(no subject)
Jake: I’m going to remember your behavior from tonight.
Sophie: I’m going to remember your behavior.
Jake: I’m clean. I did nothing wrong. Essentially, I’m an angel in this affair.
Sophie: I needed your help and you just stood there watching NASCAR or something.
Jake: Cheap shot. It was a replay of a crash-big difference. Saying I was watching NASCAR is slander.
Sophie: You are from the South.
Jake: My parents relocated to Atlanta from Chicago. I was forged in the North. Plus, Atlanta is the city too busy to hate.
Sophie: But not too busy to watch cars go in a circle.
Jake: That’s true.
Sophie: I wouldn’t have left the apartment unless I found my hair rubber band. I can’t go to a play with my hair down, so you should have looked more than you did.
Jake: I looked! I looked in the bed. I pulled apart the sheets and the seat cushions on the couch. That’s due diligence.
Sophie: But you didn’t look as hard as you would have if you lost something.
Jake: No, of course not.
Sophie: Why!
Jake: Well, it’s your responsibility, ultimately. I guess that’s the difference between me losing something and you losing something: the loser looks harder. That’s natural law.
Sophie: Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. You are selfish-that’s why this isn’t going to work out between us. You never sacrifice, you don’t struggle for me. I would have done the same for you as for me. I would have looked as if it was OUR lost belonging-that is my struggle for you.
Jake: Can we drop the civil rights movement language? That’s first. Second, this is a really stupid argument. You lost a scunci, a mother-fucking scunci. I thought that if you found it, great, if not, no big, Move on. Make do.
Sophie: I wouldn’t have gone unless I found it. That must be what you wanted.
Jake: This is a joke? You wouldn’t have gone? Do you know how much these tickets cost? This is why you are a crazy person. In addition, every time you act this way you set feminism back 10 years-in one move you wipe out all the gains myself and others have worked for.
Sophie: You are not a feminist-you’re Italian.
Jake: Racist.
Sophie: Wife-beater.
Jake: Wife-beater?
Sophie: Oily, Italian wife-beater-not a feminist.
Jake: I am for equal rights. Not this “to each according to his ability crap.” So if in a given situation a man warrants a slap, if said by a woman, then she too deserves the slap. No special treatment. Equal rights. That’s hardly wife-beating. Unlike you, I am open-minded enough to realize that the F.M. advances because more women are struck-under the proper conditions-and not DESPITE of it.
Sophie: F.M.?
Jake: Feminist movement.
Sophie: Instead of watching NASCAR, instead of justifying domestic violence..
Jake: …domestic equality…
Sophie: …you could have been helping me find my hair band.
Jake: What the fuck is in your hair now?
Sophie: Oh shit. Yeah, that’s it. I guess it was stuck in my hair.
Jake: See, this is a time when hitting you would be wrong, even if it would make me feel better.
Sophie: I’m going to remember your behavior.
Jake: I’m clean. I did nothing wrong. Essentially, I’m an angel in this affair.
Sophie: I needed your help and you just stood there watching NASCAR or something.
Jake: Cheap shot. It was a replay of a crash-big difference. Saying I was watching NASCAR is slander.
Sophie: You are from the South.
Jake: My parents relocated to Atlanta from Chicago. I was forged in the North. Plus, Atlanta is the city too busy to hate.
Sophie: But not too busy to watch cars go in a circle.
Jake: That’s true.
Sophie: I wouldn’t have left the apartment unless I found my hair rubber band. I can’t go to a play with my hair down, so you should have looked more than you did.
Jake: I looked! I looked in the bed. I pulled apart the sheets and the seat cushions on the couch. That’s due diligence.
Sophie: But you didn’t look as hard as you would have if you lost something.
Jake: No, of course not.
Sophie: Why!
Jake: Well, it’s your responsibility, ultimately. I guess that’s the difference between me losing something and you losing something: the loser looks harder. That’s natural law.
Sophie: Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. You are selfish-that’s why this isn’t going to work out between us. You never sacrifice, you don’t struggle for me. I would have done the same for you as for me. I would have looked as if it was OUR lost belonging-that is my struggle for you.
Jake: Can we drop the civil rights movement language? That’s first. Second, this is a really stupid argument. You lost a scunci, a mother-fucking scunci. I thought that if you found it, great, if not, no big, Move on. Make do.
Sophie: I wouldn’t have gone unless I found it. That must be what you wanted.
Jake: This is a joke? You wouldn’t have gone? Do you know how much these tickets cost? This is why you are a crazy person. In addition, every time you act this way you set feminism back 10 years-in one move you wipe out all the gains myself and others have worked for.
Sophie: You are not a feminist-you’re Italian.
Jake: Racist.
Sophie: Wife-beater.
Jake: Wife-beater?
Sophie: Oily, Italian wife-beater-not a feminist.
Jake: I am for equal rights. Not this “to each according to his ability crap.” So if in a given situation a man warrants a slap, if said by a woman, then she too deserves the slap. No special treatment. Equal rights. That’s hardly wife-beating. Unlike you, I am open-minded enough to realize that the F.M. advances because more women are struck-under the proper conditions-and not DESPITE of it.
Sophie: F.M.?
Jake: Feminist movement.
Sophie: Instead of watching NASCAR, instead of justifying domestic violence..
Jake: …domestic equality…
Sophie: …you could have been helping me find my hair band.
Jake: What the fuck is in your hair now?
Sophie: Oh shit. Yeah, that’s it. I guess it was stuck in my hair.
Jake: See, this is a time when hitting you would be wrong, even if it would make me feel better.