Pick-A-Porn 1: Twin Peaks - Castle
Foralethialia who wanted Castle: Ryan/Esposito
Twin Peaks
“No way. Uh-uh.”
“You are such a pussy.” Ryan flops down on the red couch, settling his beer mid-way up his chest. “Are we playing Madden or what?”
“I’ve seen way too many things in dumpsters to go anywhere near that couch.”
“Okay, first of all, you love this couch. Your ass has been on this couch twice a week for two years playing the X-box. Secondly, you’ve slept on this couch before…”
“And there aren’t enough showers in the world.”
“And third,” Ryan glares at him. “I didn’t get it out of a god-damned dumpster.”
“Right. Right.” Esposito takes a long pull from his beer. “You got it off a street corner after all the homeless, junkies and whores sat on it.”
“You don’t think people sit on the couches you buy at Sears, you heathen?” Ryan sets his beer on the coffee table and gives Esposito a look. “What makes you so sure your couch is clean?”
“I don’t have a couch. That’s why I’ve been courting bed bugs and every other scary ass disease New York has on yours.”
“Jesus.” Ryan rolls his eyes and grabs Esposito’s wrist, jerking him forward. Esposito stumbles, sprawling half on the couch and half on Ryan’s lap. Beer splatters over the red fabric as well as the two of them.
“What the hell!” Esposito tries to get to his feet, struggling to get away from both Ryan and the couch, but one of Ryan’s hands is wrapped tightly around his wrist and the other is settled firmly in the small of Esposito’s back.
“The couch won’t hurt you, Javier. The couch is your friend.”
“If you don’t let me up, man, I’m going to eviscerate you. And as a cop, I know all the tricks to get away with it, so even Beckett and Castle can’t solve the crime.”
Ryan laughs and tugs Esposito’s hand forward so that he can rub it against the couch. “Touch it. It won’t bite.”
“You don’t know that.” Esposito finally cracks a smile. “Okay. Okay. We’ll play Madden, but I want a garbage bag to wear.”
“I’m not into that kinky shit, dude.” Ryan shoves Esposito to the floor and stands up, tugging his beer-stained shirt over his head and heading toward his bedroom. “How many times do I have to tell you that.”
Esposito stares after him for a minute then gets to his feet and follows him. “Just tell me you got your mattresses from the store. Wrapped in plastic. Untouched by human hands.”
“Oh yeah, man. Absolutely.” Ryan undoes his belt and fly as he turns around and backs into the bedroom, smiling at Esposito all the while. “I’ll tell you whatever you need to hear.”
Twin Peaks
“No way. Uh-uh.”
“You are such a pussy.” Ryan flops down on the red couch, settling his beer mid-way up his chest. “Are we playing Madden or what?”
“I’ve seen way too many things in dumpsters to go anywhere near that couch.”
“Okay, first of all, you love this couch. Your ass has been on this couch twice a week for two years playing the X-box. Secondly, you’ve slept on this couch before…”
“And there aren’t enough showers in the world.”
“And third,” Ryan glares at him. “I didn’t get it out of a god-damned dumpster.”
“Right. Right.” Esposito takes a long pull from his beer. “You got it off a street corner after all the homeless, junkies and whores sat on it.”
“You don’t think people sit on the couches you buy at Sears, you heathen?” Ryan sets his beer on the coffee table and gives Esposito a look. “What makes you so sure your couch is clean?”
“I don’t have a couch. That’s why I’ve been courting bed bugs and every other scary ass disease New York has on yours.”
“Jesus.” Ryan rolls his eyes and grabs Esposito’s wrist, jerking him forward. Esposito stumbles, sprawling half on the couch and half on Ryan’s lap. Beer splatters over the red fabric as well as the two of them.
“What the hell!” Esposito tries to get to his feet, struggling to get away from both Ryan and the couch, but one of Ryan’s hands is wrapped tightly around his wrist and the other is settled firmly in the small of Esposito’s back.
“The couch won’t hurt you, Javier. The couch is your friend.”
“If you don’t let me up, man, I’m going to eviscerate you. And as a cop, I know all the tricks to get away with it, so even Beckett and Castle can’t solve the crime.”
Ryan laughs and tugs Esposito’s hand forward so that he can rub it against the couch. “Touch it. It won’t bite.”
“You don’t know that.” Esposito finally cracks a smile. “Okay. Okay. We’ll play Madden, but I want a garbage bag to wear.”
“I’m not into that kinky shit, dude.” Ryan shoves Esposito to the floor and stands up, tugging his beer-stained shirt over his head and heading toward his bedroom. “How many times do I have to tell you that.”
Esposito stares after him for a minute then gets to his feet and follows him. “Just tell me you got your mattresses from the store. Wrapped in plastic. Untouched by human hands.”
“Oh yeah, man. Absolutely.” Ryan undoes his belt and fly as he turns around and backs into the bedroom, smiling at Esposito all the while. “I’ll tell you whatever you need to hear.”