I Don't Know, Something Not Spoilery.
Well, that was the darkest thing I've ever watched in my life, and I've watched all of Supernatural. Frobisher's end in particular was so upsetting. I spent the whole time since he requested the Obviously A Gun thinking NO, FROBISHER, DON'T DO IT. And then he came home and he was smiling when he hugged his children and then adfsdkhjajhfajhadjfjaghh I hate you Torchwood.
THE DOOR WAS CLOSED. WE DIDN'T SEE WHAT HAPPENED. MAYBE HE JUST SHOT A PARTICULARLY ANNOYING BIRD SINGING OUTSIDE THE WINDOW.
Oh, and if he hadn't done it Jack would still have stopped the 456 (let's not talk about how he managed it; one intensely depressing event at a time) and Frobisher's children would have been fine.
My sooooul.
Moving onto the second intensely depressing event: I was actually expecting it to turn out that Stephen was also immortal, and Jack to heave a huge sigh of relief, and then for Alice to go LIKE YOU'RE EVER SEEING EITHER OF US AGAIN EVEN IF HE IS ALIVE (understandably) and Jack to go :(. That wouldn't have been much less depressing, really, but it was what I was expecting. I didn't think they would actually kill the small child. Which is, in retrospect, odd, given that they had had Frobisher kill his entire family earlier that very episode.
(I was mildly put off by Alice's inability to stop smiling. PLEASE STOP LOOKING SO DELIGHTED WHEN LOOKING AT FOOTAGE OF A HORRIBLY MUTATED DRUG-CHILD, ALICE.)
I don't actually know what I thought HEY WAIT WHAT HAPPENED TO LOIS
WHAT
IS SHE STILL IN THE CELL
WHAT HAPPENED THERE SERIOUSLY
Ahem. Anyway.
I don't know whether that episode was good or not! It was so thoroughly depressing that I cannot tell whether I enjoyed it. Hmm.
(EDIT: I have just been looking at Twitter updates about Torchwood, and I have stumbled across this one by Warren Ellis, in which he refers to the latest series as TORCHWOOD 3: THE CRYENING. This is the perfect name for it and I shall use it from now on.)
I have never written Torchwood fanfiction, and I'm not in the habit of writing fix-it fic, and yet I do find myself wanting to write fanfiction in which EVERYTHING IS HAPPY AND FINE AND MAGICAL.
IANTO AND OWEN AND TOSH COME BACK TO LIFE. THEN OWEN GOES AWAY BECAUSE HE MAKES OTHER PEOPLE UNHAPPY. POSSIBLY HE OCCASIONALLY POPS UP TO MAKE AMUSING COMMENTS.
FROBISHER KILLED AN ANNOYING BIRD AND THEN HE AND HIS FAMILY FORM THE CAST FOR 'FROBISHER AND FRIENDS', A BRAND NEW SPINOFF ABOUT FROBISHER BEING PUT UPON BY THE GOVERNMENT AND HILARITY AND NO DEATH ENSUING.
(Seriously, the absolute bastard of a Prime Minister really did pile a lot upon poor Frobisher. Having done all the speaking to the terrifying alien, you'd think he'd have gained a reprieve from the 'having your children turned into drugs' bit.)
Hey, at least Rhys and Gwen survived! I was beginning to fear that no non-immortal characters would make it to the end of this series. I've come to love Gwen, and I've always loved Rhys, so that's something. (Also there were parts of this episode in which Rhys was carrying and talking to small children, and I found this the most charming thing in the world. I am sure he and Gwen will be wonderful parents. Of course, as this is Torchwood and Torchwood hates happiness, they're probably going to give birth to James Sunderland or something.)