Life: A Text Message Adventure!
Once upon a time, time didn't exist. Life was dull and rather grey-colored and occasionally read books on accounting. One morning (though morning also didn't exist), Life was reading an extremely boring passage about the number five and its uses in making people very upset, when he had an idea. This was an unexpected thing. Manifestations of ideas rarely had ideas of their own. They generally went about their own business and sometimes enjoyed a sandwich. But not today (if today had actually existed). Today (or whatever) Life was going to do something with his... self. He closed his book and stepped away from his kitchen table (which held a particularly unappetizing pickle and motor oil sandwich). "I'm going to ride a bike," he said. "I'm going to ride a bike over rocks and possibly down hills. And then I'm going to tie a piece of stretchy rubber to my stomach and jump off of a cliff. Then I'm going to get in a boat and row down choppy waters."
So Life set out on his adventure. He had a blast. After he finished with his previously stated goals, he found many ways to keep himself entertained and living himself to the fullest. He jumped out of flying devices with pieces of fabric to slow his descent. He wrestled with a grizzly bear. He climbed a tree. He climbed a mountain. He climbed a tree on a mountain. And with no time to stop him, he just kept going. Years and years (if they had existed) went by with no signs of stopping. Some other ideas were getting a little nervous about this. Fun, in particular, was very upset. Life and Fun had been married for no amount of time (for it still doesn't exist yet). Things had been going rather routinely until Life began dragging her out to do all these insane activities of his. She skipped on a few, claiming things like that her sister Depression was in town and they were going to get a drink. So he'd go on his adventures alone, but living just wasn't the same without her.
Eventually, Fun stopped going with him at all. Life didn't know what to do with himself. Without even knowing what had happened, he found himself in the arms of Depression. Depression would be there for him, when Fun would not. Though it never felt the same as it did with Fun, he couldn't stop himself from doing things with her sister. They listened to music by The Cure in her basement. They laid in bed staring at the walls. They failed to answer the telephone or doorbell. Depression became pregnany with Life's child. They tried to keep it a secret from Fun... But one non-day, Life asked his wife if they could have a party for Depression's new child (whose father they claimed was Forgetfulness). Fun agreed, as she was beginning to miss doing things with Life. They invited all of their friends to the party. Truth showed up late. He walked up to Depression and they began to chat and drink. Depression was unaware she was drinking spiked punch.
The punch ran out, so Life went to buy some more. Truth had now gotten Depression thoroughly wasted. She felt a strong urge to come clean to her sister. She ran to Fun as Truth laughed in the corner. It was while running that Depression's water broke. Everyone rushed to her side as she began to give birth. She could not keep the truth from her sister as much as she couldn't keep the child within her for much longer without bursting. Through a mask of tears, Depression told the whole story to Fun. Every Idea and Emotion in the room was shocked. Life returned with the punch. Fun looked at him with hate in her eyes. She picked up a knife that was used to cut the cake and charged. Fun let out a yell as she killed her husband. At the exact same moment, Depression screamed while giving one last push birthing her child, Time. So it was on that day that both Time and Death were brought into the world.
So Life set out on his adventure. He had a blast. After he finished with his previously stated goals, he found many ways to keep himself entertained and living himself to the fullest. He jumped out of flying devices with pieces of fabric to slow his descent. He wrestled with a grizzly bear. He climbed a tree. He climbed a mountain. He climbed a tree on a mountain. And with no time to stop him, he just kept going. Years and years (if they had existed) went by with no signs of stopping. Some other ideas were getting a little nervous about this. Fun, in particular, was very upset. Life and Fun had been married for no amount of time (for it still doesn't exist yet). Things had been going rather routinely until Life began dragging her out to do all these insane activities of his. She skipped on a few, claiming things like that her sister Depression was in town and they were going to get a drink. So he'd go on his adventures alone, but living just wasn't the same without her.
Eventually, Fun stopped going with him at all. Life didn't know what to do with himself. Without even knowing what had happened, he found himself in the arms of Depression. Depression would be there for him, when Fun would not. Though it never felt the same as it did with Fun, he couldn't stop himself from doing things with her sister. They listened to music by The Cure in her basement. They laid in bed staring at the walls. They failed to answer the telephone or doorbell. Depression became pregnany with Life's child. They tried to keep it a secret from Fun... But one non-day, Life asked his wife if they could have a party for Depression's new child (whose father they claimed was Forgetfulness). Fun agreed, as she was beginning to miss doing things with Life. They invited all of their friends to the party. Truth showed up late. He walked up to Depression and they began to chat and drink. Depression was unaware she was drinking spiked punch.
The punch ran out, so Life went to buy some more. Truth had now gotten Depression thoroughly wasted. She felt a strong urge to come clean to her sister. She ran to Fun as Truth laughed in the corner. It was while running that Depression's water broke. Everyone rushed to her side as she began to give birth. She could not keep the truth from her sister as much as she couldn't keep the child within her for much longer without bursting. Through a mask of tears, Depression told the whole story to Fun. Every Idea and Emotion in the room was shocked. Life returned with the punch. Fun looked at him with hate in her eyes. She picked up a knife that was used to cut the cake and charged. Fun let out a yell as she killed her husband. At the exact same moment, Depression screamed while giving one last push birthing her child, Time. So it was on that day that both Time and Death were brought into the world.