[closed, complete]

[agon_cool_drive]

Another log with Agon? Yes. Active muse is horribly active. :C
Characters: Yukari y_hayasaka & Agon agon_cool_drive
Date/Time: Afternoonish
Location: Yukari's home
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Agon realizes he made a major fuck up and he tries to make something out of himself. Thus what does he do? He goes to Yukari!


Actually Agon had always been able to not care about things but this day proved to be heavy. He could've taken the short road to Zelos' condo, try not to be annoyed with the fact he wasn't there and the indescribable feeling of guilt that kept bugging him about the entire scene in the hospital but he chose metro 11 to take the long way to his own room.
He had crawled into his bed without saying anything to his flatmate Mahiru and slept until...late.

He was worried about the stupid rich trash and everything. And he wished he could all erase it, go back to Tokyo and live his old, carefree and fucking amazing life. Those times nothing was wrong and he just got everything done because he was Kongou fucking Agon and everyone better listened to what he wanted.

He skipped work next day, as well as college and practice. First he planned to just stay in bed but finally he got the faint idea that it would be nice to see Yukari again.
And he could vent to her, because fuck, he wanted to vent. Maybe he could help her too. But mostly that he just wanted to get things off his chest and be somekind of sad in secret.

That's why he decided to show up at her house unnannounced, dressed in baggy jeans, a sweater and a thin coat. Slowly he pressed the doorbell.

At the sound of the doorbell, Yukari let out a long, loud yawn. She'd fallen asleep at Balthier's apartment last night for only a few hours and had apparently missed Vincent before he left for work when she returned home only a short while ago. She supposed with everything going on at Shinra she shouldn't have been surprised about that. And then of course, she was worried sick about Rufus. The news had said he died-- only to correct themselves and confirm he was in a coma. It was better than being dead, surely-- but not by much.

Rising to her feet from the couch, the former model brushed off some bread crumbs from her robe and padded to go answer the door. She was expecting Balthier, or a nosy neighbor to be on the otherside; or maybe Vincent if she was lucky. Opening it, Yukari peeked over, and then blinked. Agon?

"Ah... hello, darling," Yukari tilted her head, pulling the door back completely. "You look terrible," she commented before instantly regretting it. Of course he did, if he was there at Shinra the other day. She was sure all the turks looked that way. Frowning a bit, she made a gesture with her hand. "It's cold out; come in, come in."

Of course the first thing that slipped out of his mouth was the usual 'I'm fine'. Because it always took a while until Agon gave in to the fact everything wasn't fine. And well, she was a bit right, he didn't look too good. A bit pale and he didn't bother to put on cleaner clothes and just picked a few that weren't that dirty.
When she opened the door for him he stepped in, moving to kick off his sneakers and hang his coat away.

"You're okay too...?" he muttered, eyes settling on her belly. She looked a bit drowsy. "...Didn't interrupt you in your beautysleep, right?" Agon grinned faintly, tucking his hands in the pockets of his pants and looking around to admire the interior of Yukari's house. Zelos and her pretty much had the same stylish taste.
It was nice to be around her, he could just fucking relax and feel...remotely happy.

"I'm alright," she replied, giving him a small look of disbelief. He wasn't fine, but maybe he'd clarify that in more detail later. It was impulse to reply otherwise in conversation,.. but for some odd reason Agon had the ability to let out a little more around her.

Shaking her head at his other question, Yukari let out a soft laugh. "I haven't had very much sleep, but I'll take a nap later," she assured him with a flap of her hand. "I'm more so worried about Balthier and... well, everyone at Shinra." she frowned just a moment, leaning back against a nearby chair. "It's a terrible thing that's happened... and to imagine, Basch being the criminal." sighing softly, the model ran a hand through her unbrushed hair and padded towards the kitchen.

"Would you like something to eat?" she asked from the other room, turning on the coffee machine. "Or something to drink?"

He followed her slowly, noticing how tired he still was.
"It was a fucking long day...yeah." he answered, nodding with agreement. "Balthier? Don't know that guy... He is a guy, right? Haa...and stupid rich trash. No wonder he needs us to protect him, geez...dumbass."
It didn't sound very harsh, more worried and a bit frustrated.

The thought of food and drinks made him perk up a little.
"Aaa...sounds like an idea." Agon scratched his scalp and finally followed her to the other room, sitting down on a nearby chair.
"Soup would be nice, I haven't had breakfast yet... Been sleeping most of the day..."

