and been the two happiest people in the world, but the bell rang again and he pulled away from Yoshiki with a disgruntled sigh. “I’m sorry, I’m clo-Maya-san?”
That same young man he’d had tea with earlier was standing in front of the door, looking a mixture of embarrassed and forlorn. “I-I’m sorry for walking in on you like that, Hide-san, it’s just…well, I wanted to ask you something.”
Yoshiki raised an eyebrow at the young man before looking inquisitively at Hide. Hide ignored him for the time-being and offered Maya a pleasant smile. “Of course! What is it?”
Maya sighed, looking anywhere but at Hide’s face. “It’s just…my roommate and I had some problems, and he kicked me out of the apartment. I haven’t got a place to stay…all my family’s in Sapporo… I knew I could come to you…somehow, I just believe you can help me…”
Sympathy filled Hide, and he jaunted over to Maya to pat his shoulder. “You can stay with Yoshiki and me!”
* * * * *
I had paced the innards of the apartment forty-eight times before Kyo finally came home. I know because I was counting. I was damn nervous to say what I needed to say to him, but that was part of the problem. I couldn’t let Kyo make me feel nervous or scared or stupid anymore. That part of our relationship was in the past. It was time we reached a higher ground. It was time we learned to have more respect for one another. Hide was also damn right about my title not meaning anything-I was the date doctor, and yet I hadn’t figured this crucial thing out without the help of my ex-guardian angel.
The doorknob turned and I hurriedly dashed over to the couch, flipping on the TV quickly. It was on the weather channel, but I didn’t have time to change it, so I just pretended to be deeply engrossed in it, though I was really paying close attention to Kyo behind me. “Hey,” he said, sounding like he was in a very bad mood.
Just perfect. I was so looking forward to having this conversation with him while he was Mr. Pissy.
“Hey,” I said, making sure my voice carried a certain stiffness.
He turned on a lamp somewhere behind me, and then I heard what I was expecting: “Yo-your hair!”
I finally saw him out of the corner of my right eye, so I turned to look at him, smiling as forcedly as I could. “Yep.”
He came closer, looking at me as though he’d just found a supposedly extinct animal. “You-it-it’s black! You look…you look like a totally different person!”
I shrugged and nodded. I’d had Hide trim off a few inches and re-layer it on top of dying it a rich black. We’d both cheered and giggled like little girls over the remarkable change it seemed to bring to the rest of my features. Then I’d goggled at my reflection in the mirror for about ten minutes after I got home, shocked that a little bit of hair color could make me look so different. I thought I looked more mature and less like a college-aged comic book nerd/rock star wannabe. Somehow it made me feel more confident and mature as well. “I visited Hide at his salon today, and we both decided it was time for something different,” I said nonchalantly, turning my gaze back to the television.
He walked in front of me so he could sit at my other side on the couch. His eyes were still glued to me, and I almost wanted to giggle, but reminded myself that I was trying to be more mature, so I just kept pretending to be interested in the next cold front that was supposed to be coming through in a few days.
Suddenly, though, Kyo grabbed my face and turned it so he could kiss me roughly on the mouth. My every instinct was screaming, “YES! JACKPOT! SEX ON THE COUCH!” But I didn’t even kiss back. He was obviously discouraged, and stopped abruptly, looking at me in confusion. He was cuteness and sex rolled up into one little package with that expression and the fact that he was slightly breathless. I had to look back at the TV to keep from practically attacking him in an attempt to have animalistic sex with his adorable little ass.
“What’s wrong?” He asked sharply, starting to sound distantly pissed off again.
I sighed in an irritated sort of fashion, and picked up the remote so I could turn off the TV. “If you must know… I don’t think you had a right to treat me the way you did this morning.”
He looked very obviously stunned at that, but quickly recovered so that he could snap, “And why not?”
I stood up, suddenly finding it easier to talk about this, since he was adopting that tone. It was the tone he’d been adopting since we’d gotten back together after I cheated on him. I loved the man, but I was feeling more than a little miffed all of a sudden. “Well, mostly because you treated me like shit when I didn’t even do anything wrong! You’re my boyfriend-no, you’re my life partner, in case you forgot about that, and I have every right to scream bloody murder when some other guy kisses you!”
