Lazy Sunday
Rate My Kitten is a great remedy for boredom sometimes...
I need a friend man. A girlfriend to tell things to and paint toe nails with. I need another girl who isn't always busy. Someone I can completely open up to and trust. I haven't had that in so long. It's the only thing that really hits me emotionally. I get tired of sitting in the bathroom stalls at lunch. I get tired of sharing personal feelings with just my boyfriend. I get tired of trying to initiate friendships with other girls I think are so cool, and then winding up seeing them once every two weeks. I wish a had a tight nit group of really level-headed, down to earth girls. People I could watch independent films with and invite over for great international foods. Friends I could call up when things are rough and talk to without having to put a guard up. Girls who'd go to shows with me. Natalie really fucked me up. I hate hating someone so much. I've never hated someone as much as I deeply and passionately hate her. I was stabbed in the back after everything we'd been through. And now I have this overwhelming insecurity about making a new friend.
On a lighter note I'm going to the mall in a little bit with my Mom. I think I'll get a skirt, or some cute underwear. Consume to occupy my mind so I can stop thinking myself into depression.