well then.
So I've lasted this long, but this place is really just starting to eat at me, from the inside out. I hate this place. I wish I didn't, but I do. I miss Phil a lot. Today is 4 months for us. I hope I get to talk to him tonight. I mean, after all, he's the one who got me into the 'anniversary' thing so he should at least call me back. That'd be nice. If he doesn't, oh well ... just another disappointment to tack on to this vacation. I hate being home, I hate being in this house, I hate Nebraska ... and this place is making me hate myself. Again. Perfect ... the thing that I've tried SO hard to do is to learn to love myself and now being here has thrown me back a few notches. Okay, so a lot of notches. Whatever. I hope everyone else is having a better vacation than me.