(no subject)
Squirrels are assholes.
I like it hot. While the rest of my family sits in 65 degree air conditioning, I lay outside with layers and layers on. I am a tropical being!!! And so for this reason, I almost DIED.
I woke up at apx. 6 am this morning. At 8:50 I said, "Aye grl. Hungry?" and then I went for my APPLES AND CINNAMON OATMEAL (which was completely delicious by the way) and I COOKED IT in the micro and grabbed a spoon and said, "LETSEATOUTSIDE." and I did. Keep in mind that I look like E.T. right now. I have on a hoodie that is up over my head and then my neck is kind of crooked because of the way I slept and there are bronzer creases everywhere. So I'm pretty much a scary fuck right now.
Now, my backyard has a huge walnut tree. I sat on the stairs that lead to the lower level of the grassy area. I said, "Mmmmdeliciousdelicious." And enjoyed the scenery around me. It was pretty. A walnut fell 2 inches away from me. 2 INCHES1! In case you don't know what a walnut looks like before it is SHUCKED, it is about an inch and a half to two inches in diameter, hard, green, and juicy. When they hit the ground they make huge thud sounds and shake the earth's magma core. At this point I'm pretty shocked. I decide to not move, but at a last minutes decision I moved up to the concrete area and sit on a nice BENCH. It was lovely. I had vines behind me, I had a good view of the walnut tree. Life was good. I was eating my oats!! Then, right where I was sitting before, not one, BUT THREE walnuts fall IN UNISON exactly where I was. When does that happen?
This one time when I was laying out a walnut hit me in my forehead. Thank gloria that I had bangs to cover that one up! hhahahahahahaha.
I like it hot. While the rest of my family sits in 65 degree air conditioning, I lay outside with layers and layers on. I am a tropical being!!! And so for this reason, I almost DIED.
I woke up at apx. 6 am this morning. At 8:50 I said, "Aye grl. Hungry?" and then I went for my APPLES AND CINNAMON OATMEAL (which was completely delicious by the way) and I COOKED IT in the micro and grabbed a spoon and said, "LETSEATOUTSIDE." and I did. Keep in mind that I look like E.T. right now. I have on a hoodie that is up over my head and then my neck is kind of crooked because of the way I slept and there are bronzer creases everywhere. So I'm pretty much a scary fuck right now.
Now, my backyard has a huge walnut tree. I sat on the stairs that lead to the lower level of the grassy area. I said, "Mmmmdeliciousdelicious." And enjoyed the scenery around me. It was pretty. A walnut fell 2 inches away from me. 2 INCHES1! In case you don't know what a walnut looks like before it is SHUCKED, it is about an inch and a half to two inches in diameter, hard, green, and juicy. When they hit the ground they make huge thud sounds and shake the earth's magma core. At this point I'm pretty shocked. I decide to not move, but at a last minutes decision I moved up to the concrete area and sit on a nice BENCH. It was lovely. I had vines behind me, I had a good view of the walnut tree. Life was good. I was eating my oats!! Then, right where I was sitting before, not one, BUT THREE walnuts fall IN UNISON exactly where I was. When does that happen?
This one time when I was laying out a walnut hit me in my forehead. Thank gloria that I had bangs to cover that one up! hhahahahahahaha.