WHAT IS THE REASON
I dont know what to fucking do. I am at the BIGGEST crossroads of my life right now.
I like being here because I have security here. I have a job. I know I can pay my rent. I know the streets.
here are all the options I can see.
1. Stay- But why? other than the fact that all my other options are worse
2. Live with parents- I cant even begin to say how much i DONT want to go nack to living with my parents
3. Live with sister- I know nothing about clearwater and living with my sister in little mexico with a crying baby and a growing family is not how i want to spend my youth God damnit. I want to go DO SHIT. I want to be HAPPY. fuck
4. Live in Sarasota- The atmosphere of sarasota is equally unappealing as my parents. plu si feel like i would get tired of noelle kinda fast. and I woudl just be stuck there in a town I hate everything about. PLus that shit is expensive
5. fucking..............just go to Japan. SOme how..find a way to get the fuck up ...and leave this entire worthless country
I would choose #5 without any hesitation whatsoever if the means were available to me.
The most logical choice woudl be my sister.
But
i
dont
want
that.
As of august I am a free agent. I in theory can do anything i want.
What do I want.
we al lknow what I want, and I cant have that. So what am i prepared to do about it
My god this is hard. Can I just quit. Quit life right now. Just be like..ok I'm done. Next please.
Ive seen all there is to see here. Moooooving on.
I want to have my own shit. My own life, with the shit I love.
UHgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg but i cant.
Im going to cry. My god damn brain is so tired of going over eveything over and over. Why can't he just say yes.
I like being here because I have security here. I have a job. I know I can pay my rent. I know the streets.
here are all the options I can see.
1. Stay- But why? other than the fact that all my other options are worse
2. Live with parents- I cant even begin to say how much i DONT want to go nack to living with my parents
3. Live with sister- I know nothing about clearwater and living with my sister in little mexico with a crying baby and a growing family is not how i want to spend my youth God damnit. I want to go DO SHIT. I want to be HAPPY. fuck
4. Live in Sarasota- The atmosphere of sarasota is equally unappealing as my parents. plu si feel like i would get tired of noelle kinda fast. and I woudl just be stuck there in a town I hate everything about. PLus that shit is expensive
5. fucking..............just go to Japan. SOme how..find a way to get the fuck up ...and leave this entire worthless country
I would choose #5 without any hesitation whatsoever if the means were available to me.
The most logical choice woudl be my sister.
But
i
dont
want
that.
As of august I am a free agent. I in theory can do anything i want.
What do I want.
we al lknow what I want, and I cant have that. So what am i prepared to do about it
My god this is hard. Can I just quit. Quit life right now. Just be like..ok I'm done. Next please.
Ive seen all there is to see here. Moooooving on.
I want to have my own shit. My own life, with the shit I love.
UHgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg but i cant.
Im going to cry. My god damn brain is so tired of going over eveything over and over. Why can't he just say yes.