It’s not gay if it’s on the Mississippi (10/12)
Last time on ~It’s not gay if it’s on the Mississipppi~: Silver reaches the circus, only to be instantly abducted again by Nicky. They bang in the coach rather than finally answer some pressing questions, and then Nicky is suddenly knocked out by Bassinger. Thrilling things, all of them.
If you want to read the whole debacle from the get-go, start here.
Note: I’ve noticed this is a mess in mobile version, but I don’t really know how to fix it, sorry! Crossposted on tumblr.
Nicholas wakes up in his room on the ship, watched over by the local best boys.
“We don’t know. When you didn’t follow him to the boat, Mikhail came back up the levee. He found you unconscious with two lumps as big as ostrich eggs on your head.” Valentin paused.
“Unfortunately, you were still alive, though.”
“What’s that?”
“Nothing uwu”
Nicky thinks Silver must have been taken by one of the circus members, but then our villain shows up the second after, because tension?? In this book??
“I do hope you’re feeling better, Savron. I really hated to hit you on the head, as I wanted you to be able to think clearly when I offered my terms.”
I’m amazed he’s able to finish his sentence. He knocked Nicky out, and yet, Mikhail doesn’t kill him on sight. Maybe Mikhail thinks this was karmic punishment for Nicky treating Silver like shit.
“So arrogant.” Bassinger’s tone was almost approving. “Do you know that’s what drew me to you that night at Madam LaRue’s? You wore your damn arrogance like an ermine-trimmed cloak and everyone was fawning all over you. The great Russian prince with the whole world at his fingertips. You were just like those fancy Natchez planter folk up on the hill.”
And that’s exactly my type~
I mean, it’s not like you gave me a gay panic. I instantly zoomed in on you as an adversary!
Honestly, Bassinger, leave the whole “My sexuality is finding arrogant people and ruining their life” affair to people smarter and more fun than you.
Originally posted by becauseilovedher
Nicky asks where Silver is.
“Your little pullet? She must be good if you still want her after all the trouble she’s caused you. Perhaps I may try her myself.”
I’d say it’s cheap to mark your villain by having him be a misogynist rapist, but in a book where the love interest hero is all of the above himself, maybe it’s actually deeper than I thought! Not the duality of men, but two sides of the same coin driving the story, hmhm.
“I will break his bones,” Mikhail offered mildly. “He will tell you after the second bone is snapped.” He studied Bassinger. “Perhaps after only the first one is broken. I think he has no courage.”
Mikhail <3
Bassinger threatens that Silver will be killed if something happens to him, which tbh…
“And what do you propose to do to us?” Nicholas asked without expression. “I’m sure you have a plan in mind.”
“Oh, yes.” Bassinger nodded with satisfaction. “I’m going to rid you of a little of that arrogance. I’m going to get the Rose back and I’m going to enjoy having your little schoolgirl do a number of pleasurable tricks for me.”
“Maybe I’ll also have you do a number of pleasurable tricks for me, tbh.”
OK look, I know sexual violence jokes about men are an issue, but with how obsessed this book is with sexual violence against at women, let me have this.
Nicholas hands clenched into fists at his side. “I do believe I may draw and quarter you.”
“Excellent idea,” Valentin murmured, his light eyes icy cold. “I’d be delighted to assist.”
Bassinger moistened his lips with his tongue.
Also, Valentin is do-s #confirmed.
Bassinger claims he’s got all judges along the Mississippi in his pocket, which probably explains why he’s so broke that he lost his flag ship in a card game to a Russian dude, and that he calls all shots from now on and doesn’t just want his ship back, but also see Nicky suffer. Which, understandable, but you’re also a piece of shit, so I can’t really enjoy it :\
Bassinger declares they’ll have a boat race, with him taking a smaller and lighter vessel.
“If you arrive first in New Orleans, I’ll allow you to return the Rose and give you the bitch you apparently hold in such esteem. If I win, you’ll still return the Rose and I’ll keep the Delaney woman until I tire of her.”
Well, if that’s not the sales pitch if the decade, then I don’t know what is!
I guess he’s honest, at least?
He opened the door and glanced back at them, fierce satisfaction on his face. “You understand, of course, that since I’ve made the rules and the stakes, I can also change them at any time. You might remember that, your highness.”
There’s also more gross sexist and racist stuff which I cut for your sake, don’t say I’ve never done anything for you!
Valentin gave a low whistle. “Nicky, he’s not-”
“Sane,” Nicholas finished grimly. “And it wouldn’t surprise me if he were capable of the same sorts of vicious little tricks made notorious by our good tsar Ivan.”
RUSSIA 🇷🇺 🇷🇺
Also, gotta love that Valentin’s only reaction to this death-or-life situation is basically “Whew, that’s a pickle!”
“We follow him.” Nicholas stood up, swaying as waves of pain pounded his temples. “Yapping at the bastard’s heels.”
