(no subject)
For the past day and a half, I have felt the worst pain that I think I have ever felt, both mentally and physically. Christian, the only son of a couple of good friends of mine, passed away Friday afternoon. He was just a few days shy of his third birthday. He was found in the pool of their home.
I first found out about it here on LJ. When I called Dante to confirm the news, as soon as I started to speak, I started crying the hardest I ever have in my life. After I hung up the phone, I continued to bawl my eyes out for roughly twenty minutes or so. Then I called my mom to tell her the news, and another round of bawling ensued. Ever since then, I have been either completely emotionally numb or I can burst into tears within a second. My body physically aches when I think about what happened and what all I would give up just to have him alive again.
Christian was my special little friend. When I lived with Larry and Dorothy, I helped take care of him and all of L and D's other children. Whenever they were sick or tired, I'd help take care of them whenever I could. I can still remember him handing me his bottle or cup when I went into the kitchen so I could get him some juice. I remember him flirting with me and always trying to get my attention and trying to get me to play with him. He'd sit on my lap or by me on the couch whenever everybody was watching a movie. I remember him looking curiously at his new baby sister Tabetha in the hospital and how cute it was to see the new big brother take interest.
I know part of my heart will be closed off or dead forever because of this. I consider Christian and his sisters like nieces and nephews, even like my own children; that's how much I love them and how much they mean to me. If something happened to Larry or Dorothy, I would take them in if need be, no questions asked and no matter how much work it would be.
I consider this a death in the family. Every part of me aches and hurts and I don't know when it will stop.
To Dante and everyone else up in KC, I have started making plans to come up for the funeral on Wednesday. Since I only got the message from Allen a few hours ago, I haven't told my bosses about when I would need off, but I did tell them that I would be coming up there. If they consider it a problem when I tell them tomorrow, well then I guess it's too bad for them, because I am coming up there....hell, I'm mostly done packing. Anyways, if I leave when I planned, I should be in KC sometime Monday afternoon/evening. Give me a call then if you want to or if I haven't heard from you, I will give you a call.
I first found out about it here on LJ. When I called Dante to confirm the news, as soon as I started to speak, I started crying the hardest I ever have in my life. After I hung up the phone, I continued to bawl my eyes out for roughly twenty minutes or so. Then I called my mom to tell her the news, and another round of bawling ensued. Ever since then, I have been either completely emotionally numb or I can burst into tears within a second. My body physically aches when I think about what happened and what all I would give up just to have him alive again.
Christian was my special little friend. When I lived with Larry and Dorothy, I helped take care of him and all of L and D's other children. Whenever they were sick or tired, I'd help take care of them whenever I could. I can still remember him handing me his bottle or cup when I went into the kitchen so I could get him some juice. I remember him flirting with me and always trying to get my attention and trying to get me to play with him. He'd sit on my lap or by me on the couch whenever everybody was watching a movie. I remember him looking curiously at his new baby sister Tabetha in the hospital and how cute it was to see the new big brother take interest.
I know part of my heart will be closed off or dead forever because of this. I consider Christian and his sisters like nieces and nephews, even like my own children; that's how much I love them and how much they mean to me. If something happened to Larry or Dorothy, I would take them in if need be, no questions asked and no matter how much work it would be.
I consider this a death in the family. Every part of me aches and hurts and I don't know when it will stop.
To Dante and everyone else up in KC, I have started making plans to come up for the funeral on Wednesday. Since I only got the message from Allen a few hours ago, I haven't told my bosses about when I would need off, but I did tell them that I would be coming up there. If they consider it a problem when I tell them tomorrow, well then I guess it's too bad for them, because I am coming up there....hell, I'm mostly done packing. Anyways, if I leave when I planned, I should be in KC sometime Monday afternoon/evening. Give me a call then if you want to or if I haven't heard from you, I will give you a call.