Comments | rivelata: 1 Spade

beepbeep_meow in rivelata

1 Spade

Oct 10, 2010 02:28

ALRIGHT, I GUESS THE BEST WAY TO GO ABOUT DEALING WITH THIS MOBIUS DOUBLE CLUSTERFUCK OF A SITUATION IS FOR ME TO LIST THE FACTS. OH BOY. AS IF THIS SHIT DIDN'T MAKE ME FEEL BAD ENOUGH, I ACTUALLY HAVE TO WRITE THIS BY HAND. WHO'S FUCKING BRIGHT IDEA WAS IT TO SEND ME SOMEWHERE WITHOUT A COMPUTER? HOW THE HELL AM I EVEN SUPPOSED TO COMMUNICATE ( Read more... )

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BEST PLAN EVER despairiminit October 10 2010, 20:55:10 UTC

...That's quite a potty mouth you have.

Clearly you've spent a great deal of time on anonymous internet forums.

beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 22:36:58 UTC

WELL AT LEAST ONE OF YOU INGRATES ACTUALLY KNOWS WHAT THE INTERNET IS. DOES THAT MEAN I CAN HOOK UP TO A HUSKTOP ANYWHERE AROUND HERE?

AND NO. YOU ARE INCORRECT AND STUPID. I DON'T USE ANY FUCKING FORUMS. FORUMS ARE FOR SISSY-ASS GIRLS. AND EVEN IF I DID, I WOULDN'T POST ANONYMOUSLY. WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT IN TROLLING SOME FUCK IF THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW IT'S YOU?

AND WHO TOLD YOU IT WOULD BE OK TO COMPARE MY MOUTH TO A FUCKING LOAD GAPER? THAT'S FUCKING NASTY, MAN.

despairiminit October 10 2010, 22:41:41 UTC

I'm afraid not. There's only basic electricity. No television, either.

You seemed the type. Or the youngsters who like to hack into government agencies in order to spell out words that only have humor within a certain community. And, perhaps you had a tripcode.

Not that I would know about that...

Well, your language is very. Colorful.

1/2 beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 22:46:38 UTC

YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU LACK THE MENTAL FACILITIES TO DO SO. BECAUSE YOU ARE A HUMAN. ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME? I AM IMPLYING THAT ALL HUMANS ARE STUPID. LIKE YOU. I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO SPELL THIS OUT FOR YOU, BECAUSE I DON'T THINK YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND IF I DIDN'T.

JEGUS, I NEED TO FIND SOMEONE AROUND HERE WHO'S EVEN REMOTELY CAPABLE OF CONVERSING OR I'M GOING TO DO AN ACROBATIC FUCKING PIROUETTE OFF THE HANDLE.

2/2 Whoda thunk it'd be Karkat who wanted to die first? beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 22:49:11 UTC

WOAH, WOAH, WOAH.

WOAH.

WOAH.

WAIT.

WHAT??

THERE'S NO FUCKING ELECTRICITY? NO TELEVISION? HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO WATCH THE THRESH PRINCE?

OH MY GOG.

I HAVE OBVIOUSLY DONE SOMETHING TO DESERVE THIS. SOMETHING HORRIBLE. I MUST BE IN TROLL HELL OR SOMETHING. THAT IS THE OBVIOUS ANSWER. I HAVE DIED AND BEEN CONFINED TO AN ETERNITY OF RETARDED CLOWNS AND YOU FUCKERS.

THERE IS NOTHING LEFT FOR ME.

WELL GOOD NOW THEY CAN FORM A CONTRACT 1/IDEK despairiminit October 10 2010, 22:52:24 UTC

Well! Clearly you've come to the epiphany that you no longer wish to live!
Thankfully, I came to this conclusion years ago!

Now, there are many ways to end your life on this island:

1) Poison
2) Stabbing
3) Insult whatever Gods may be
4) Smear yourself in peanut butter and wait for Unicorns to devour you

I do, however, reserve hanging for my own personal dispatch. It's a bit of my signature.

2/2 despairiminit October 10 2010, 22:52:53 UTC

Would you like to make a suicide pact?

beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 23:04:16 UTC

OK, YEAH. SURE. I AM GOING TO KILL MYSELF OVER A LITTLE SOMETHING LIKE BEING MISERABLE FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY.

YEAH FUCKING RIGHT.

I BET THAT'S JUST WHAT YOU WANT, ISN'T IT? FOR ME TO JUST END IT ALL? WELL GUESS WHAT. I'M A BORN FUCKING LEADER AND IT'S GOING TO TAKE MORE THAN A LITTLE FUCKING LACK OF ENTERTAINMENT FOR ME TO KILL MYSELF.

I MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN A LITTLE WORKED UP OVER THAT, BUT I'M OK. I'M FINE, AND I AM CERTAINLY NOT GOING TO KILL MYSELF, BUT YOU KNOW. HAVE FUN WITH THAT. WHEN YOU DO IT, BE SURE TO LET ME KNOW, BECAUSE I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO WATCH THIS HAPPEN.

1/2 despairiminit October 10 2010, 23:05:14 UTC

Really?

2/2 despairiminit October 10 2010, 23:06:38 UTC

Well, here's my schedule for suicide attempts:

8AM: Pills

10AM: Jump off roof

12PM: Lunch

2PM: Drowning

4PM: Tea

6PM: Hanging.

Give or take.

beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 23:13:13 UTC

I-

YOU-

OK, YOU KNOW WHAT. ALRIGHT. IF I COULD FIGURE OUT WHERE THE FUCK ANYONE IN THIS PLACE WAS, I WOULD BE THERE IN A HEARTBEAT. I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO WATCH YOU EXPEND YOUR LAST PATHETIC BREATHS IN MY PRESENCE.

BY THE WAY, WHERE DO THE HOUSE PLAYERS IN THIS GAME? DO I HAVE TO LIKE, KILL SOMEONE AND CLAIM THEIR HOUSE?

despairiminit October 10 2010, 23:14:46 UTC

Wonderful! I'll make you tea.

And, there is housing for new arrivals.

[A map goes here because Nozomu is feeling teacherly and helpful I guess.]

i don't think he gets nozomu at all. beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 23:19:48 UTC

UH...OK.

THANKS.

I GUESS.

Thas' alright. I don't think he gets him either. despairiminit October 10 2010, 23:20:36 UTC

You're very welcome! And what's your name?

beepbeep_meow October 10 2010, 23:35:28 UTC

NOT THAT YOU DESERVE TO KNOW, BUT IT'S KARKAT.

despairiminit October 10 2010, 23:36:26 UTC

Carcat?

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