Charlie's doom: Prologue
Ville blinked back tears, his heart dropping all the way to his stomach, at the stone face his pro-skater gave him. Usually Ville was the reserved, stronger male out of the two, but at the moment he wanted to drop to the floor and beg Bam for forgiveness, or at least to speak to him.
His stomach was in knots, as he stood outside the airport, that Dunn dropped him off at. They were early for his flight, three days early. The one that he could find last minute, he was fifteen minutes away from having to deal with the cramped security line, and all the other bullshit that goes along with it. Ville needed to leave, he couldn't stay at Bam's house, and receive the cold shoulder. Not after what had happened.
The Fin took a drag from his fagstick, his fingers trembled with the emotions that scrambled around inside of his head. His emerald stare flicking over to Bam. He was leaned up against his hummer, a cigarette hung loosely from his lips. His usual boyish smirk wasn't on his lips, and his eyes weren't the lively shade of sapphire he knew. He watched Bam, his eyes followed a couple that were holding hands, smiles were pasted on their faces, and they were pressed up flush against each others sides. They looked in love, hopelessly in love.
Ville watched them also, Dunn stood besides him in his own world, while the two males observed the gay couple. Ville snuck a look at Bam, his face had fallen, his lips turned down into a deep frown that Ville wanted to kiss away. He wanted to take his skater into his arms and hug him, but that wasn't ever going to happen again. A spark of hope flared inside of him, his eyes brightening. He turned his stare to Bam, and let his eyes rest on him, taking in the longing stare that watched the two boys with envy.
Ville took a drag, letting the smoke fill his lungs, and build up his confidence. He exhaled, his voice thick with the drag that guided off of his tongue. "Bammie." He cooed lowly, his stare turning on the male. "Can we talk?" He asked causing Dunn's head to snap to him, his eyes wide with anxiety. He knew Bam when he was mad, but like Ryan. Ville did too. He was taking a chance.
The Finnish singer took a step closer , and dropped his cigarette, his body moving slowly. Bam turned his gaze to him, his stare having no mercy on Ville, he glared holes through the Fin. Ville shrivelled back at the stare, his heart was wrenched out of his chest, and the thrashing hadn't even started yet. "No, what we did was a fucking mistake, stop being stupid and realize, what we did the other night was nothing. I'm not a faggot. Got it? Not. A. Faggot." He spoke in a harsh hiss of words, his hands clenching at his side, like he was going to punch him. He had to take a moment to breath, his shoulder falling when he could control himself. "We're bro's alright, now go home, and call me when you get back, kay?" he asked, Ville couldn't answer, tears springing to his eyes but going unshead. He nodded, because that was the only thing he could do.
Ville looked at him with his hurt hues, and it was Bam's turn to flinch away. "No." He said finding his voice. It came out because of love, and because the beauty of the memory couldn't be cherished as a mistake. "Your not a faggot, but you were mine, maybe for only a few minutes, but its enough." He said his anger rising at the words that fell from his mouth quickly, bringing out his strong accent. He turned his body letting his back face Bam, while he leaned down to grab his bag. "Your gay, get the fuck over it Bam." With that said, there was nothing else to speak about.Ville had never sworn directly at Bam, but things had changed. He was shattered, and vulnerable,it felt like with one blow of the wind he would be taken away. "Bye Dunn." Ville said with a small smile directed at the male that watched them. He had a frown pasted on his grizzly bear mug.
The Fin turned his back, and with what ever courage he had, he walked away. He couldn't look back though, if he did, his strength would permanently sink away leaving him a heap of hurt. He hurried off to the doors of the air port. "Ville!" Dunn's voice cut him out of his inner war, his head turning to watch the blond chase after him. He didn't give Ville a moment to speak, but instead threw himself at him enveloping the two in a hug. Ville hugged him back, his strength wavering, as he let himself be squeezed in an embrace, a few stray tears left his eyes. He couldn't fall apart now, not in front of any one. When he was alone he knew it would hit, and all the self hatred would bring him down to his knees, as he sobbed. But right now he was withdrawing into a place that was numb, a part in his head
where no one could get to him.
Ville felt Dunn slip something into his pocket, his lips whispering into his ear. "I'll see you soon." He promised Ville before patting him on the shoulder and walking off.
Ville touched the envelope that was in his pocket, his forefinger stroking the paper. He didn't ask or look back, but instead smiled at Dunn and walked away. Ryan was a good friend to Bam, but he didn't know if he supported Bam and Ville as one, but he couldn't read what was in his pocket just yet, just in case it was something that would cut deeper.
Going through the airport was slow, and Ville moved like a zombie, his clumsy limbs moving forward when he had to, and slumping when he got the chance. He ignored most people, his emerald stare focusing on the steps of going home. He was growing cold, and agitated. A woman bumped into on his way onto the plane and he pegged her with a nasty stare. Any other day he would of smiled and muttered a "sorry Darling", but his mind couldn't waste time on petty small talk.
He felt broken, and weak, each step was forced and painful. When he slid down into his seat, he let his body collapse into itself, a small whimper leaving his parted lips. He tried not to let any one hear, but he couldn't hold off the pain. It surrounded him like a tidal wave crashing down. His hands shook, as tears fell down his translucent skin. His usual porcelain cheeks were red and swelled by salty tears. His eyeliner ran down his face in streaks of black.
He reached for the note, as the flight attendant spoke up. She anounced overly happy that they would be taking off in ten minutes. Ville didn't take his time with opening the note, his fingers quick and impatient. Once he got it open he smiled, and read the careless scribbles written on the paper:
Aye Willa Walo!
It's Ryan, you probably know that because I most likely handed it to you and your reading it now. Or now, or ya right now!
Sorry for walking in on the two of you, ya know...... doing it and shit. I just wanted my CD, Bammy boy takes it all the time. Alright, i need to get to the point. The whole reason for this is, i want to tell you, even though Bam doesn't know it. He loves you. Loves you more then the world, its seriously hasn't been one day that he hasn't said your name. I'm about to punch the dick for not noticing it. He is probably whining about how he isn't a "faggot" But thats just how he deals with shit. He will come to his senses. I hate being all sentimental because it makes me feel like a huge ass moron, but i approve. I am on your team, the sooner you two idiots make up and come to the realization your perfect for each other, the sooner i can throw a party. Your family Ville. Oh yeah, and i don't know how to say this so, ill just come out and tell you. Don't tell them im telling you because ill probably be rejected from sex for a month! He wants to wait for a good time, but i want this shit out in the open. I'm in love with Linde, ya im fucking gay too. Alright. love you man.
Ryan Dunn.
Ville blinked back a few tears, his breath coming out in a raspy chuckle, as he clutched the paper to his heart, his head fell back. Dunn would forever be his favorite. With that he fell into the memory of what happened. Bam's drunken self entering his room while Ville was on the bed. It had been tense the whole weak he was there, since the both missed each other equally. Bam threw himself onto Ville. He still remembered the sweet taste of Bam, as his tongue invaded him. His Bammie let out purrs, small little cat like moans that made Ville lose all self control. He was so beautiful in his arms, so obedient and loving. The only thing that he didn't understand in the memory was. How was Ville the man in this? The question helped mend the pain, and silence his sobs, turning his wicked lips into a handsome smile.