“I don’t like it,” Valentin said, frowning. “Why don’t we go after him now and-”
(ﾉ◕ω◕)ﾉ～『✧~*ARSON AND MURDER*~✧』
“Do you think I wouldn’t prefer that too? I can’t risk it. It’s my fault Silver is being used as Bassinger’s pawn. If I hadn’t brought her on board the Rose, he would never have known she existed. The blame for anything he does lies on my shoulders.”
This is such a nice narrative trick - look, Nicky admits his faults! He’s growing as a mushroom! I mean, he just claims that the only issue was making Silver and Bassinger meet, not the whole kidnapping and sexual assault part, but it looks like something at first glance ! (•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑
Nicky orders to kick out all baggage, including passengers, but is at least kind enough to give them all money so that they can book a different ship, and we cut hard to:
“Come along, sweet bitch.” Bassinger jerked Silver to her feet.
Honestly, is this book for masochists? I personally could do with a lot less woman hating language and actions in my published PWP, but you do you.
Silver still has zero survival instincts, because when he tells her he’s been out for revenge ever since she made a fool of him at dinner, of course she doubles down:
“You looked very funny,” Silver said calmly. “Everyone thought so. Do you remember how they laughed at you? They’ll laugh again when I-”
She broke off, her head snapping back as Bassinger struck her viciously on the cheek.
There’s being feisty and self assured, and there’s being plain dumb suicidal.
He plans to make an example out of her on the rear deck so that Nicky can see, and we get a hilarious detail:
“You’re quite helpless, you know. No one will interfere. Most of the passengers are asleep, but I’ve ordered their staterooms locked as a precaution.
He actually admitted real paying passengers on the ship he uses in a life or death race with a trigger happy foreigner where weight is one deciding factor. And his solution is just. Lock them in. This is why your company has a zero star rating on yelp, Lee.
He ties her to the railing with the help of an equally depraved sailor of his and declares he’ll whip her.
“I have a fancy to let his highness know how much I’m hurting you. Scream high and sweetly, bitch.”
Because I’m evil McEvilton /twirls mustache
Valentin’s gaze followed that of Nicholas and Robert to the brightly lit Texas deck of the Mary L. He swallowed. “Christ, how long has it been going on?”
“Five minutes, maybe a little more.” Robert looked away, his hands tightening on the wheel. “It can’t go on much longer. She’s a woman, for God’s sake. She’ll collapse and that will be the end of it.”
“She won’t collapse.” Nicholas’s eyes were glittering in the lantern light. “I wish she would. She won’t give in to the pain until he kills her.”
Valentin s underreactions are the best.
Also, of course Silver is so brave that she has decided not to keel and thus will end up dying for her bravery :( So sad :(
Robert, our drunk river pilot, says they’ll have caught up to shooting range in a few minutes.
“A few minutes!” Nicholas looked at him incredulously. “He’s beating her to death with that whip.”
“Nicholas,” Valentin’s voice was very gentle. “He can’t do any more than he’s doing right now.
I mean I guess he could stop whipping her and do other things, cut off some fingers or take a page out of your book and rape her, or brand her, or anything really, but I’m sure this man lacks my creativity (ﾉ◕ω◕)ﾉ～『✧~*ARSON AND MURDER*~✧』
Nicky decides to try and give some warning shots anyway, because why not squander the opportunity to take Bassinger out as a sniper. He also starts wondering about what kind of whip might be used, because:
Igor had used a knout on him. Ten lashes with a knout were supposed to kill a man, but thirty hadn’t killed Nicholas. She had taken more than ten lashes now. Pray God, it was another kind of whip Bassinger was using on Silver.
Okay then!
God, why did she stand there so proudly? The silent defiance of her stance was all that crazy bastard needed to keep that lash ripping at her.
There was a blurring before Nicholas’s eyes and then he felt two tears run slowly down his cheeks. He wiped his eyes with his sleeve before he took aim with the rifle.
Two Single Tears™ of manliness. Also, you sound like you’re in perfect condition to take a shot that might end up hitting Silver instead with how you’re shaking. Let ya boy Valya do this instead.
Bassinger sends his henchman to put on more steam, and the man is sad that he’ll miss a bit of the torture session. Because he’s eviiiiiiiilllll
“Nicholas must be very perturbed to try anything so futile,” Bassinger drawled. “It has to be annoying for him to feel so helpless. But you’re not helping me, my dear. One shrill, agonized scream would increase his pain tremendously.” He drew back his arm. “I’m done toying with you.”
The lash came down with his full strength behind it, breaking the skin and causing a tiny river of blood to run down her back. “Scream, you strumpet!”
I read crumpets at first. Still hilarious. Anyway, she still doesn’t scream because she’s just that badass!
Robert realizes the ship is putting on more steam and freaks out, because he knows it to have boilers that won’t be able to take the pressure.
His eyes flicked open and he swerved the wheel violently to the left.
“What the devil are you doing?” Nicholas shouted.
“I’m getting out of the way.” Robert didn’t look at him as he veered toward the eastern bank of the river. “And hoping to God I’m in time.”
A ship is not a car. You can’t just drift it like a tank on a whim-
The Mary L exploded.
Good bye, Mary l, we hardly knew ye.