(no subject)
I just finished watching season one of Dexter.
It's a dark show.
I feel guilty calling it good, but I must admit I enjoyed it and am looking forward to season two coming out on DVD.
I've had a rough time of it lately.
My therapist moved away in April.
We thought I would be able to follow her but, for reasons that I still dont understand, that didnt work out.
I have struggled with depression for years.
I walked down the brain numbing path of medication and fought my way back up that path.
Until this year, I had been medication free for about five years.
I guess that's a good thing.
I dont really know anymore.
I still had issues with my depression but I was functioning and fighting.
Last fall a bunch of things, including the end of my nearly three year relationship, pushed me over a new edge.
I decided to go back into therapy.
I dont typically like my therapists.
I dont like spending the first X amount of time defending my decision to not take medication.
I ended up getting assigned to a cognitive behaviorial therapy specialist, who was willing to do art therapy with me.
I felt like things were finally starting to line up.
I actually liked her and trusted her and felt like she had my best interests in mind.
I agreed to go back on medication.
Then she moved.
And I couldnt go with her.
Then my best employee told me he was going to have to leave.
Then I hurt my back.
And it is summer time which is rough on my business since I live in a college town.
I'm stressed out and I'm sad and I'm lonely and when it gets into the small hours I find myself thinking about how easy it would be to take one or two extra of those damn pills that I worked so hard to keep out of my life.
It's a dark show.
I feel guilty calling it good, but I must admit I enjoyed it and am looking forward to season two coming out on DVD.
I've had a rough time of it lately.
My therapist moved away in April.
We thought I would be able to follow her but, for reasons that I still dont understand, that didnt work out.
I have struggled with depression for years.
I walked down the brain numbing path of medication and fought my way back up that path.
Until this year, I had been medication free for about five years.
I guess that's a good thing.
I dont really know anymore.
I still had issues with my depression but I was functioning and fighting.
Last fall a bunch of things, including the end of my nearly three year relationship, pushed me over a new edge.
I decided to go back into therapy.
I dont typically like my therapists.
I dont like spending the first X amount of time defending my decision to not take medication.
I ended up getting assigned to a cognitive behaviorial therapy specialist, who was willing to do art therapy with me.
I felt like things were finally starting to line up.
I actually liked her and trusted her and felt like she had my best interests in mind.
I agreed to go back on medication.
Then she moved.
And I couldnt go with her.
Then my best employee told me he was going to have to leave.
Then I hurt my back.
And it is summer time which is rough on my business since I live in a college town.
I'm stressed out and I'm sad and I'm lonely and when it gets into the small hours I find myself thinking about how easy it would be to take one or two extra of those damn pills that I worked so hard to keep out of my life.