Dramarama
Yeah. So my second post is gonna explain how the one place that became the hub of my life since high school has undergone a long, tapering decline.
The ballroom dance studio.
The original owners of the studio were a married couple named John and Julie. They were my teachers for many years, until I started taking lessons from another teacher named Tom (who happens to be a gamer like me) and his girlfriend/dance partner, Molly. Tom and I hang out a lot to play miniatures wargaming, Counter-strike, Warcraft 3, or even D&D occasionally. Tom's an awesome guy--laid-back, and very nice if occasionally slightly flaky.
Another friend is Gary. Gary and I started dancing on the same day when we showed up for the youth class at the studio. He very quickly became a natural (which isn't to say he didn't work his ass off--he definitely did), and I never quite got up to the level of dancing he attained. I'd known him for several years prior--he'd been in a homeschooling program with my younger sister. Gary and his partner Angela took lessons from John & Julie. Gary and I also DJed the Friday night dance parties at the studio for a long time. I've got many fond memories of those days.
About three years ago there was a messy incident wherein Gary got in an argument with John & Julie. Gary felt he was reaching a level where he'd like to learn more flashy choreography. John took offense, things were said on both sides, and apparently Angela sided with John. The upshot is that Gary wound up being banned from the studio by John. The friend I'd spent countless hours working and playing with was no longer allowed at the studio where I spent all my time. It was the beginning of the end. Everyone loved Gary, and many days I wish I'd just followed him.
Not long afterwards, John and Julie split up in a very messy divorce. John kept the studio and Julie more or less disappeared from the radar. John became withdrawn and depressed for a time, but then he seemed to get happier. Shortly afterward, studio patrons and other youth dancers began asking me whether John and Angela were dating. Still a relatively naive guy, I told them "no way!" I couldn't believe that John, a 35-year old man whom I knew as a father figure, would pursue one of his students, a 17-year-old girl. This was a girl who'd started dancing only weeks after Gary and I, and I saw no evidence of a relationship.
But I had my head in the clouds, and John and Angela were being relatively discreet. At first. The truth came out not much later, but Angela was now eighteen. As disturbing as that concept was, I tried to put it out of my head. It wasn't any of my business. If it was legal and it made them happy, who was I to say what was right or wrong, no matter how creepy I found it? John had always been a father figure to me, while Angela felt somewhat like a sister.
John went through emotional ups and downs as he and Julie fought to deal with the details of the divorce and changing the studio from being jointly-owned into just being in John's name. Studio business declined sharply with the economic downturn after 9-11-2001, and as regulars who learned about John and Angela left, disgusted.
I put it out of my mind and continued to DJ, although to steadily smaller crowds.
But John and Angela's relationship didn't fizzle, as everyone figured it would (everyone besides me, who made no such predictions). The studio began to recover slightly, as new customers who weren't aware of the story arrived and began to build a new community. The process was arduous but things looked promising.
In the last few months I'd allowed myself to get hopeful. John remodeled and repainted the studio, raising the ceiling, installing an awesome lighting system, and knocking out a wall to make things more open. We'd had a couple of parties that were almost as good as the ones back in the old days.
Well, we had a couple of really busy nights that were almost as good as the slow nights from back then.
Several weeks ago, there was a messy incident. Tom got his schedule wrong and missed an appointment with a student. She happened to be young and attractive, and instead of John doing what he normally did (calling Tom), he schmoozed his way on over, offered her a free lesson, and apparently put the moves on her something fierce.
Now, several months prior, John had laid down the rules about 'stealing students.' One teacher had moved in on another teacher's students, and John made it clear that it wasn't professional, and he didn't want it happening at his studio.
So Tom finds out later that John has taken his student, but even then he's not really pissed (I told you he was laid back). He accepted John's explanation of the situation, which was that he was just trying to help out the student.
Another teacher later explained to Tom how it really went down, and that's when ever-mellow Tom...finally got pissed. Things were said, and the upshot is that Tom left the studio, and John banned him.
I'd always asked myself what it'd take for me to finally leave the studio. I usually told myself, "if Tom and Molly ever leave, I'm absolutely gone. Even though Molly's still teaching some lessons at the studio (in this economy, you take work where you can get it), I'm about ready to get gone. I enjoy DJing the dance parties, I love the sound system, and I like having access to hundreds of CDs...
...But if I could quietly burn a shitload of music and burn a copy of the software for the music-playing program, I'd be out in a second. So I'm still around for now, until I can start working on that.
