(no subject)
How do I stop caring about what others are thinking about me? HOW!! I don't know why I struggle with this! It has scared me into a shell of my former self and I'm desperately seeking me. I feel exhausted all the time... I'm struggling to find balance still.. I work with joey and he learns new things every day, we don't live in a total vacuum. Joey watched too much TV at one point, but now he will go days without watching television. I'm so glad! And he is starting to try new foods. :) All that worry... all in my head! Joey is so amazing.. he learns everything so quickly; I have to encourage him in so many ways! I hope a lot for our son, I hope a lot for our family. I feel so ready for any "depresion" that hits if things get worse, We are at least stable right now. I'm so hopeful for small business! I really believe that "small time" things are going to start making major impacts in the history of us... Do I believe we have found an answer yet? I really can't say; God is revealing it all in his time... I have only... just been avoiding it! God works in strange ways, but how often did I choose not to listen? I cant say enough that I feel revived; I kissed my inner emo kid good bye and I went through a drastic change; but not so drastic, just attempting to improve and embelish the base that I've forged. I am snowballing into something.. I FEEL SO CLOSE TO EPIFANY I CAN TASTE IT......... To sound a little absurd.. I really feel so good about everything that is happening; I have no worries and that is a God thing! I am really thinking of dropping my makeup class.. though it would be more logical to drop my theater history 2 class... Why have you shifted me towards debbie God??????????????? Do you have intentions or is it all just coincidence? I really hope I haven't made a fool of myself all this time.. I look back at some of the thigns i've said in public.. I'm really horrible at sounding smart and end up making an arse of myself half the time. I simply keep to myself.... more recently I've put on a smile; I feel good about that.