~Missing Him ------{----@
well jordan has been gone a week now...
for the first few days it was ok cause it hadnt settled in yet that he wasnt going to come back for a week or so.
by the 3rd day i started missing him so much i couldnt wait for him to come back home to me.
now its even worse i was able to talk with him a little bit today but he was at the Grand Canyon so he had no signal.
Hes suppose to come home tomorrow night...late at night...so i wont see him until the next morning if he comes over then.
its not cool im not thinking like i normally do...my mind is racing with a thousand questions all of which i know the answers to but still the denial that my answers are wrong lay in the back of my head.
and no its not a question of trust. i never question my trust of him, i trust him, i love him and i dont think anything different of that.
my questions are what is he going to be like when he comes back...im sure hell be fine...but what if hes not what if this trip changed his way of thinking...probably not...but its still back in my head. in my heart i feel everything is going to be fine if not better. my head says something is going to be different. i hate this it almost feels like i have a split personality...i know i dont...but thats just what it feels like...i have to tell myself to believe my heart, and not the "what if" factor.
apparently were not getting anything from hurricane Charley he shifted to the east and missed us completly. the weather said we were suppose to get heavy storms and such but where i live in lecanto we had a little rain around 5-6pm thats about it.
but i feel bad for the ppl in Port Charlotte that got hit directly by it. and a lot of them were not even remotly prepared.
i think i may go visit the school soon. visit some of my old teachers. maybe. i kinda miss going to school. i think its mainly if i dont work in the morning i miss having something productive to do in the morning. im going to start college in jan. and i decided to get degrees in 3 different courses...well thats my plan right now. wether or not its going to work/go through is a different story.
i wanted to take Business Management, Computer Engineering, and Business Admin. Career Ladder from AS to BS
each course will probably cost 5-6,000 but it may be very benificial to take the 3 like that or maybe after i finish one if it is possible maybe continue at an university for a higher degree. like i said im not sure yet.
*kiss* ----{---@ *hug*
for the first few days it was ok cause it hadnt settled in yet that he wasnt going to come back for a week or so.
by the 3rd day i started missing him so much i couldnt wait for him to come back home to me.
now its even worse i was able to talk with him a little bit today but he was at the Grand Canyon so he had no signal.
Hes suppose to come home tomorrow night...late at night...so i wont see him until the next morning if he comes over then.
its not cool im not thinking like i normally do...my mind is racing with a thousand questions all of which i know the answers to but still the denial that my answers are wrong lay in the back of my head.
and no its not a question of trust. i never question my trust of him, i trust him, i love him and i dont think anything different of that.
my questions are what is he going to be like when he comes back...im sure hell be fine...but what if hes not what if this trip changed his way of thinking...probably not...but its still back in my head. in my heart i feel everything is going to be fine if not better. my head says something is going to be different. i hate this it almost feels like i have a split personality...i know i dont...but thats just what it feels like...i have to tell myself to believe my heart, and not the "what if" factor.
apparently were not getting anything from hurricane Charley he shifted to the east and missed us completly. the weather said we were suppose to get heavy storms and such but where i live in lecanto we had a little rain around 5-6pm thats about it.
but i feel bad for the ppl in Port Charlotte that got hit directly by it. and a lot of them were not even remotly prepared.
i think i may go visit the school soon. visit some of my old teachers. maybe. i kinda miss going to school. i think its mainly if i dont work in the morning i miss having something productive to do in the morning. im going to start college in jan. and i decided to get degrees in 3 different courses...well thats my plan right now. wether or not its going to work/go through is a different story.
i wanted to take Business Management, Computer Engineering, and Business Admin. Career Ladder from AS to BS
each course will probably cost 5-6,000 but it may be very benificial to take the 3 like that or maybe after i finish one if it is possible maybe continue at an university for a higher degree. like i said im not sure yet.
*kiss* ----{---@ *hug*