(no subject)
I use very little makeup, but I make a point of buying what I do at the same time as the clinique counter near my office has its "free gift" [how is it free if you have to spend $25 to get it?] promotions twice a year. I'm just a sucker for them. It gives me license to experiment with new products, since if they don't suit me I can say "It's not as if I spent money on them!" As a result, I have a small bag of products I actually use, and a much larger bag of those that I tried on once. But I hate to throw them away. So today I mailed them to my sister Sheryle in Oregon. It's her birthday on Saturday, so why not? We're not close; I usually don't get her anything at all.
Now, this might seem like an exceedingly lame gift at first glance. My friends are all well-off enough that offering them my cast-offs would seem weird and possibly insulting. My sister, on the other hand, is a mother of three with low self-esteem and virtually no money; she never spends any money on herself except for alcohol and cigarettes. She's probably spent $25 on cosmetics in the last 7 years. Maybe. And she would never dream of buying herself anything as "nice" as clinique (or any other brand not sold at walgreens).
Any interactions with my sisters bring the whole class issue right front and center. That's part of the reason I avoid it. We were never close, since they're 5 and 7 years older than me, but interacting with them is like communicating across an abyss. We may have grown up (at least part of the time) in the same household, but we took very different paths and developed very different values. From poor beginnings, I ended up middle class and they ended up white trash. I'm speaking here less of actual money than of values. My mother always told me there was no shame in being poor, only in being trashy. The difference is about respect--for yourself and for others. "white trash" is laying on the couch hollering at your child playing outside to get you a goddam cigarette, when they're sitting on a table across the room. To this day, I haven't resolved how I feel about this, and what my responsibilities are (aside from providing a role model for my nieces and nephews). It's easier to just not think about it, and by extension, not talk to them.
Now, this might seem like an exceedingly lame gift at first glance. My friends are all well-off enough that offering them my cast-offs would seem weird and possibly insulting. My sister, on the other hand, is a mother of three with low self-esteem and virtually no money; she never spends any money on herself except for alcohol and cigarettes. She's probably spent $25 on cosmetics in the last 7 years. Maybe. And she would never dream of buying herself anything as "nice" as clinique (or any other brand not sold at walgreens).
Any interactions with my sisters bring the whole class issue right front and center. That's part of the reason I avoid it. We were never close, since they're 5 and 7 years older than me, but interacting with them is like communicating across an abyss. We may have grown up (at least part of the time) in the same household, but we took very different paths and developed very different values. From poor beginnings, I ended up middle class and they ended up white trash. I'm speaking here less of actual money than of values. My mother always told me there was no shame in being poor, only in being trashy. The difference is about respect--for yourself and for others. "white trash" is laying on the couch hollering at your child playing outside to get you a goddam cigarette, when they're sitting on a table across the room. To this day, I haven't resolved how I feel about this, and what my responsibilities are (aside from providing a role model for my nieces and nephews). It's easier to just not think about it, and by extension, not talk to them.