never wanted nothin more
alright, here i am.. july > june regarding livejournal entries. promise.
i've been so incredibly sick/blah these past couple days and i'm finally getting over it. I FINALLY HAVE A VOICE AGAIN. thank the lord....alls i did was play on the internet, watch movies, and read twilight. anything that didn't involve talking. Everything is super calm right now, thanks to my whole fam being up north. I got called off of work today (cabana, whoooo...not) which is fine by me. I spent the day playing wii fit, watching a shit ton of E!, and sitting outside istening to music and writing this. Something about summer & country music go hand-in-hand.
I never realized how much I liked him until we were sitting next to each other on a milwaukee county bus, a little tipsy, after summerfest. sitting there laughing, cuddling, drunk-gabbing i realized how happy he makes me, and how everyday i'm just more attracted to him. We're at the same level in so many ways, have the same sense of humor, and plenty of the same ambitions. that's sexy. His six-pack isn't too shabby, either.
i blame phil vassar for being a turning point in our 'whatever'. That was the day he came over with 3-free summerfest tix, and met cora,allie, and chris. I'm pretty sure they liked him....or loved. hahaha. that was everything i needed. He sang and took care of cora when she was passing out. He was the one chris said 'you're my new best friend' to. He was the one allie clearly (yet drunkenly) asked if he had any good looking friends aka his identical twin brother. It was so reassuring...given that with chad everyone clearly hates him. and i'm not using the word 'hate' loosely. We made it to phil vassar and he never left my side, in a good way. He met a million other people, and had a lot of fun.........even though he's not country music's biggest fan. Kudos for phil for playing a full-version of "jesse's girl" hahahaha. :)
On the way out, as we were holding each other up, we saw chad. lovemylife. go figure. allie just grabbed my nand and almost RAN me away. Chris told me later, he was ready to throw a punch..."i would have gotten arrested for you, kayleigh". jesse knows about chad, but chad doesn't know that it's JESSE, just another boy persay. My expression must have said a million words, and jesse just grabs me. "are you okay? he's just an ex, kayleigh". then he kissed my forehead.
after that was said, i realized that is exactly what chad needs to be. After that night i realized how much jesse means to me and i'm not going to damage any of that by any of chad's persuasive blunders. However, chad calls me every other day, texts me approximately 5 times a day to hang out, and goes golfing conveniently everytime i work. this isn't easy. He's saying he got the short-end of the stick, by me not telling him to change and telling him that i was interested in someone else earlier. He would have 'changed'. and now he's trying to 'change.' Hence the phone calls and his need for constant contact. whoa
...sooooooooo i need to get my ass into gear because i need to buy things as in tampons & to get ready so i can go meet jesse somewehere. I'm bringing him home ala hartford. maybe we'll walk the dog together, since my number 1 item on my to-buy list came a convenient 6 hours too soon. i love my life. hah
i've been so incredibly sick/blah these past couple days and i'm finally getting over it. I FINALLY HAVE A VOICE AGAIN. thank the lord....alls i did was play on the internet, watch movies, and read twilight. anything that didn't involve talking. Everything is super calm right now, thanks to my whole fam being up north. I got called off of work today (cabana, whoooo...not) which is fine by me. I spent the day playing wii fit, watching a shit ton of E!, and sitting outside istening to music and writing this. Something about summer & country music go hand-in-hand.
I never realized how much I liked him until we were sitting next to each other on a milwaukee county bus, a little tipsy, after summerfest. sitting there laughing, cuddling, drunk-gabbing i realized how happy he makes me, and how everyday i'm just more attracted to him. We're at the same level in so many ways, have the same sense of humor, and plenty of the same ambitions. that's sexy. His six-pack isn't too shabby, either.
i blame phil vassar for being a turning point in our 'whatever'. That was the day he came over with 3-free summerfest tix, and met cora,allie, and chris. I'm pretty sure they liked him....or loved. hahaha. that was everything i needed. He sang and took care of cora when she was passing out. He was the one chris said 'you're my new best friend' to. He was the one allie clearly (yet drunkenly) asked if he had any good looking friends aka his identical twin brother. It was so reassuring...given that with chad everyone clearly hates him. and i'm not using the word 'hate' loosely. We made it to phil vassar and he never left my side, in a good way. He met a million other people, and had a lot of fun.........even though he's not country music's biggest fan. Kudos for phil for playing a full-version of "jesse's girl" hahahaha. :)
On the way out, as we were holding each other up, we saw chad. lovemylife. go figure. allie just grabbed my nand and almost RAN me away. Chris told me later, he was ready to throw a punch..."i would have gotten arrested for you, kayleigh". jesse knows about chad, but chad doesn't know that it's JESSE, just another boy persay. My expression must have said a million words, and jesse just grabs me. "are you okay? he's just an ex, kayleigh". then he kissed my forehead.
after that was said, i realized that is exactly what chad needs to be. After that night i realized how much jesse means to me and i'm not going to damage any of that by any of chad's persuasive blunders. However, chad calls me every other day, texts me approximately 5 times a day to hang out, and goes golfing conveniently everytime i work. this isn't easy. He's saying he got the short-end of the stick, by me not telling him to change and telling him that i was interested in someone else earlier. He would have 'changed'. and now he's trying to 'change.' Hence the phone calls and his need for constant contact. whoa
...sooooooooo i need to get my ass into gear because i need to buy things as in tampons & to get ready so i can go meet jesse somewehere. I'm bringing him home ala hartford. maybe we'll walk the dog together, since my number 1 item on my to-buy list came a convenient 6 hours too soon. i love my life. hah