Humbug Hermit
It's getting closer to Christmas & I'm slowly becoming more & more of a hermit each week. I wasn't as bothered about being alone for Christmas last year as I am this year but it's kinda getting under my skin this time around. But I can't blame anyone but myself, I choose to be alone. My mom offered to go up to Boston for Christmas(my uncle lives there) but I don't want to be stuck babysitting on my 21st. As far as friends go, I've lost contact with everyone so I got no one to hang out with either. So my Christmas will definitely be me drinking alone lol.
I need to get out more but I'm either too tired or too down in the dumps to get motivated to go out. I can't remember the last time I felt so down about myself really. It's just lately I'm the target of everyone's jokes & with everything they joke about I lose a little bit more confidence & hate myself just a little bit more. I hear everything from fat jokes to short jokes to bald jokes to "you've never had a girlfriend" jokes. All that plus the only friends I hang out with are Jon & Ryan who I'm just a sidekick that gets picked on constantly. I just feel so small & insignificant....
I need to get out more but I'm either too tired or too down in the dumps to get motivated to go out. I can't remember the last time I felt so down about myself really. It's just lately I'm the target of everyone's jokes & with everything they joke about I lose a little bit more confidence & hate myself just a little bit more. I hear everything from fat jokes to short jokes to bald jokes to "you've never had a girlfriend" jokes. All that plus the only friends I hang out with are Jon & Ryan who I'm just a sidekick that gets picked on constantly. I just feel so small & insignificant....