Yukari perked a bit at the mention of soup. She was a terrible cook-- but soup she could do. Shuffling around from the pantry to the fridge and back to the stove, she made small glances at him as he spoke. Despite his words, he sounded...well, worried. It was surprising that Agon even had that function.

"Sleeping, mm?" she repeated as she began opening a package of tofu. "You must've had a long night. Did you stay with Zelos?" she asked curiously, shuffling across the kitchen to find her cutting board and knife.

"I went back to my apartment. Zelos is busy working, I think. When I came home from Tokyo...stupid idiot was waiting for me at the trainstation." A silent and small smile curled around his lips. "It was a fucking long night... Still tired. Never knew this Kyo worked at Shinra as well. And I don't know what the fuck they were thinking to ask me to help that fucking brat with his security-evacuation-thing."

Slowly he got up from the chair he was sitting in to lean over the kitchencounter and grab a bell pepper.
"Hn. I'll chop this one up." he decided before he rummaged around a drawer for a knife.

Yukari smiled a few seconds after he did. "Well, isn't that cute," she commented teasingly, chopping up the tofu and sliding it into the pot. As he grabbed the bell pepper, Yukari raised an eyebrow.

"There's no way you're putting bell peppers in this soup," she said, pointing at him with her knife-- not threateningly, but more as a pointing device. "My mouth would set on fire." She wasn't too fond of peppers as it was-- Vincent on the other hand had an affinity for them. Damn Italians, she thought.

"Ah... so you finally met Kyo," she murmured, returning to stirring the pot. "I do hope you didn't let your mouth run off about you and Zelos," she shook her head. "That'd just be a unwise move on your part," she laughed a moment. "Seeing as you two apparently have to work together every now and again, mm?"

Agon just wanted to make a remark about the fact that a little bit of a spicy aftertaste really wouldn't be too bad in a soup before she started to tell about Kyo.
He put the kitchenknife he finally found down and looked at her.
"Yeah, I've met him... Snarly little bastard. At first I didn't even realized who he was but when I saw the little trash I realized it was the same one Zelos has on a picture somewhere." he said, doubting if he would tell her that he indeed had told Kyo about the things he did with his boyfriend. "Hn, I don't think we will work together..."

Finally Agon grabbed a carrot, frowning.
"This one okay?"

"I'm rather fond of him," Yukari replied with raised eyebrows. "Though you must have a different prespective considering your own ... uh, shall we say colorful character." smiling a moment, Yukari nodded. "I see. He works in security, doesn't he? It's funny that the Turks and the security people don't come in much contact, then..." she stirred a moment, then glanced over at the carrot.

"Of course." she waved a hand, returning to her previous work. "So... that's all that happened? Met each other's acquaintances and never spoke again?"

"There's nothing wrong with my character, I only dislike to have trash around me..." Agon simply said, focussing on chopping the carrot with quick, perfectly timed movements. "We spoke. I don't think Wilder deserves trash like that."
Agon nodded slowly, agreeing with himself this time.

"I bought a shirt for Wilder too...it looks actually fucking good on him."
There was the little smile again and the fucking tingles as well. It really sucked that Zelos had this job and wasn't in town but on the other hand, he prayed that the redhead wouldn't be too pissed about the fact that Agon told Kyo about the things that were going on right now.
"Kyo and I talked a bit...yeah."

"Of course you're going to think that," Yukari replied, turning to lean against the counter with crossed arms. "He's your competition afterall."

Deciding she was a bit too amused with this, she tried to remove the small smile from her lips and listened to him. "A shirt? How sweet of you," inevitably that smile returned. "I'm sure you have impeccable taste," she added, not sure if she was still teasing him or trying to cheer him up.

"Talked about what? Or did you two just bicker, like I'm picturing in my head?" she asked, taking the chopped carrot with one elegant swipe of a hand and dropped it into the soup.

Now Agon chuckled. A bit of a tired and weak chuckle but he was certainly amused.
"Kyo...? Competition? " he snorted, noticing that Yukari was obviously sharing his amusement. "...Ah...fuck no."
Actually, the genius was lying a bit. Kyo was indeed his competition in one way but for everything else...it would probably be pretty easy to just crush the little gingerhead.

"Haaa...I just looked at his fashionsense...Wilder likes tight things...so I bought him a soft tight shirt." He turned around and leaned his back against the kitchencounter. "...We talked... I told him... Actually didn't really want to..." Agon looked up to the ceiling. "...but there was this sudden feeling and I had to..."

