My Family
I'm not going to lie; I love my family. I love my parents, I love my siblings. I would never change families.
Sometimes, though...
I dunno. Sometimes it really bugs me that my mom obviously loves my brother more than me. Maybe because his personality is closer to hers? I don't know...for whatever reason, he's her favorite. She told him he was baritone. She told me I was playing clarinet; I didn't have a choice. Now, she acts as if my instrument is crap and the Low Brass is like the most awesome section in the world. It's like...if you had wanted me to play low brass, why did you tell me to play clarinet? If you thought clarinets sucked, why did you tell me to play it? And the worst part is, she played clarinet! She should appreciate it...but she doesn't, because Joe is in the low brass. I seriously doubt that if he played something else that she would be as enthused about them as she is since he's in the section. Which I suppose is understandable...but then that would mean that she should like the clarinets, too. Which she obviously doesn't.
And then after school and after our after school activities she never seems to care how my day went. Maybe it's because my brother is totally dependent; he can't really take care of himself. He needs my mom to hold his hand and make sure he does his homework and doesn't fail all his classes and blah blah blah. But still...that doesn't mean she can't take an interest in how my day went. And she makes it seem like she does, or at least tries to; sometimes she'll ask or I'll start talking about it and she'll listen and stuff, but then if my brother says something she'll immediately pretend I hadn't been talking. Sometimes she even interupts me to ask Joe something.
But today...today takes the cake.
I went to Argonne today for a Women In Science thing as a field trip (it was only 6 of us from the whole school, and it went until like 5). It was totally awesome!! Like, majorly utterly completely and totally uberly awesome! I got to tour the particle accelerator and talk to a physicist and a bunch of awesome stuff! And on the way home I told my mom about it and stuff, and she seemed interested and I was really happy; her attention was totally on me. I know that sounds totally conceited, but it was a really nice feeling. And so we get home and start dinner and I'm feeling good because my day has been great.
And eventually my dad asks me, "So what exactly did you do today at your physics thing?"
And I start explaining excitedly what I did. Then, not even a minute since I began talking, Joe gets up and goes to his backpack, and returns with a piece of paper. And my mom interupts me. "Oh, this is hilarious, show it to Dad." And so Joe gives it to my dad, who totally forgets that I was talking in order to read the paper Joe gave him.
That really hurt. I mean...I guess I can understand if my mom doesn't think my daily life is terribly important. I guess I can even sort of accept that she likes Joe better because he's more like her. But...well, I thought my dad was impartial.
It really hurts that he just blew me off like that.
And then the worst part is, after that he never even asked me to finish what I was saying. Like... I'm writing this an hour later, and he's never asked me what I did at Argonne, even though I had only gotten as far as saying what we did about ten minutes into the day.
It really hurts to know that your own parents could care that little.
Sometimes, though...
I dunno. Sometimes it really bugs me that my mom obviously loves my brother more than me. Maybe because his personality is closer to hers? I don't know...for whatever reason, he's her favorite. She told him he was baritone. She told me I was playing clarinet; I didn't have a choice. Now, she acts as if my instrument is crap and the Low Brass is like the most awesome section in the world. It's like...if you had wanted me to play low brass, why did you tell me to play clarinet? If you thought clarinets sucked, why did you tell me to play it? And the worst part is, she played clarinet! She should appreciate it...but she doesn't, because Joe is in the low brass. I seriously doubt that if he played something else that she would be as enthused about them as she is since he's in the section. Which I suppose is understandable...but then that would mean that she should like the clarinets, too. Which she obviously doesn't.
And then after school and after our after school activities she never seems to care how my day went. Maybe it's because my brother is totally dependent; he can't really take care of himself. He needs my mom to hold his hand and make sure he does his homework and doesn't fail all his classes and blah blah blah. But still...that doesn't mean she can't take an interest in how my day went. And she makes it seem like she does, or at least tries to; sometimes she'll ask or I'll start talking about it and she'll listen and stuff, but then if my brother says something she'll immediately pretend I hadn't been talking. Sometimes she even interupts me to ask Joe something.
But today...today takes the cake.
I went to Argonne today for a Women In Science thing as a field trip (it was only 6 of us from the whole school, and it went until like 5). It was totally awesome!! Like, majorly utterly completely and totally uberly awesome! I got to tour the particle accelerator and talk to a physicist and a bunch of awesome stuff! And on the way home I told my mom about it and stuff, and she seemed interested and I was really happy; her attention was totally on me. I know that sounds totally conceited, but it was a really nice feeling. And so we get home and start dinner and I'm feeling good because my day has been great.
And eventually my dad asks me, "So what exactly did you do today at your physics thing?"
And I start explaining excitedly what I did. Then, not even a minute since I began talking, Joe gets up and goes to his backpack, and returns with a piece of paper. And my mom interupts me. "Oh, this is hilarious, show it to Dad." And so Joe gives it to my dad, who totally forgets that I was talking in order to read the paper Joe gave him.
That really hurt. I mean...I guess I can understand if my mom doesn't think my daily life is terribly important. I guess I can even sort of accept that she likes Joe better because he's more like her. But...well, I thought my dad was impartial.
It really hurts that he just blew me off like that.
And then the worst part is, after that he never even asked me to finish what I was saying. Like... I'm writing this an hour later, and he's never asked me what I did at Argonne, even though I had only gotten as far as saying what we did about ten minutes into the day.
It really hurts to know that your own parents could care that little.