(no subject)
I am dealing with my current level of overwhelm with the state of the world by watching children's programming on public television. My favorite is the one where two cute guys alternate between talking to their friendly neighborhood lemur about animal behavior and falling off their bicycles as they ride around the world looking at animals in their natural habitats. oh, and kids, never touch an animal creature unless an adult says it's ok.
Also playing myriad games of Angry Birds and Doodle Jump on my ipod. The Doodle Jump homage to World Cup Soccer is the closest I'm going to get to paying that particular extravaganza of sports any attention this year. And Angry Birds is turning out to be surprisingly good at quelling my urges to break things when I'm processing anger. One more way that I am a tad odd.
still living in the ow, but it's much more manageable/tolerable this week. this may or may not have anything to do with switching from stuffing to processing said anger. there is still something of a tightrope to be walked in that process when one's ability to participate in the world (re: access) depends on the good will of others, but it's also fascinating to realize how different i feel when the anger is put on the outside, not the inside.
this also has me thinking about something I've noticed in Quaker circles, the tendency to equate anger with violence. I'm finding it important/useful to look at anger as a signal my brain/body sends me (same as jealousy or pleasure or pain) that I can then use as an opportunity to come to understandings and make choices. Violence (inward or outward) is a choice and most of us are able to live lives where it is not the only choice or even the first one. But when we equate violence with anger in the process of professing/teaching peace, we ignore and invalidate the transformative properties of anger--particularly its ability to jump start the process of instigating change--and the important role it plays in moving someone to speak truth to power. To reduce the violence in this world, we need to be creating ways for ourselves to stop being afraid of anger (because violence is also very rooted in fear) and instead honor the messages it brings us without out giving it power beyond that which it deserves, to figure out how to use anger to create rather than destroy.
that probably needs some refining, but that's where I'm at with it at the moment (open to discussion about it, as well).
there is also yarn and chocolate and a quesadilla with cheddar, salsa and salt cured olives. sunshine coming through the skylight (more than i really enjoy) and the wonder of sitting in front of a fan. or the window. it's windy enough today that up here in the tree house/attic, the curtains are flags whipping back and forth.
Attended a rather pleasant meeting of the local organization of artists with disabilities last night. Often these meetings are so arduous that even knitting through them is not enough to keep me there, but this one was kind of magical. We may have actually found a format that will both keep people involved and allow us to get business done. I wish we could be more consensus based than rules of order but I know better than to even mention that. chaos is not useful in this situation. chaos (and lack of access) is what kept me away for years. If we can keep the balance we had last night, I'll continue to participate. Also, I shared some of my visual art last night (I don't usually identify as a visual artist, but I am) even after three rather accomplished visual artists has shared their work, and got feedback that was both positive and useful. makes me want to frame a couple of the best of the ink drawings and start submitting them for exhibit. or however that works.
and knitting. the mitten making has slowed for the time being, replaced by construction of a couple of creatures Unlikely Lass refers to as "buddies" and i think of affectionately as monsters. I promise there will be pictures soon. I just need to finish one first.
Also playing myriad games of Angry Birds and Doodle Jump on my ipod. The Doodle Jump homage to World Cup Soccer is the closest I'm going to get to paying that particular extravaganza of sports any attention this year. And Angry Birds is turning out to be surprisingly good at quelling my urges to break things when I'm processing anger. One more way that I am a tad odd.
still living in the ow, but it's much more manageable/tolerable this week. this may or may not have anything to do with switching from stuffing to processing said anger. there is still something of a tightrope to be walked in that process when one's ability to participate in the world (re: access) depends on the good will of others, but it's also fascinating to realize how different i feel when the anger is put on the outside, not the inside.
this also has me thinking about something I've noticed in Quaker circles, the tendency to equate anger with violence. I'm finding it important/useful to look at anger as a signal my brain/body sends me (same as jealousy or pleasure or pain) that I can then use as an opportunity to come to understandings and make choices. Violence (inward or outward) is a choice and most of us are able to live lives where it is not the only choice or even the first one. But when we equate violence with anger in the process of professing/teaching peace, we ignore and invalidate the transformative properties of anger--particularly its ability to jump start the process of instigating change--and the important role it plays in moving someone to speak truth to power. To reduce the violence in this world, we need to be creating ways for ourselves to stop being afraid of anger (because violence is also very rooted in fear) and instead honor the messages it brings us without out giving it power beyond that which it deserves, to figure out how to use anger to create rather than destroy.
that probably needs some refining, but that's where I'm at with it at the moment (open to discussion about it, as well).
there is also yarn and chocolate and a quesadilla with cheddar, salsa and salt cured olives. sunshine coming through the skylight (more than i really enjoy) and the wonder of sitting in front of a fan. or the window. it's windy enough today that up here in the tree house/attic, the curtains are flags whipping back and forth.
Attended a rather pleasant meeting of the local organization of artists with disabilities last night. Often these meetings are so arduous that even knitting through them is not enough to keep me there, but this one was kind of magical. We may have actually found a format that will both keep people involved and allow us to get business done. I wish we could be more consensus based than rules of order but I know better than to even mention that. chaos is not useful in this situation. chaos (and lack of access) is what kept me away for years. If we can keep the balance we had last night, I'll continue to participate. Also, I shared some of my visual art last night (I don't usually identify as a visual artist, but I am) even after three rather accomplished visual artists has shared their work, and got feedback that was both positive and useful. makes me want to frame a couple of the best of the ink drawings and start submitting them for exhibit. or however that works.
and knitting. the mitten making has slowed for the time being, replaced by construction of a couple of creatures Unlikely Lass refers to as "buddies" and i think of affectionately as monsters. I promise there will be pictures soon. I just need to finish one first.