fic: Jagged Little Pill
Title: Jagged Little Pill
Genre: Jared/Jensen
Rating: nc-17
Word Count: 2k
Notes: written for this prompt over at spn_masquerade. (yes, it's taking me forever to claim all of these) warnings for non-con, roofies, mental instability, somnophilia.
Summary: Jared really does love him. He says so all the time.
Jared really does love him. He says so all the time.
Love you, man.
Love you, bro.
The man and the bro are the problem. Jensen has the solution, small and chalky and tucked safely in his wallet behind his student ID.
***
Jared's beautiful, smart, comfortable in his own skin. He's everything that Jensen isn't and everybody loves him for it, from the girls he brings to their room to the boys who wish he would.
They don't know him though. Not like Jensen knows him. Everyone looks but only Jensen gets to see.
The library's basement study hall is empty. Jensen finds his favorite spot, puts his back to the corner, tears open five sugar packets and pours them into Jared's coffee. Jared likes it sweet and anyway, it'll cover up the taste.
***
"Have you heard about this?" Jared shoves a flyer under Jensen's nose, hot pink and clearly run off at a Kinko's somewhere. An underground party in the basement of some abandoned warehouse across town, the address spelled out in spiky felt-tipped marker.
Jensen shakes his head, not surprised. It's Jared that they want. They always want him, but it's Jensen who gets to have him, deep down and in all the ways that matter.
"You wanna?" Jared hooks his arm around Jensen's neck, grabs the coffee Jensen's holding out for him and takes a long sip. He huffs coffee breath in Jensen's face, rubs his knuckles against the short hair at the base of Jensen's skull and Jensen falls in love with him for the tenth time today.
"Don't really feel like spending ten bucks to hang out in some leaky basement and get all sweaty grinding up against other people who are also all sweaty from grinding up against everyone else." Jensen lets himself lean into Jared the smallest amount.
"What if I spotted you the ten bucks?" Jared's smile is sweetly innocent, and angel waiting for his halo to explode.
"I never said that I wasn't gonna go."
A small jostle and Jared releases him. "That's my boy." He's blinking slower, speech already a little slurred. The look he gives Jensen is warm, adorably dopey, threaded through with affection.
Jared knows that no one loves him as well as Jensen does, on some level his mind understands that. Jensen just has to wait for Jared's body to catch up.
"Finish your homework," Jensen says, and sinks onto Jared's bed, curls on his side. It smells better than Jensen's, smells like Jared and besides, neither of them are particularly territorial. "Drink your coffee before it goes cold."
***
Two minutes after Jared's finished his coffee, his center of balance topples, his speech turns mushy and his eyes swim, roll up under his lids. He staggers to his feet.
"I--fuck. Jensen," he starts, eyes slitted, blindly groping for his bed, searching for Jensen and Jensen's right there. He's always going to be right there.
"Everything's okay. Everything's gonna be okay." Jensen guides him to the bed, Jared's skin sweaty and warm through his t-shirt. He props Jared up on his side, stabilizes him with some pillows at his back then goes to the showers.
It's a big night for them, and Jensen wants to look his best.
***
The lights are turned down low, quiet electronica pipes through the stereo and Jensen's standing with his back against the locked door, his towel in a puddle around his feet and his skin scrubbed clean.
Jared's on his side, one arm outstretched, fingers curved slightly, beckoning Jensen closer, and Jensen's never been able to say no to Jared, not when it really counts.
"You're still sweating," Jensen says to him. "Let me help you."
Jensen pulls Jared up by the shoulders and Jared falls into him, his face nestled into the crook of Jensen's neck and his lips snagging across Jensen's skin and that's not a proper first kiss at all. They can do better than that, but first Jensen slips Jared's damp shirt over his head, off of arms that are loose and limp as a rag doll. He eases Jared back down and kneels over him.
It's not the first time Jensen's seen him without his shirt, but it's the first time he's been allowed to stare openly, to touch. His chest is toned but not too bulky, his nipples dark little nubs that tighten when Jensen rubs his thumbs over them, teases them between his fingers. Jared's skin is tanned, almost golden in the dim light. His chest rises and falls evenly and his face is smooth, open, so trusting.
