(no subject)
So everything was good. then it went bad. i thought itd be good again. but it stayed bad. i believe i feel like dying now. My entire being is lost. i never thought id feel this way. but i do. and wow does it hurt. i just wish i could go to sleep and never wake up to this b.s again. ever. i dont even know what happened. i tried harder than ever. i want it to be the same. 6 months never came. i wonder if it will. i was so excited. i even told my mom, and i felt proud. she laughed at me and i still was proud and i knew it would work because my heart said so. it still does. which is why it hurts so bad i guess. happiness has left for awhile. life has left for awhile. friendship has left for awhile. Rikki has left for awhile. im such a loser. how could i have let this go on so long. i knew it wouldnt last because of the unsure nature it had in the beginning. god how could i be so stupid?