"What a Mockery he has made of the Standard Operating Procedure!"
Drill Sergeants have to be creative and find new ways to punish privates for different violations of army training and standards. For instance, not being in formation on time, making their bunks incorrectly, or just leaving their crap out in the bay.
Smoking the crap out of privates only works for so long, and then they start getting the impression that the drill sergeant will smoke them anyway, so they get lazy. You can threaten them with counseling statements, but I personally only reserve that for the ones that really piss me off (leave a paper trail to help with the article fifteens later). My latest thing? Essays. Also called RBIs, though for the life of me I do not know what RBI stands for.
Why are Essays so effective? One of two reasons, it takes the valuable personal time of the private to write, and they have to think hard about what they are writing about, especially when they learn that I actually read the essays they write me. So it makes them have to contemplate why they were wrong in their act.
So today, I walk into the bay and I notice a few things are jacked up. We are nearing 'Blue Phase' and the privates are still all sorts of jacked up. However, tomorrow is their PT test so I have to watch that I don't smoke them to hard so they are prepared for their PT Test. Anyway, some had their jackets out, some had their PTs not squared away, some had their shoes jacked up, though I think I got the message for the bunks. Anyway, I had about twenty essays that I wanted turned in, something like '500 word essay on the importance of your PT display' or '1000 word essay on why you secure your field jacket', or whatever I had planned. If they don't write it and turn it in on time, I make them write more essays, or add to it. They love that.
Privates hate it when you might potential mess with their rare moments of personal time.
Anyway, two privates decided to get creative. Instead of writing an essay on what they did, they decided to tell a story about what happened that narrates a tale of woe, versus actually stating what they did wrong and what they learned from it. PVT Farrell titles his essay "The Horrifying Tale of the PT Display that Violated Standard Operating Procedure". In it, he describes himself as a happy go lucky private that is doing his thing and thinks he is squared away, when the Drill Sergeant enters the picture.
"While in class, PVT Farrell's Drill Sergeant walked through the bay and stopped abruptly and disgusted by PVT Farrell's wall locker. 'What a mockery he has made of the Standard Operating Procedure' the drill sergeant thought to herself."
From now on, whenever any Private does anything like that, I am going to say that out loud. Mockery is going to become my new word for the rest of this cycle, granted if I can keep a straight face when saying it.
But then there was his bunkmate who I also got an essay from, titled 'the Field Jacket. . .' with the ominous multiple use of the period. His story starts out EXACTLY the same as PVT Farrell's, only he had to draw it out to a thousand words, though he talks about urinating quite a bit.
"It was in that moment of confusion and dismay that the private, for whatever reason decided he was never going to hang his field jacket on the bed post. . . Some soldiers say he decided this because combatives was coming up soon and he wanted to get certified very very badly. Some soldiers say he decided to never hang his field jacket on the bed post becuase he wasnt positive on what to do with it, but when he saw it thrown into the nasty nasty dirty floor made him realize he did the wrong thing that day. . . if you ask me, I'd say he made the decision to never hang ehis field jacket on the bed post is becuase the private was scared to death that his drill sergeant would turn into an evil PT Monster and make the poor private do flutter-kicks, frog kicks and push-ups till he couldn't move and then the PT Monster Drill Sergeant would then consume the private's soul and make the private live out the remainder of eternity in Ft Knox Basic combat training!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!"
So, I can become an Evil PT Monster. Sweet! This privates know I can and will smoke teh shit out of them at times.
Anyway, both privates now have to write an essay on properly writing an essay. 1000 words. Do tomorrow.
I need to go through the other 'bitchfests' which is what most privates write 'I don't understand the point of writing an essay about my shoe display' will also likely have to rewrite an essay as well.
But really, they hate writing essays. I'm going to have to start upping the word count for blue phase, and it will likely come with counseling statements. And Push Ups.
Smoking the crap out of privates only works for so long, and then they start getting the impression that the drill sergeant will smoke them anyway, so they get lazy. You can threaten them with counseling statements, but I personally only reserve that for the ones that really piss me off (leave a paper trail to help with the article fifteens later). My latest thing? Essays. Also called RBIs, though for the life of me I do not know what RBI stands for.
Why are Essays so effective? One of two reasons, it takes the valuable personal time of the private to write, and they have to think hard about what they are writing about, especially when they learn that I actually read the essays they write me. So it makes them have to contemplate why they were wrong in their act.
So today, I walk into the bay and I notice a few things are jacked up. We are nearing 'Blue Phase' and the privates are still all sorts of jacked up. However, tomorrow is their PT test so I have to watch that I don't smoke them to hard so they are prepared for their PT Test. Anyway, some had their jackets out, some had their PTs not squared away, some had their shoes jacked up, though I think I got the message for the bunks. Anyway, I had about twenty essays that I wanted turned in, something like '500 word essay on the importance of your PT display' or '1000 word essay on why you secure your field jacket', or whatever I had planned. If they don't write it and turn it in on time, I make them write more essays, or add to it. They love that.
Privates hate it when you might potential mess with their rare moments of personal time.
Anyway, two privates decided to get creative. Instead of writing an essay on what they did, they decided to tell a story about what happened that narrates a tale of woe, versus actually stating what they did wrong and what they learned from it. PVT Farrell titles his essay "The Horrifying Tale of the PT Display that Violated Standard Operating Procedure". In it, he describes himself as a happy go lucky private that is doing his thing and thinks he is squared away, when the Drill Sergeant enters the picture.
"While in class, PVT Farrell's Drill Sergeant walked through the bay and stopped abruptly and disgusted by PVT Farrell's wall locker. 'What a mockery he has made of the Standard Operating Procedure' the drill sergeant thought to herself."
From now on, whenever any Private does anything like that, I am going to say that out loud. Mockery is going to become my new word for the rest of this cycle, granted if I can keep a straight face when saying it.
But then there was his bunkmate who I also got an essay from, titled 'the Field Jacket. . .' with the ominous multiple use of the period. His story starts out EXACTLY the same as PVT Farrell's, only he had to draw it out to a thousand words, though he talks about urinating quite a bit.
"It was in that moment of confusion and dismay that the private, for whatever reason decided he was never going to hang his field jacket on the bed post. . . Some soldiers say he decided this because combatives was coming up soon and he wanted to get certified very very badly. Some soldiers say he decided to never hang his field jacket on the bed post becuase he wasnt positive on what to do with it, but when he saw it thrown into the nasty nasty dirty floor made him realize he did the wrong thing that day. . . if you ask me, I'd say he made the decision to never hang ehis field jacket on the bed post is becuase the private was scared to death that his drill sergeant would turn into an evil PT Monster and make the poor private do flutter-kicks, frog kicks and push-ups till he couldn't move and then the PT Monster Drill Sergeant would then consume the private's soul and make the private live out the remainder of eternity in Ft Knox Basic combat training!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!"
So, I can become an Evil PT Monster. Sweet! This privates know I can and will smoke teh shit out of them at times.
Anyway, both privates now have to write an essay on properly writing an essay. 1000 words. Do tomorrow.
I need to go through the other 'bitchfests' which is what most privates write 'I don't understand the point of writing an essay about my shoe display' will also likely have to rewrite an essay as well.
But really, they hate writing essays. I'm going to have to start upping the word count for blue phase, and it will likely come with counseling statements. And Push Ups.