Jared's legs have fallen open, a perfect cradle for Jensen to rest in, so he does, and lays his head on Jared's chest, listens to the steady beat of his heart and then slides upward, pushing Jared's legs wider as he goes.
One small touch to his cheek and Jared's lips part, he sighs quietly, a tiny, happy sound. There's flickering movement beneath his closed eyelids.
"I know," Jensen says, "me too." He kisses one corner of Jared's mouth and moves onto the other, then finally, finally, Jensen kisses him dead center, slips his tongue inside and it's so warm in there. So slick, as Jensen licks along Jared's teeth, tastes the shape of them. He sucks on Jared's lips and Jared squirms some underneath him, gasps a shivery breath.
"We've waited so long, haven't we?" Jensen says, voice tight and restrained. He begins moving against Jared, his cock dragging and rolling against Jared's slippery shorts. Jensen's cock is leaking, incredibly damp down there, and he backs off, remembers that he shouldn't make a mess of Jared's pants like that.
Skin pebbling when he loses contact with Jared's heat, Jensen pulls back. He makes himself count to ten, allows the anticipation to build then slides Jared's shorts down and off. The whole of Jared laid bare before him is nearly more than he can take. Acres of taut flesh on display, Jared so patient and waiting for him.
Jensen starts at Jared's ankle, kisses and licks his way up to his calf, the tender flesh of Jared's inner thigh, shows Jared how good his mouth can feel as he pushes Jared's legs apart. Jared's cock is nestled in the cut of his thigh, limp but still long and thick and Jensen's stomach jumps as he thinks about the potential, how it'll feel once Jared figures it all out, once he knows. Jensen noses at Jared's sac, his pubes, groans as he breathes in the essential scent of Jared, sweaty, bitter and sweet at the same time.
"Can I?" Jensen asks, glancing up the length of Jared's body to find Jared's lips moving without sound. Smiling, Jensen says, "Thank you," and rears up to his knees, finds the bottle of lube he'd stashed beneath Jared's pillow, just in case.
Loose and relaxed the way they are, Jared's legs keep falling down, so Jensen hooks them over his shoulders, tips forward a bit to spread them wide, slicks his fingers and rubs them together to warm up the lube. It might be easier if he helps Jared flip over, but Jensen isn't above a small amount of selfishness, wants to be able to watch Jared's face when he pushes one finger past the tightness of Jared's hole.
A line forms between Jared's eyebrows, his mouth shapes into the most adorable pout as Jensen slides his finger deeper and twists his wrist, withdraws his hand to drizzle more lube right onto Jared's rim. It's easier the second time he presses in, slicker, less resistance.
"It burns some, I know," Jensen tells him, his voice beginning to lose some of its evenness. "Give it a minute." He adds a second finger and Jared sighs, and the sound of it makes Jensen's dick even harder, makes a fresh stream of precome drip down his shaft. Biting his lip, suddenly shy, Jensen says, "Do you know how many times I've done this? How many times I've made it up to three, and gotten off on just that? Just thinking about you?"
His hand is moving faster now. Jared's good at this, loosening up so quick, ready for the third finger now. His body is learning, catching up with his mind and it's as if Jared's sucking him in, drawing Jensen's fingers deeper with every push, asking for more.
"I'll tell you a secret. One time I even made it up to four. Right here in your bed. Shot all over those silk boxers of yours. You know the ones that went missing last month?"
Jared sighs again, low and throaty. This time it sounds like forgiveness, and Jensen has to squeeze his dick at the base, tug on his balls to hold back his orgasm.
Jared's rim is puffy, flushed pink and incredibly wet, wetter still as Jensen rubs the head of his dick against it, mixes his precome with the lube then bears down. One of Jared's legs slides from his shoulder and Jensen catches it, folds it around his waist and swears he feels Jared flex it, nudge him forward. Invitation and demand and Jensen has to give Jared what he needs. It's how he's wired, the one thing about him that isn't faulty.
