Sour grapes- I do not have them.
So the great gentleman boyfriend broke up with me.
Over the phone. VIA A TEXT MESSAGE.
To begin with I was perfectly reasonable. To an extent I still am. I saw him in the plaza today and he was all smily and cheerful and chatty- this made me feel good because I had been worried I'd done something wrong, as he'd not called me for 2 weeks. I messaged him when I got home to ask him if it's okay if I kiss him in public- and he messaged me back to say he wasn't a fan of public affection, but that he's gotten back together with an old girlfriend and he hopes he hasn't hurt my feelings.
BREAKING UP VIA TEXT MESSAGE IS WHAT DOUCHE-BAG CUNT FACES DO. I HATE IT, IT'S COWARDLY.
That was my instant thought. But I sucked it up. I was very level-headed and considerate and told him that I wasn't totally upset about it, my feelings weren't hurt, I really liked him but he wasn't going to be anything long term and it's all for the best, I hoped he and his old flame would be happy. It was all nice, all mature and grown-up. I did add however that breaking up with someone over a text message is shit, but that maybe he had his reasons. Maybe he'd broken up with girls who freaked out, maybe he gets upset about it and apologises too much or cries or something.
He messaged back:
going out? breaking up? don't get it. you're freaking me out now, just leave it. I won't message you again.
WHAT.
WHAT THE FUCK. Of course we were going out, he called it that when we started!! If you're regularly having sex with someone and you've given them permission to call you whenever they like and come over to your house, you're going out, as casual as it is.
I'm annoyed. I'm disappointed. I'm angry. I'm not really sad about it though, not really. He was a great guy to hang out with- up until tonight he'd never said a cross word against me- against anyone! He was a total gentleman. I told you how much of a gentleman he was.
I'm not really upset that we're not going out any more- in fact since this has evolved I'm glad, since it's now obvious that the first decent problem we would've had he would've become an arrogant, self-centred arsehole. I'm going to the UK in May and will be there for a month, maybe more. I hoped I'd find a lovely English boy over there and frankly it's a bit of a relief that I won't be attached when I'm over there. I never saw Mick as a keeper. Last night I realised that what I really want is to settle down, get married. And I never for a moment considered Mick to be a potential in that.
I actually remarked to myself this morning that it was odd I wasn't in love with him. The usual me would be dreaming of moving in together, adoring him from afar, listening to more love songs than usual, all that shit. I was going to send him a Valentine card but I didn't want one that was all lovely dovey, because I don't feel that. He was an attractive guy that I was going out with. I liked him, he liked me. That was it. Maybe we'll get stronger in the future I thought, maybe not. But now is good, and now is all that matters.
I was so FUCKING PROUD OF MYSELF for staying so level-headed and SANE.
What I really am is disappointed. He seemed so great, and it FUCKS ME OFF me to no end that I trustingly went along thinking he was such a lovely person, and then he violently proves it wrong with the kind of attitude I've NEVER seen from anyone. Every crazy boy I've ever known has been more mature than this, even Steve who outright lied and told me we were never more than friends. At least he didn't treat me like some crazy freak stalker. The sensation of disrespect has never been so raw.
It's just kind of fucked when you try to be so grown-up and reasonable, and people shit all over you.
And the worst part? I never did anything wrong. There's nothing I did that deserves this kind of behaviour, not even near it. I couldn't have avoided it. And I can't stand it. I've always been of the opinion that if you're reasonable with people, they'll be reasonable with you.
I guess not.
Over the phone. VIA A TEXT MESSAGE.
To begin with I was perfectly reasonable. To an extent I still am. I saw him in the plaza today and he was all smily and cheerful and chatty- this made me feel good because I had been worried I'd done something wrong, as he'd not called me for 2 weeks. I messaged him when I got home to ask him if it's okay if I kiss him in public- and he messaged me back to say he wasn't a fan of public affection, but that he's gotten back together with an old girlfriend and he hopes he hasn't hurt my feelings.
BREAKING UP VIA TEXT MESSAGE IS WHAT DOUCHE-BAG CUNT FACES DO. I HATE IT, IT'S COWARDLY.
That was my instant thought. But I sucked it up. I was very level-headed and considerate and told him that I wasn't totally upset about it, my feelings weren't hurt, I really liked him but he wasn't going to be anything long term and it's all for the best, I hoped he and his old flame would be happy. It was all nice, all mature and grown-up. I did add however that breaking up with someone over a text message is shit, but that maybe he had his reasons. Maybe he'd broken up with girls who freaked out, maybe he gets upset about it and apologises too much or cries or something.
He messaged back:
going out? breaking up? don't get it. you're freaking me out now, just leave it. I won't message you again.
WHAT.
WHAT THE FUCK. Of course we were going out, he called it that when we started!! If you're regularly having sex with someone and you've given them permission to call you whenever they like and come over to your house, you're going out, as casual as it is.
I'm annoyed. I'm disappointed. I'm angry. I'm not really sad about it though, not really. He was a great guy to hang out with- up until tonight he'd never said a cross word against me- against anyone! He was a total gentleman. I told you how much of a gentleman he was.
I'm not really upset that we're not going out any more- in fact since this has evolved I'm glad, since it's now obvious that the first decent problem we would've had he would've become an arrogant, self-centred arsehole. I'm going to the UK in May and will be there for a month, maybe more. I hoped I'd find a lovely English boy over there and frankly it's a bit of a relief that I won't be attached when I'm over there. I never saw Mick as a keeper. Last night I realised that what I really want is to settle down, get married. And I never for a moment considered Mick to be a potential in that.
I actually remarked to myself this morning that it was odd I wasn't in love with him. The usual me would be dreaming of moving in together, adoring him from afar, listening to more love songs than usual, all that shit. I was going to send him a Valentine card but I didn't want one that was all lovely dovey, because I don't feel that. He was an attractive guy that I was going out with. I liked him, he liked me. That was it. Maybe we'll get stronger in the future I thought, maybe not. But now is good, and now is all that matters.
I was so FUCKING PROUD OF MYSELF for staying so level-headed and SANE.
What I really am is disappointed. He seemed so great, and it FUCKS ME OFF me to no end that I trustingly went along thinking he was such a lovely person, and then he violently proves it wrong with the kind of attitude I've NEVER seen from anyone. Every crazy boy I've ever known has been more mature than this, even Steve who outright lied and told me we were never more than friends. At least he didn't treat me like some crazy freak stalker. The sensation of disrespect has never been so raw.
It's just kind of fucked when you try to be so grown-up and reasonable, and people shit all over you.
And the worst part? I never did anything wrong. There's nothing I did that deserves this kind of behaviour, not even near it. I couldn't have avoided it. And I can't stand it. I've always been of the opinion that if you're reasonable with people, they'll be reasonable with you.
I guess not.