(no subject)
I got two new animals!
I was driving [amazingly, as usual] on the backroad to my house last week. There was traffic, terribly slow traffic. So here I am, in my car looking out the window[at the clouds] when this average sized gray and burgendy animal catches my eye. He was bleeding from the hip from where his piss of an owner THREW HIM OUT OF THE WINDOW. I jump out of my car, and scoop him into my long arms. He is hardly cute, and his head is a cross between cement and velvet. There are dried poo chips on his butt, and he has a facial feature that reminds me of a lesbian I want to school with. He's a chiuhuahuah and pit bull mix. I named him j'koff. [jek-off] It is italian for brilliant man.
On my way home, while cradeling this creature on my lap the rain started to get pretty bad. Big, huge, wet, hard drops kept beating on my windshield. I got pissed off and let j'koff drive while I climbed on the hood of my car to use my body as a cover when suddenly I see another animal. This time its a small, twiggish pussy. White, with yellow fur that lines her asshole. Shes wimpering because I accidently hit her with me car. I was stricken with guilt and felt prompted to scrap her off the assfault and put her in my car with J'koff. She didn't seem like a princess, or baby girl. She was harder than any of those names. While pondering of a name for my new felion, I crossed paths with a stupid fat black man. His name was albert and he was drinking extra dry gin straight from the bottle. He made me so mad so I ran him over and then killed him with my bare paws. I decided to name my new half dead kittie, vajinish. thats indian for kill people.
I cannot wait to show everyone my new animals