He seemed at a loss for words. He stood up as well and said, “You nearly gave me a heart attack by screaming like that! I was still peacefully sleeping, dreaming of you, by the way, and-“
“No,” I cut him off, my voice booming more than I’d meant for it to. “I’m tired of you trying to pin things on me. I’m tired of you trying to make me feel like everything is my fault. Kirito kissed you, and you didn’t do a damn thing about it, did you? You never snapped at him to stop doing that. You never got after him at all. Is there something I should know about, Kyo? What did you guys do today?”
He looked positively flabbergasted, but that expression changed to downright alarm at my last two questions. For a moment I was sorry for implying what I had, but I had to hold firm, even though my heart was starting to pound very fast. “You think we-“ he stopped himself to gasp. “Are you accusing me of cheating on you with Kirito again?”
“If the boot fits,” I said coldly.
He gasped again. “Kaoru! I thought we trusted each other now! You know that I would never-“
“Frankly, no, I don’t,” I interrupted. “And there you go again, trying to make me feel bad because I’m calling you out on something!”
“I am not!” He countered, though he was looking about as collected as I felt. “I’m just saying-“
“Well, don’t,” I snapped. “I don’t want to hear it, Kyo. If you’ll excuse me, I’d like to check my email.”
I really didn’t want to check my email, but I figured it was a good way to end our conversation in a definitive way. I headed for the bedroom, where he kept his laptop, but he grabbed my arm to stop me. “Wait, we can’t just stop talking about this! We have-“
“Frankly,” I said loudly over his next sentence, “I’d rather not have a conversation where you’re just going to continue demeaning me for no good reason. Until you’re ready to admit that you are the one who actually screwed up, I declare this discussion over.”
WOW, had I taken manly pills without knowing it!?
For a split second I thought he was going to start crying, and I was just about to forgo my harsh manner and take him into my arms, but his countenance changed dramatically. His eyes flashed and he set his jaw firmly. “Fine. But I don’t want to be around you while you’re like this. I’m going to stay the night somewhere else.”
“I don’t care,” I said loftily, even though inside I was screaming at myself to just throw myself at his feet and beg for his forgiveness. “I’m serious, Kyo. I’m tired of you treating me the way you do. Go ahead. Go stay with flippin’ Kirito for all I care.”
I scowled at me. “Fine, that’s who I’ll stay with then!”
“Go ahead!” Okay, now I was pushing it. My tone sounded almost cheerful, which completely belied the feeling that a lead weight had been dropped into my stomach.
He brushed roughly past me to go to the bedroom, and in a few minutes had successfully packed up some clothes and overnight necessities. He slung the backpack over his shoulder before seeing to the cats. He set Aisuru up with his leash, then scooped Itami-chan into his arms. “Bye then,” he said; his tone was casual, but his eyes were pleading with me to say something that would stop him from leaving.
I couldn’t back down now, though. I reclaimed my seat on the couch, turning the TV on again. “I guess I’ll see you when you decide to stop being an arrogant asshole.”
I thought that might make him throw down Itami-chan so he could beat the shit out of me, but instead there was a silence before I heard the front door shut behind him. I felt my eyes automatically fill up with tears, but I hastily shook my head at myself. I turned off the TV and got up to go into the bedroom. “You can’t let him have his way,” I said out loud.
I knew we were both stubborn, but by this point I had to hope that our stubbornness didn’t end up driving us apart. After all, WE’D BEEN DRIVEN APART ENOUGH, DON’T YA THINK!?
Part 6
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Notes: 1) Hehehe, Aisuru gets some air time. *squishes him*
2) So now Kaoru has hair more like this. I think he's so hot in that picture. *_*
3) I thought about adding at the end: "I glared at the author with complete loathing; why the HELL did she have to keep putting us through all this shit!?" But that would break with the flow Kaoru's narration has always had so I didn't. XD; Anyway, you all (and Kaoru) shouldn't worry, I'm not going to put them through all the angst of the previous stories, but no relationship is perfect, so they still have to deal with their bumps anyway. XP