Superman blew me up. Think it was with those cheap eye-laser things he got. Hey, if ya gotta go out, I guess gettin' atomized is one of the less painful ways of goin' about it
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I didn't tell you guys? Oh... Right... Guess I fergot t'mention that. Didn't seem all that important at the time.
And it ain't so much "died" as much as "am dead." Like, current state-of-affairs kinda thing. I'd been in Metropolis a while with Ivy, y'know? We were havin' a pretty good time out there, actually. I had a sweet cover job at the Daily Planet doin' this love advice shtick, and Ivy had her garden, and we'd rob the city blind and nobody even noticed. But then that Thorn gal comes into it, and Bizarro was there, too, they don't really matter. We stole a jetpack, 'cuz... Well, why not? Flyin's great by the way. I can see why the super-dweebs love it so much. But anyway, I was gonna "kill" that Jimmy Olsen kid, right? Lookin' back on it, I don't think I really wanted to kill the sap, just mess with 'im, y'know? He was such a little self-proclaimed playboy, it got t'me how he just went around telling every girl he met he loved her. Who wouldn't be annoyed, right?
Anyway, Big S probably thought I was SERIOUS about it all, comes and does his intimidation routine on me, oh, and there was a Bizarro-making machine in there, too. Not mine, just... there for some reason, I don't remember. By the way, Bizarro-Harley? Nowhere near as cute as the original. Anyway, once Bizarro and my distasteful doppleganger are gone- and Big S is standing right next to me this whole time, y'know, it's not like I don't KNOW it- I kick Jimmy outta the hole Biz made on his way out, y'know, buy myself some time to fly away?
The creep zaps me like it's nothin'! No super-speed chasing after me and catching me, and I KNOW he coulda, too! It wasn't like I was goin' light speed, for pete's sake!
So, if Hell gave out postcards, I woulda already given you guys some.
And that freak calls himself a hero! He probably convinced himself that killing you was righteous! Heroes and their moral superiority--it's fine for them brutalize us or murder us for petty crimes, but we so much as sneeze at any of their precious little friends or walk past a bank and we're evil!
Ahem.
That wasn't very sporting of him. Obviously, no one told him that shooting lasers of your eyes is cheating.
Are you kiddin'? I'm a psychologist and I don't know what the heck's the matter with me. But then again, that's probably just denial talking. Either way, it ain't something I wanna think about.
Aw, c'mon, Eddie, even I'm tough enough to go toe-to-toe with the Bat for a while. I mean, not long, obviously, but hey, for the record, you and Jonny need to work out more. 'specially if I could beat the snot out of you two.
My strengths are purely cerebral; I have minions for the Bat to play with. Not here, obviously...
If you beat the snot out of me, I won't invite you over for dinner. I was thinking broiled lobster with crab stuffing... possibly with a mango sauce. Do you like red wines? I thought it might go nicely.
And it ain't so much "died" as much as "am dead." Like, current state-of-affairs kinda thing. I'd been in Metropolis a while with Ivy, y'know? We were havin' a pretty good time out there, actually. I had a sweet cover job at the Daily Planet doin' this love advice shtick, and Ivy had her garden, and we'd rob the city blind and nobody even noticed. But then that Thorn gal comes into it, and Bizarro was there, too, they don't really matter. We stole a jetpack, 'cuz... Well, why not? Flyin's great by the way. I can see why the super-dweebs love it so much. But anyway, I was gonna "kill" that Jimmy Olsen kid, right? Lookin' back on it, I don't think I really wanted to kill the sap, just mess with 'im, y'know? He was such a little self-proclaimed playboy, it got t'me how he just went around telling every girl he met he loved her. Who wouldn't be annoyed, right?
Anyway, Big S probably thought I was SERIOUS about it all, comes and does his intimidation routine on me, oh, and there was a Bizarro-making machine in there, too. Not mine, just... there for some reason, I don't remember. By the way, Bizarro-Harley? Nowhere near as cute as the original. Anyway, once Bizarro and my distasteful doppleganger are gone- and Big S is standing right next to me this whole time, y'know, it's not like I don't KNOW it- I kick Jimmy outta the hole Biz made on his way out, y'know, buy myself some time to fly away?
The creep zaps me like it's nothin'! No super-speed chasing after me and catching me, and I KNOW he coulda, too! It wasn't like I was goin' light speed, for pete's sake!
So, if Hell gave out postcards, I woulda already given you guys some.
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And that freak calls himself a hero! He probably convinced himself that killing you was righteous! Heroes and their moral superiority--it's fine for them brutalize us or murder us for petty crimes, but we so much as sneeze at any of their precious little friends or walk past a bank and we're evil!
Ahem.
That wasn't very sporting of him. Obviously, no one told him that shooting lasers of your eyes is cheating.
Reply
Well, anyway, at least now I know why I hate Metropolis. Much as I hate Batsy, at least you stand a chance against him sometimes, right?
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Ah ha. Ha. I'm more than a match for him intellectually, but if it comes to fisticuffs--
Well! Suffice it to say, I'd be highly disappointed if I went out any other way.
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Aw, c'mon, Eddie, even I'm tough enough to go toe-to-toe with the Bat for a while. I mean, not long, obviously, but hey, for the record, you and Jonny need to work out more. 'specially if I could beat the snot out of you two.
Reply
My strengths are purely cerebral; I have minions for the Bat to play with. Not here, obviously...
If you beat the snot out of me, I won't invite you over for dinner. I was thinking broiled lobster with crab stuffing... possibly with a mango sauce. Do you like red wines? I thought it might go nicely.
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Reply
If, however, you're angling for a date... ♥
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