"Very observant of you," she replied, moving to get a cup of coffee. Even if it was later on in the day, she wanted her morning cup to get her brain functioning. In the midst of this visit, she still had no idea why Agon had really come. She partially thought she was easy to talk to about his problems, seeing as she was detached from the situation... on the other hand, she somewhat doubted he'd let himself appear that weak.

"Told him what?" she asked, giving him a sideways look. "Surely you didn't tell him you and Zelos..." Yukari paused, her eyes widened. "Right...?"

Agon cleaned his shades with the sleeve of his sweater.
"Hm. He's worth to be looked at...very thoroughly..."

Finally he stuck his shades between his dreadlocks, looking at Yukari.
"It was a bit of...a spur of the moment..." he answered. "...I was standing there, being bored while everyone else was whining about the news and shit, and I figured it was about time to get clearance on this. So I found Kyo and told him, and he answered that I should go fuck myself. Then the greyhaired cranky scumbag came to interfere..."

"Spur of the moment or not, it was stupid," Yukari replied, once again impressed by the lack of common sense this man was deprived of. At the mention of Sephiroth, Yukari lifted her head. "Ironic that he of everyone had to interfere..." she murmured.

"So..." she pushed back a lock of her hair behind her ear, and recrossed her arms. "Zelos, I take it, hasn't heard of this little incident yet." she shook her head. "If I were him, I'd be upset... but then again I'm not Zelos." Still, she had a feeling Zelos planned to tell Kyo on his own terms and time.

Agon pulled a difficult face, lefteye twitching a bit.
"Guess I don't..." the footballer shrugged, moving to peek if the soup was cooking. "...Don't know how to handle this. I had told myself that I would trust Wilder with this. But this Kyo was such an annoying fucking piece of trash...it pissed me off...and..."
It was only half the truth. Because the fear of being left alone was pretty much the cause of all of this.

Oh yeah, he knew for sure Zelos was gonna be mad at him.
"...I need to go back to Tokyo...this fucking shit..."

"Darling..." Yukari sighed, shaking her head. "Don't go thinking you can run away from this. You'd only feel worse." she turned to stir the soup a moment, mentally deciding it would need a minute or so more to cook.

"You and Zelos have been together for longer than I anticipated," she commented, taking a sip of her coffee. "Which means something on his part, too. If you really care about him, you will stick through these times when you don't want to. It'll show him you're willing to make up for your mistakes, even if you're not physically capable of admitting them." she took another sip, and moved to turn off the heat from the pot. "Be a doll and get a couple bowls from that cabinet," she pointed, "Would you please?"

Agon leaned back, a blank expression on his face.
"...Isn't it the best thing to do... Because I feel like crap already. Can't get any worse..."

He sniffled a bit, enjoying the scent of the boiling soup.
"I don't know anything anymore about this. We've been together for three months now...but not one day I could...just say...that just... That I could say 'I'm taken' or this stupid...'I've...got a boyfriend'. And what makes me like men anyways? I mean...fuck...all there was this dumb thought in the back of my head...that he was the one taken...and definitely not by me. Is it wrong for me to..."
Slowly he picked two bowls out of the cabinet, after that he sat down on the ground, knees pulled up.

Yukari was about to start dishing out the soup when she realized Agon had sunk down to the ground. Frowning, she turned a chair towards him and sat down in it, leaning forward, and speaking quietly, "There's nothing wrong with that." she replied honestly.

"To be with someone that you can actually call your own is... well, indescribable." Yukari smiled faintly, a little sadly. "Your frustration is understandable, but you just can't push someone else into working at the same pace as you because of it. He would have--will become yours, just... maybe not as soon as you want him to be."

She sat up straight, and pat his shoulder as she rose back to her feet, returning to the stove to retrieve the pot again. "Come then darling, have some soup."

Agon sighed deeply before he got up, he felt so fucking miserable that his knees shook. Soup sounded nice.
"It must be..." he nodded. "He won't become mine...he won't ever become mine...because I can't shut up...because I still fucking think I can get everything I want. How can I fuck things up like this...? First Hiruma...now...he will be so fucking mad..."

Agon realized he was being not like himself at all and fuck, he just wanted to push this all aside and go on with not caring.
"...It's the same feeling with him...just like with...the blonde scumbag...."

Yukari placed a bowl infront of Agon, pouring some of the steaming soup into it and handed him a spoon. "You mean love," she answered, filling her bowl as well.