All sensation zeroes in on the stretch of Jared's body around his dick, the cloying heat and the tight drag of Jared's rim, the needy, wanting sound that's punched out of Jared's throat once Jensen bottoms out. Jensen blankets Jared's body with his own, immediately weak, his head swimming and his heartbeat very loud in his ears because he's here. Jensen's eyes are burning and they fit so well. Jared opens for him, makes a space for him inside and out as Jensen rocks into him. It's stilted and stuttering and entirely without grace, his fists sunk into Jared's hair and his mouth open on Jared's throat.
"Can you see it now? God, Jared. Can you see?" Jensen thrusts into Jared and it's so good, better than every single one of Jensen's impossible daydreams, and then Jared mutters something, mostly lost in the white rush of Jensen's pulse, but it sounds a little like Jensen's name.
His fucking name, and before it's too late, Jensen pulls out and sits back, his dick a searing slap against his stomach. He takes Jared by the wrist, tangles their fingers together and wraps them around his dick. It's mostly an afterthought. He's already coming, thick white ropes of spunk all over their fingers, more of it landing on Jared's stomach, his ribs, dripping down to fill up his navel.
"I've made a mess of you," Jensen says once he can breathe again. "It's only fair, I suppose." He runs his index finger through the cooling come on Jared's chest. "You've made a mess of me too. At least I can clean up one of them."
***
"Fuck," Jared says, and shuffles stiff-legged across the room. "Feels like I've been hit by a goddamn train. What happened?"
Jensen watches him. The changes are there. Jensen sees them when he looks closely enough. "What do you remember?"
Falling into Jensen's bed, Jared says, "Doing my trig homework, wanting to go to that party." His eyes flicker back and forth, like the rest of the answer is written somewhere on the ceiling.
Jared's shoulder is warm against Jensen's, and Jensen thinks he can still smell himself on Jared's skin whenever he breathes deeply. "We went," Jensen tells him. Simplicity is key. "I think someone put something in your drink. I lugged you home. Put you to bed."
"Shit," Jared says, and rubs his knuckles on Jensen's thigh, knocks their feet together. "Thanks. Don't know where I'd be without you. Love you, bro."
Mentally, Jensen erases the bro. It's simple. He does it all the time. "I know."
--end
Thanks for reading!
Genre: Jared/Jensen
Rating: nc-17
Word Count: 2k
Notes: written for this prompt over at spn_masquerade. (yes, it's taking me forever to claim all of these) warnings for non-con, roofies, mental instability, somnophilia.
Summary: Jared really does love him. He says so all the time.
Jared really does love him. He says so all the time.
Love you, man.
Love you, bro.
The man and the bro are the problem. Jensen has the solution, small and chalky and tucked safely in his wallet behind his student ID.
***
Jared's beautiful, smart, comfortable in his own skin. He's everything that Jensen isn't and everybody loves him for it, from the girls he brings to their room to the boys who wish he would.
They don't know him though. Not like Jensen knows him. Everyone looks but only Jensen gets to see.
The library's basement study hall is empty. Jensen finds his favorite spot, puts his back to the corner, tears open five sugar packets and pours them into Jared's coffee. Jared likes it sweet and anyway, it'll cover up the taste.
***
"Have you heard about this?" Jared shoves a flyer under Jensen's nose, hot pink and clearly run off at a Kinko's somewhere. An underground party in the basement of some abandoned warehouse across town, the address spelled out in spiky felt-tipped marker.
Jensen shakes his head, not surprised. It's Jared that they want. They always want him, but it's Jensen who gets to have him, deep down and in all the ways that matter.
"You wanna?" Jared hooks his arm around Jensen's neck, grabs the coffee Jensen's holding out for him and takes a long sip. He huffs coffee breath in Jensen's face, rubs his knuckles against the short hair at the base of Jensen's skull and Jensen falls in love with him for the tenth time today.
"Don't really feel like spending ten bucks to hang out in some leaky basement and get all sweaty grinding up against other people who are also all sweaty from grinding up against everyone else." Jensen lets himself lean into Jared the smallest amount.
"What if I spotted you the ten bucks?" Jared's smile is sweetly innocent, and angel waiting for his halo to explode.
"I never said that I wasn't gonna go."
