Brain Dead
A friend of mine called late Monday night. His X bf texted him letting him know why he was so sick a few months ago.. He's HIV+.
My friend knows that I work in the HIV field and have dozens of contacts so we planned on going together for his test. My only role would be hand holder.
He took the oral test and sat with me for the 20 minute wait time.
Well, after he had been with the post test councilor for what felt like 45 minutes, I guessed why. The post test councilor asked me to join them in the test room where my friend told me, tears in his eyes what we both sorta knew.
I've been HIV+ for nearly 20 years so feeling numb is more than a way of life but for him, it's all so new. The councilor gave him the basic info and let gave my friend the usual "Were all here to help"
We left that room semi armed with knowledge but having flyers and books can't bring comfort at this news.
Heading to lunch where he didn't eat but one bight he opened up a bit.
Calling his X is on the list of things to do tonight and not blaming him is on the list of topics.
Silently we parted, with the adivice to call me after he calls his X.
Yet I still feel numb, brain dead like. There's countless stories I've been a part of like this one but my friend isn't even 21 years old and that keeps know nawing away at my feelings.
Where did we as a Gay "Community" and HIV prevention people fail my friend and his X? WE didn't!! It happens I keep telling myself.
But I still feel brain dead
My friend knows that I work in the HIV field and have dozens of contacts so we planned on going together for his test. My only role would be hand holder.
He took the oral test and sat with me for the 20 minute wait time.
Well, after he had been with the post test councilor for what felt like 45 minutes, I guessed why. The post test councilor asked me to join them in the test room where my friend told me, tears in his eyes what we both sorta knew.
I've been HIV+ for nearly 20 years so feeling numb is more than a way of life but for him, it's all so new. The councilor gave him the basic info and let gave my friend the usual "Were all here to help"
We left that room semi armed with knowledge but having flyers and books can't bring comfort at this news.
Heading to lunch where he didn't eat but one bight he opened up a bit.
Calling his X is on the list of things to do tonight and not blaming him is on the list of topics.
Silently we parted, with the adivice to call me after he calls his X.
Yet I still feel numb, brain dead like. There's countless stories I've been a part of like this one but my friend isn't even 21 years old and that keeps know nawing away at my feelings.
Where did we as a Gay "Community" and HIV prevention people fail my friend and his X? WE didn't!! It happens I keep telling myself.
But I still feel brain dead