(no subject)
Its a beautiful day out, and still I'm freaking depressed..I don't expect anyone to respond..I guess I just need to write and get all of my feelings out..
I just have been feeling completely worthless lately..I feel like, I've become this stuck up bitch who doesn't need anyone..I'm probably going to grow old all by myself in this big house..i'm like, that lady with all the cats, but I won't have cats, cause i'm allergic to them..
I feel like I've worked so hard, and for what? Long strenuous hours in the field, hiking up to ten miles everyday, sleeping in tents everynight, being bitched at, collecting data, writing up reports, dealing with shitty ass people, and making like, 40 bucks a day...fuck..I can't live off of that..I would have been better off staying at bj's...I would have had a managers position in no time...401 k..benefits..the works..everyone loved me..now it's like, I'm a complete loser...I have no friends, I go out and drink all the time at bars to listen to music and get hit on by complete losers...what is my life coming to? All of this because I have to prove to the world that I'm not a complete failure, and I can do it..yeah, maybe I'm not going to vet school, but I'll feel like I will have accomplished something in the end...hopefully...
So heres the perfect job for me: Prescribed fire burning-I get to play with fire all day...funtimes..
I just have been feeling completely worthless lately..I feel like, I've become this stuck up bitch who doesn't need anyone..I'm probably going to grow old all by myself in this big house..i'm like, that lady with all the cats, but I won't have cats, cause i'm allergic to them..
I feel like I've worked so hard, and for what? Long strenuous hours in the field, hiking up to ten miles everyday, sleeping in tents everynight, being bitched at, collecting data, writing up reports, dealing with shitty ass people, and making like, 40 bucks a day...fuck..I can't live off of that..I would have been better off staying at bj's...I would have had a managers position in no time...401 k..benefits..the works..everyone loved me..now it's like, I'm a complete loser...I have no friends, I go out and drink all the time at bars to listen to music and get hit on by complete losers...what is my life coming to? All of this because I have to prove to the world that I'm not a complete failure, and I can do it..yeah, maybe I'm not going to vet school, but I'll feel like I will have accomplished something in the end...hopefully...
So heres the perfect job for me: Prescribed fire burning-I get to play with fire all day...funtimes..