A small jostle and Jared releases him. "That's my boy." He's blinking slower, speech already a little slurred. The look he gives Jensen is warm, adorably dopey, threaded through with affection.
Jared knows that no one loves him as well as Jensen does, on some level his mind understands that. Jensen just has to wait for Jared's body to catch up.
"Finish your homework," Jensen says, and sinks onto Jared's bed, curls on his side. It smells better than Jensen's, smells like Jared and besides, neither of them are particularly territorial. "Drink your coffee before it goes cold."
***
Two minutes after Jared's finished his coffee, his center of balance topples, his speech turns mushy and his eyes swim, roll up under his lids. He staggers to his feet.
"I--fuck. Jensen," he starts, eyes slitted, blindly groping for his bed, searching for Jensen and Jensen's right there. He's always going to be right there.
"Everything's okay. Everything's gonna be okay." Jensen guides him to the bed, Jared's skin sweaty and warm through his t-shirt. He props Jared up on his side, stabilizes him with some pillows at his back then goes to the showers.
It's a big night for them, and Jensen wants to look his best.
***
The lights are turned down low, quiet electronica pipes through the stereo and Jensen's standing with his back against the locked door, his towel in a puddle around his feet and his skin scrubbed clean.
Jared's on his side, one arm outstretched, fingers curved slightly, beckoning Jensen closer, and Jensen's never been able to say no to Jared, not when it really counts.
"You're still sweating," Jensen says to him. "Let me help you."
Jensen pulls Jared up by the shoulders and Jared falls into him, his face nestled into the crook of Jensen's neck and his lips snagging across Jensen's skin and that's not a proper first kiss at all. They can do better than that, but first Jensen slips Jared's damp shirt over his head, off of arms that are loose and limp as a rag doll. He eases Jared back down and kneels over him.
It's not the first time Jensen's seen him without his shirt, but it's the first time he's been allowed to stare openly, to touch. His chest is toned but not too bulky, his nipples dark little nubs that tighten when Jensen rubs his thumbs over them, teases them between his fingers. Jared's skin is tanned, almost golden in the dim light. His chest rises and falls evenly and his face is smooth, open, so trusting.
Jared's legs have fallen open, a perfect cradle for Jensen to rest in, so he does, and lays his head on Jared's chest, listens to the steady beat of his heart and then slides upward, pushing Jared's legs wider as he goes.
One small touch to his cheek and Jared's lips part, he sighs quietly, a tiny, happy sound. There's flickering movement beneath his closed eyelids.
"I know," Jensen says, "me too." He kisses one corner of Jared's mouth and moves onto the other, then finally, finally, Jensen kisses him dead center, slips his tongue inside and it's so warm in there. So slick, as Jensen licks along Jared's teeth, tastes the shape of them. He sucks on Jared's lips and Jared squirms some underneath him, gasps a shivery breath.
"We've waited so long, haven't we?" Jensen says, voice tight and restrained. He begins moving against Jared, his cock dragging and rolling against Jared's slippery shorts. Jensen's cock is leaking, incredibly damp down there, and he backs off, remembers that he shouldn't make a mess of Jared's pants like that.
Skin pebbling when he loses contact with Jared's heat, Jensen pulls back. He makes himself count to ten, allows the anticipation to build then slides Jared's shorts down and off. The whole of Jared laid bare before him is nearly more than he can take. Acres of taut flesh on display, Jared so patient and waiting for him.
Jensen starts at Jared's ankle, kisses and licks his way up to his calf, the tender flesh of Jared's inner thigh, shows Jared how good his mouth can feel as he pushes Jared's legs apart. Jared's cock is nestled in the cut of his thigh, limp but still long and thick and Jensen's stomach jumps as he thinks about the potential, how it'll feel once Jared figures it all out, once he knows. Jensen noses at Jared's sac, his pubes, groans as he breathes in the essential scent of Jared, sweaty, bitter and sweet at the same time.
"Can I?" Jensen asks, glancing up the length of Jared's body to find Jared's lips moving without sound. Smiling, Jensen says, "Thank you," and rears up to his knees, finds the bottle of lube he'd stashed beneath Jared's pillow, just in case.
