It takes more time than I've ever had, Drains the life from me, Makes me want to forget
Ahh, where to begin well things in my life kind of suck right now. Well I shouldn’t say they completely suck because I have become a lot closer to my friends in the past few months, they have really been there for me thought this whole thing. (To those of you reading, if you know me, you know what im talking about.)
Life sometimes throws you things that you are not prepared for, and you’re just forced to deal with them even if you don’t know how to deal with them. Well I have been trying to deal with my situation; it’s been really hard but im doing it. I miss him very much, but if this is what has to happen right now, I have to deal with it. I have so many fears, and uncertainties and I try to get past them but it’s hard. I hurt so badly, and I just want that hurt to go away but that’s not going to happen any time soon. Sometimes I wish I could just move on, but it’s not an easy thing to do, not when your heart is involved in the situation. I wish things like this would come with instruction manuals, because I really feel like I need one. I feel that I was very naive to not ever think this could happen, and I wish I would have let the thought cross my mind, but I was never given any indication to let the thought cross my mind.
This is really hard for me to write about, but at the same time feels good to let it out. I know I have to become a stronger person, and in many ways I have, but I need to just realize that these things happen, and if something is meant to be it will happen. Everything reminds me of him, and the things we did, how much fun we had together, how nice he always made me feel. I think im going have to put allot of things in my room away, because its just to hard to be reminded of everything on a daily basis. It just sucks, cause this is so hard for, me and probably so easy for him, I’m sure he doesn’t think about it every day like I do.
But from now on, I’m not going to, I cant let myself, I have to get myself back together and just deal with the situation that is in front of me. If I don’t its going to hurt me, I have to may things in my life that are important to let this ruin me, I have school, I cant let this interferer I have come to far in photography to let this hurt me, I have worked so hard. And I have my mom, and my friends they are always there for me, and will always be there for me and I love them so much cause without them, well lets just say id be lost and very alone. So thank you so much. I’m going to get through this I have no choice.
Life sometimes throws you things that you are not prepared for, and you’re just forced to deal with them even if you don’t know how to deal with them. Well I have been trying to deal with my situation; it’s been really hard but im doing it. I miss him very much, but if this is what has to happen right now, I have to deal with it. I have so many fears, and uncertainties and I try to get past them but it’s hard. I hurt so badly, and I just want that hurt to go away but that’s not going to happen any time soon. Sometimes I wish I could just move on, but it’s not an easy thing to do, not when your heart is involved in the situation. I wish things like this would come with instruction manuals, because I really feel like I need one. I feel that I was very naive to not ever think this could happen, and I wish I would have let the thought cross my mind, but I was never given any indication to let the thought cross my mind.
This is really hard for me to write about, but at the same time feels good to let it out. I know I have to become a stronger person, and in many ways I have, but I need to just realize that these things happen, and if something is meant to be it will happen. Everything reminds me of him, and the things we did, how much fun we had together, how nice he always made me feel. I think im going have to put allot of things in my room away, because its just to hard to be reminded of everything on a daily basis. It just sucks, cause this is so hard for, me and probably so easy for him, I’m sure he doesn’t think about it every day like I do.
But from now on, I’m not going to, I cant let myself, I have to get myself back together and just deal with the situation that is in front of me. If I don’t its going to hurt me, I have to may things in my life that are important to let this ruin me, I have school, I cant let this interferer I have come to far in photography to let this hurt me, I have worked so hard. And I have my mom, and my friends they are always there for me, and will always be there for me and I love them so much cause without them, well lets just say id be lost and very alone. So thank you so much. I’m going to get through this I have no choice.