I used to want John's respect when I was a kid. Now I'm an adult, and I've grown to learn that he doesn't deserve it at all.
The ballroom dance studio.
The original owners of the studio were a married couple named John and Julie. They were my teachers for many years, until I started taking lessons from another teacher named Tom (who happens to be a gamer like me) and his girlfriend/dance partner, Molly. Tom and I hang out a lot to play miniatures wargaming, Counter-strike, Warcraft 3, or even D&D occasionally. Tom's an awesome guy--laid-back, and very nice if occasionally slightly flaky.
Another friend is Gary. Gary and I started dancing on the same day when we showed up for the youth class at the studio. He very quickly became a natural (which isn't to say he didn't work his ass off--he definitely did), and I never quite got up to the level of dancing he attained. I'd known him for several years prior--he'd been in a homeschooling program with my younger sister. Gary and his partner Angela took lessons from John & Julie. Gary and I also DJed the Friday night dance parties at the studio for a long time. I've got many fond memories of those days.
About three years ago there was a messy incident wherein Gary got in an argument with John & Julie. Gary felt he was reaching a level where he'd like to learn more flashy choreography. John took offense, things were said on both sides, and apparently Angela sided with John. The upshot is that Gary wound up being banned from the studio by John. The friend I'd spent countless hours working and playing with was no longer allowed at the studio where I spent all my time. It was the beginning of the end. Everyone loved Gary, and many days I wish I'd just followed him.
Not long afterwards, John and Julie split up in a very messy divorce. John kept the studio and Julie more or less disappeared from the radar. John became withdrawn and depressed for a time, but then he seemed to get happier. Shortly afterward, studio patrons and other youth dancers began asking me whether John and Angela were dating. Still a relatively naive guy, I told them "no way!" I couldn't believe that John, a 35-year old man whom I knew as a father figure, would pursue one of his students, a 17-year-old girl. This was a girl who'd started dancing only weeks after Gary and I, and I saw no evidence of a relationship.
But I had my head in the clouds, and John and Angela were being relatively discreet. At first. The truth came out not much later, but Angela was now eighteen. As disturbing as that concept was, I tried to put it out of my head. It wasn't any of my business. If it was legal and it made them happy, who was I to say what was right or wrong, no matter how creepy I found it? John had always been a father figure to me, while Angela felt somewhat like a sister.
John went through emotional ups and downs as he and Julie fought to deal with the details of the divorce and changing the studio from being jointly-owned into just being in John's name. Studio business declined sharply with the economic downturn after 9-11-2001, and as regulars who learned about John and Angela left, disgusted.
I put it out of my mind and continued to DJ, although to steadily smaller crowds.
But John and Angela's relationship didn't fizzle, as everyone figured it would (everyone besides me, who made no such predictions). The studio began to recover slightly, as new customers who weren't aware of the story arrived and began to build a new community. The process was arduous but things looked promising.
In the last few months I'd allowed myself to get hopeful. John remodeled and repainted the studio, raising the ceiling, installing an awesome lighting system, and knocking out a wall to make things more open. We'd had a couple of parties that were almost as good as the ones back in the old days.
Well, we had a couple of really busy nights that were almost as good as the slow nights from back then.
Several weeks ago, there was a messy incident. Tom got his schedule wrong and missed an appointment with a student. She happened to be young and attractive, and instead of John doing what he normally did (calling Tom), he schmoozed his way on over, offered her a free lesson, and apparently put the moves on her something fierce.
Now, several months prior, John had laid down the rules about 'stealing students.' One teacher had moved in on another teacher's students, and John made it clear that it wasn't professional, and he didn't want it happening at his studio.
So Tom finds out later that John has taken his student, but even then he's not really pissed (I told you he was laid back). He accepted John's explanation of the situation, which was that he was just trying to help out the student.
Another teacher later explained to Tom how it really went down, and that's when ever-mellow Tom...finally got pissed. Things were said, and the upshot is that Tom left the studio, and John banned him.
I'd always asked myself what it'd take for me to finally leave the studio. I usually told myself, "if Tom and Molly ever leave, I'm absolutely gone. Even though Molly's still teaching some lessons at the studio (in this economy, you take work where you can get it), I'm about ready to get gone. I enjoy DJing the dance parties, I love the sound system, and I like having access to hundreds of CDs...
...But if I could quietly burn a shitload of music and burn a copy of the software for the music-playing program, I'd be out in a second. So I'm still around for now, until I can start working on that.
I used to want John's respect when I was a kid. Now I'm an adult, and I've grown to learn that he doesn't deserve it at all.