Loose and relaxed the way they are, Jared's legs keep falling down, so Jensen hooks them over his shoulders, tips forward a bit to spread them wide, slicks his fingers and rubs them together to warm up the lube. It might be easier if he helps Jared flip over, but Jensen isn't above a small amount of selfishness, wants to be able to watch Jared's face when he pushes one finger past the tightness of Jared's hole.
A line forms between Jared's eyebrows, his mouth shapes into the most adorable pout as Jensen slides his finger deeper and twists his wrist, withdraws his hand to drizzle more lube right onto Jared's rim. It's easier the second time he presses in, slicker, less resistance.
"It burns some, I know," Jensen tells him, his voice beginning to lose some of its evenness. "Give it a minute." He adds a second finger and Jared sighs, and the sound of it makes Jensen's dick even harder, makes a fresh stream of precome drip down his shaft. Biting his lip, suddenly shy, Jensen says, "Do you know how many times I've done this? How many times I've made it up to three, and gotten off on just that? Just thinking about you?"
His hand is moving faster now. Jared's good at this, loosening up so quick, ready for the third finger now. His body is learning, catching up with his mind and it's as if Jared's sucking him in, drawing Jensen's fingers deeper with every push, asking for more.
"I'll tell you a secret. One time I even made it up to four. Right here in your bed. Shot all over those silk boxers of yours. You know the ones that went missing last month?"
Jared sighs again, low and throaty. This time it sounds like forgiveness, and Jensen has to squeeze his dick at the base, tug on his balls to hold back his orgasm.
Jared's rim is puffy, flushed pink and incredibly wet, wetter still as Jensen rubs the head of his dick against it, mixes his precome with the lube then bears down. One of Jared's legs slides from his shoulder and Jensen catches it, folds it around his waist and swears he feels Jared flex it, nudge him forward. Invitation and demand and Jensen has to give Jared what he needs. It's how he's wired, the one thing about him that isn't faulty.
All sensation zeroes in on the stretch of Jared's body around his dick, the cloying heat and the tight drag of Jared's rim, the needy, wanting sound that's punched out of Jared's throat once Jensen bottoms out. Jensen blankets Jared's body with his own, immediately weak, his head swimming and his heartbeat very loud in his ears because he's here. Jensen's eyes are burning and they fit so well. Jared opens for him, makes a space for him inside and out as Jensen rocks into him. It's stilted and stuttering and entirely without grace, his fists sunk into Jared's hair and his mouth open on Jared's throat.
"Can you see it now? God, Jared. Can you see?" Jensen thrusts into Jared and it's so good, better than every single one of Jensen's impossible daydreams, and then Jared mutters something, mostly lost in the white rush of Jensen's pulse, but it sounds a little like Jensen's name.
His fucking name, and before it's too late, Jensen pulls out and sits back, his dick a searing slap against his stomach. He takes Jared by the wrist, tangles their fingers together and wraps them around his dick. It's mostly an afterthought. He's already coming, thick white ropes of spunk all over their fingers, more of it landing on Jared's stomach, his ribs, dripping down to fill up his navel.
"I've made a mess of you," Jensen says once he can breathe again. "It's only fair, I suppose." He runs his index finger through the cooling come on Jared's chest. "You've made a mess of me too. At least I can clean up one of them."
***
"Fuck," Jared says, and shuffles stiff-legged across the room. "Feels like I've been hit by a goddamn train. What happened?"
Jensen watches him. The changes are there. Jensen sees them when he looks closely enough. "What do you remember?"
Falling into Jensen's bed, Jared says, "Doing my trig homework, wanting to go to that party." His eyes flicker back and forth, like the rest of the answer is written somewhere on the ceiling.
Jared's shoulder is warm against Jensen's, and Jensen thinks he can still smell himself on Jared's skin whenever he breathes deeply. "We went," Jensen tells him. Simplicity is key. "I think someone put something in your drink. I lugged you home. Put you to bed."
"Shit," Jared says, and rubs his knuckles on Jensen's thigh, knocks their feet together. "Thanks. Don't know where I'd be without you. Love you, bro."
Mentally, Jensen erases the bro. It's simple. He does it all the time. "I know."
--end
Thanks for reading!