(no subject)
Maddy wore me out today and yesterday. I was getting scared about my heart and lungs cause I was getting out of breath so easily. It's rather normal, but it's been happening more often and lasts longer. I could feel my heartbeat in my head! And I had a headache, which is from a lack of oxygen. I took a double dose of lasix and had to pee every 10 minutes, but I feel better already. I hate living like this, not being able to play with my neice for more than 5 minutes, then having to rest for 10. Or not being able to go up steps without having to stop halfway up or risk completely getting out of breath. It's a shitty feeling, I can't breath deep enough to really help much and my chest hurts and I close my eyes, with my hand over my over-active heart, beating a mile a second, concentrating on breathing in and out. Even buckling up my seatbelt can wear me out, it's pathetic! I just wish I were normal sometimes, or at least not have these issues. I'm going to bed now. Goodnight.
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