Sitting down across from him, the model shook her head. "Certainly things are a mess, but I wouldn't go throwing in the towel now. You are a fighter, aren't you? Stop moping, and start looking for ways to make it better." Yukari sipped her soup and smiled faintly. Maybe she only knew one recipe, but damn it was good.

"Talking to him, for one, might be a good start."

Agon blinked at the word. Who was he kidding anyways? He was in love. Only the word 'love' itself tasted like...there was puke in his mouth. After that he nodded, grinning a bit.
"Wilder will be fucking stubborn and will not speak to me..." he said, moving his spoon through the soup. "...I think...this will be a huge fucking fight... If he would go..."

He took a large sip from his soup, a bit of a determined look on his face.
"...I want to make this love-thing work..."

Yukari smiled at him, feeling proud as if her little brother had won his first baseball match. "That's the spirit, darling."

After taking another few spoonfuls, the model tilted her head at him. "You realize love will involve compromise, don't you? I do hope you're capable of that," she laughed teasingly. She assumed now, that was the main reason he came over. Every time he did, she found herself becoming more and more surprised about the character she discovered beneath his tough outer shell. Moreso, she was surprised that he actually let her see them.

"I don't know shit about this." Agon admitted, knowing so well that he already had said too much and that whatever person he used to be, it wasn't there anymore. He couldn't stop not caring, and the concequences from his actions were pretty much getting through him directly. "I don't know shit about how it is to love... I never had to do so...I had people...loving me...but I never cared to love back. Until I came here, and everything got fucked up!"

The soup was surprisingly nice, it actually soothed him a bit on the inside.
"He deserves...to be treated better then...I did...maybe..."

"Just treat him like an actual person," Yukari offered, twirling her spoon in her soup. She had little sympathy for a man who hadn't any idea what to do. Everyone went through that... maybe his was slightly more severe, considering his ego.

"It's not like anyone goes into a relationship knowing exactly what to do. Just do what you think is right for the both of you, not just yourself." Maybe that was the best advice she could give; that was the biggest thing she had learned. "Now finish up your soup before it goes cold."

"What's right for the both of us...? I think we need to talk..." Agon said while putting the spoon on the table and carefully grabbing the soupbowl to drink directly from it. The warmth felt pleasant.
"I think...he's...really fucking handsome too..."
Ah well, now he was at it, being this much of a wreck, he could at least come clean entirely.

Amused, Yukari couldn't blame him. She'd at first been attracted to Vincent for his looks, probably vice versa for all she knew. "That never hurts," she replied with a smile.

"Do you feel better now?" Yukari asked. "I mean, you don't look so down in the dumps. My soup must have healing powers," she commented, pleased with herself.

"I still feel like crap...but a little bit less..." Agon answered with a smirk, slurping at his soup.
After that he tried to relax, putting the bowl on his table.
"It's fucking funny, I always feel less bothered when I tell you about my fuckups..."

"Clearly I'm amazing, that's why." Yukari replied even though she was staring down at her bowl. "I worry I'm starting to baby you... on the other hand, it's good practice." she laughed shortly, and had another spoonful of soup.

Agon started laughing now, both hands folded around the bowl.
"I don't need to be mothered...it's...nice to have someone listening to me..."

"Well," Yukari yawned, annoyed that the coffee hadn't had much effect. "I'm always here if you need someone to listen. Or scold you, which I'd much rather prefer." She gave him a smile and rose to her feet, removing their bowls from the table to place them in the sink.

Turning to him, she leaned her elbows back against the counter. "I think you have a date with destiny, darling. And I have an important date with my bed for a while. Beauty sleep, as you put it. Pregnant women need as much of it as they possibly can."

Agon stretched his muscles and nodded.
"I should be heading home. Doing groceries...and shit like that..."
Slowly he got up, yawning as well.

"Then it's time for my fucking 'beautysleep' as well" he uttered, tucking his hands deep into the pockets of his pants. "Feel free to come by from time to time."

"I'll remember that," Yukari replied, padding down the hall to fetch his coat. She pulled it out of the closet and handed it to him. "Good. Sleep will make you feel better darling."

She hesitated a moment after her hand opened the door. "And...good luck with Zelos. I'm sure it'll be a bumpy ride, but hang in there."

Agon put his shoes back on and grabbed his coat.
"...Haaa...thanks..." he drawled. "...Fucking bumpy indeed... I don't know if it...can be repaired...but I'll try."

After those words he waved halfly at her and walked out of the door.
It was a relief, but he sure as hell didn't felt happy.