I hate death
So I don't know if anyone reads this anymore. I wouldn't blame you all, seeing as how I never write in here anymore.
I just wanted to mention that my friend Jennifer White died this past Thursday night.
She was only 20.
They're not really sure what happened. They're calling it a "heart attack." She might have had a heart condition she never knew about. Who knows.
I don't really know what to say about it. It's been really rough. I keep switching back and forth from feeling a lot of feeling to feeling nothing at all.
Words can't even begin to describe the amazing person she was. Ask anyone and they'll tell you the same. I always loved how she always went out of her way to make me feel included. Always always always. And that's a pretty huge deal considering how awkward and shy I am. For real, I can't even explain how strong and beautiful and loving she was. This whole paragraph seems like such a lame attempt.
Somehow I'm not at all comforted when people say, "It's ok; she's in a better place." Granted, if there's a heaven, Jennifer White is definitely there. Trust me. I just wish she was here to explain to me how she was so sure.
I found out on Friday in the middle of class. It was such a shock. I still don't believe it, and I've already been to the visitation. I've seen for myself that it's true.
Tomorrow morning is the funeral. Camerata is singing. Singing in funerals in one of those things that I hate doing, yet if I didn't do it I would never forgive myself.
Well...I guess that's all I can say about it. R.I.P. Jennifer. You will be dearly missed. I will never, ever, ever, ever forget you.
I just wanted to mention that my friend Jennifer White died this past Thursday night.
She was only 20.
They're not really sure what happened. They're calling it a "heart attack." She might have had a heart condition she never knew about. Who knows.
I don't really know what to say about it. It's been really rough. I keep switching back and forth from feeling a lot of feeling to feeling nothing at all.
Words can't even begin to describe the amazing person she was. Ask anyone and they'll tell you the same. I always loved how she always went out of her way to make me feel included. Always always always. And that's a pretty huge deal considering how awkward and shy I am. For real, I can't even explain how strong and beautiful and loving she was. This whole paragraph seems like such a lame attempt.
Somehow I'm not at all comforted when people say, "It's ok; she's in a better place." Granted, if there's a heaven, Jennifer White is definitely there. Trust me. I just wish she was here to explain to me how she was so sure.
I found out on Friday in the middle of class. It was such a shock. I still don't believe it, and I've already been to the visitation. I've seen for myself that it's true.
Tomorrow morning is the funeral. Camerata is singing. Singing in funerals in one of those things that I hate doing, yet if I didn't do it I would never forgive myself.
Well...I guess that's all I can say about it. R.I.P. Jennifer. You will be dearly missed. I will never, ever, ever, ever forget you.