Sadness, shopping, and songs
It's weird how everything can change in just a short span of time. Just last Saturday I was so happy- so happy that the 4 tiny dimples on my right cheek combined into one massive dimple (refer to photo). I woke up smiling and went to sleep beaming still. Same thing happened on Sunday. And then Monday came and everything came crashing down.
I lost two very good friends last Monday. One died and one left. I'm not so good at coping with loss. Finding out about my dear friend's death made me break down and cry. It was so hard dealing with it because I've become such a private person. It's easier when you can let everything out instead of being all bottled up. I used to be so open but after some time, I realized it was better to keep most of my thoughts and emotions to myself. The only person I truly share everything with was Calvin and I pissed him off again that day. I was such an emotional wreck that time because of what happened to Joyce and it affected my mood and words. I told him words I would have never said if I were in the right state of mind. I guess to make it short, he doesn't want to have anything to do with me anymore (for the 4598305803th time lol). Well, I can't blame him. I'm tired of dealing with myself too.
I can feel depression's presence in me again but I try to ignore and deny it. Being depressed is so horrible and I don't want to deal with it again. So I've been keeping myself busy and entertained these days. Yesterday, I made rainbow star accessories and talked to friends for hours (something I rarely do). Today, I went shopping.
I guess I must be extremely sad today cause I ended up emptying my wallet. This is shocking cause I am the princess of thriftiness. Well, not that it had a lot of money. It only had US$15 lol. Well that's still a lot for me!
So here are the things I bought today~
Tiny Light Pink Glittery Bow Hairclip
~ I've been wanting to buy this clip for the longest time but my stinginess always got hold of me. See, this clip is US$1. Who actually pays US$1 for such a tiny hairclip?! *sees customers raising hands* Oops. ^-^;;
Tiny Light Blue Glittery Heart Hairclip
~ I bought this clip too cause I don't know. I just felt like buying it cause I love hearts. I wish it were pink instead of blue though. I hardly wear blue.
Strawberry Pin
~ I bought two of this just cuz it had strawberries. I was hoping to find the heart-shaped cherry one and the star-shaped rainbow one I bought back in December but all they had were these. Of course one goes to str4wberrylover (for obvious reasons). I don't know what to do with the remaining one. Prolly include it in a future super kawaii package or something.
Star Galaxy Ring
~ Speaking of str4wberrylover, I bought this ring for her. I don't know where you are right now Tiff but this ring reminded me so much of that necklace Wilson got for you. The Meteor Garden one? Lol I'm not so sure if you'll like it! I honestly bought it just because it reminded me of that necklace and because it had a star on it. Eep. Well, you did say you've been liking bling lately. Heheh.
Oh heheh yeah~ str4wberrylover is my favorite girl to shop for because I know her style very well and I keep on seeing things with strawberries, dolphins, and stars on them. metooha and yuumimochi~ you guys should update me with your fashion style atm so I can shop for you guys too. ;p
Starry Sticker Book
~ I'm so happy about this purchase. I've been wanting to buy this San-x Cosmic Star sticker book from Kawaii Corner for the longest time but I found it to be too pricey for US$10 + US$11 S&H. I tried sweet-talking Cal into buying it for me months ago but he refused lol. I love stickers but I stare at them instead of use them. So it's really a must for me to own a sticker book.
I was really surprised when I saw this. It looks even cuter than the san-x one. And it has 30 sticker sheets (60 pages), 20 memo sheets (40 pages) plus a clear file. The San-x one only had 25 sticker sheets! And it wasn't puffy and 3d-ey like this one. Also, this sticker book cost me only US$1.50!!! Yay.
Happy Day Orange Stationery Set
~ This reminded me of squeeeezay (aka the only person I know who thinks oranges are the cutest fruit ever) so I got them for her. I think it looks pretty cute. I like the color combination and design.
Glittery Dragonflies Pink Girly Blouse
~ I bought my friend cumulonimbus13 this really girly pink angel winged top with dragonflies on it. Steph loves dragonflies, you see. I have this tendency of buying friends items that remind me of their likes. Lol please don't tell me what you like anymore as I might go broke.
I.L.U. Letter Set
~ I have this weird habit of buying sweet greeting cards and letter sets for writing to Cal but lol, I never write on them, much more send them. I don't know why I bought this especially now that he's really gone. I guess there's a part of me that still hopes he'll come back.
I thought this looked really sweet though, especially the matching toothbrushes with hearts on them. The text goes like this:
I love you...
You know how I long for you.
My heart goes strong for you.
Please be mine.
Hahaha. I don't think I'll ever use this letter set.
Cutie Cellfone / MP3 / Digital Camera Sticker Sheets
~ I bought these two new designs. I think they look really cute~ especially the one with the cherries and ice cream. But they're a bit too bright for me and I'm not sure if I'll get to use them. I'll probably end up selling them or something.
These sheets are actually semi-transparent and rainbowy-hologramy in real life.
The remaining of my money went to KFC's Chicken Caesar Salad + Pepsi (my favorite)!
I thought I bought a lot but I realized that I didn't really buy much. I'm used to buying more... but not for me but for sales and shopping services. Sigh. I feel so sad while shopping too cause it reminds me of Joyce. I always shopped for her. Everytime I went to the mall, I always made sure to keep an eye for things she might like. It so sad seeing stuff she would've loved if she were still alive.
Sigh.
I guess I'll be fine soon.
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I think some people added me for music. Here are the songs in my current mini playlist.
1. Yukari Fresh - Raymond ♥
~ This is a beautiful sad-sounding song from Yukari Fresh (whose songs are mostly upbeat and cheery). I really like it. It sounds so sweet to the ear.
2. Three Berry IceCream - K-L-M Line ♥
~ This was the first 3BI song I've ever heard. Just a few months ago, I managed to acquire all of her major releases. Her other songs are truly sweet and pure ear candy but K-L-M Line is still the one that stands out the most for me. I love listening to it.
~ This is a cover of The Fairways song of the same title. Does anyone have it? I'm curious how the original sounds like.
3. The Fairways - Winter Song
~ This is another song I like from the Permanent Vacation EP. I like the music and vocals very much.
4. Tahiti 80 & Kahimi Karie - (We'll Go) Separate Ways
~ I like this song too, mostly cause I can relate to it (how selfish of me). I like it better than the original. But then again, I'm biased cause I'm a Kahimi Karie fan.
5. Neil & Iraiza - This is Not a Love Song
~ Oh this is a band I want to hear more about. I've only heard 3 songs of theirs. I wish to hear more before actually buying their album online. Share, anyone?
*For those who don't know~ Neil is Hideki Kaji and Iraiza is Hirohisa Horie. Two talented boys = good music for sure!
6. Ketchup - Garbage Tree
~ I don't know how popular Ketchup is in Hong Kong but I'm guessing this is one of his hit singles (just because its music video was included in the Come Out & Play dvd). It's not my favorite song of his but I enjoy listening to it. This is the kind of song you play and sing with while driving around town on a sunny Sunday afternoon (if you like guitar pop).
7. Cornelius - Blow My Mind
~ I included this just because it sounded good next to Garbage Tree. Silly, I know.
8. South San Gabriel - The Dark of Garage ♥
~ I love this song. It's comforting in a sad kind of way. I never get tired of listening to it.
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PS
I'll announce the contest winner when I'm in a happier mood, okay? It feels so fake celebrating when I'm so down. Sorry. u_u