Been a while...
I don't know if it is a part of being a stupid girl, or if I'm just a glutton for punishment. But I find myself putting myself in the way of things that will only make my heart stop then start again when I finally let my breath out of my lungs where I've been holding it for seconds, minutes, waiting for something...I just don't know what.
I don't know if it's a part of being a stupid girl, or just me, that even though I've let so much go, I still hold on and in the middle of the night when I can't sleep I'm reading things I shouldn't be, remembering things I should have filed away under "lost causes/fucked beyond belief," and contemplating pushing big red buttons that scream DO NOT PUSH, ONLY BAD THINGS CAN HAPPEN IF YOU DO....
I don't know if it's a part of being a stupid girl, or just me, that even though I've let so much go, I still hold on and in the middle of the night when I can't sleep I'm reading things I shouldn't be, remembering things I should have filed away under "lost causes/fucked beyond belief," and contemplating pushing big red buttons that scream DO NOT PUSH, ONLY BAD THINGS CAN HAPPEN IF YOU DO....